When do the puppy blues go?

[momsybear]

Just that really. 15 months in and it still feels like the biggest mistake ever 😩

Oh dear. Why, what’s going on?

For me it was about 2 years. He's now 3 and things are a lot calmer and easier.

We’re currently at 9 months - I feel that things are slowly getting easier and we’re developing more of a bond but there are definitely still days where I do have regrets! I don’t want to wish her life away but at the same time just want the puppy stage to be over, sometimes it’s absolutely exhausting. We’re still in the seemingly never-ending land shark era (typical golden retriever!)…. I feel like it’s going to be a long winter - really missing being able to get out for nice walks in the evenings and the mud just seems to be never ending at the minute.. I’ve never cleaned so much in my life yet a few hours later both the dog and the house are filthy again! Finding it really difficult to keep her entertained and stimulated when the weather is awful like we’ve had over the past few weeks. She gets through snuffle mats and puzzles within 5 mins 🙈

Following with interest (and hope).

Our puppy is six months and my mental health is at rock bottom. I had post-natal depression and it reminds me of that. I feel no bond with her, I just resent her.

I hate that I feel like that and feel so guilty. Hoping it'll pass.

DH has bonded fine with her and the kids, it's just me.

My puppy blues went at about 6 months and then came back at breakneck speed at about 14 months old when my boy hit teenagerhood. Keep breathing and you'll get through this stage, doggo will grow up and settle down but it does take until they're about 2.

I have completely reset my expectations with DPup 15 months old.
My previous Ddog (gone over Rainbow bridge) was the easiest pup, we never even noticed her adolescence, bless her. DPup is completely different. I have accepted he's harder work and it will take time for him to become the fantastic DDog I know he will.
But when he first barked at people coming to the house, had a fight with another dog, had to give up training classes because he was so wired he couldn't do anything but strain at the end of the lead to get to the other dogs, I just sat down and cried because I though I was rubbish, he was broken, we'd done it all wrong... etc etc..
It took me a while to realise that he's just a baby, he needs help and support, my previous DDog was the exception, and DPup is a completely normal adolescent boy with the challenges that brings.
Once that penny dropped, I am much better, and I can see adolescence is a process we'll go through.
So hang in there OP, our pups will keep maturing and getting better! Enjoy the little victories, don't sweat the small stuff, and look back at the start when they were crying, biting, weeing, pooping, keeping you up all night standing in the garden in the rain at 3am, and realise how far we've come!

About 2 when they stop chewing on your every nerve.

Ok this feels like a safe space…..mine is 17 months old and whilst it’s easier than the early days, and I’m fond (wouldn’t say “love”) of Ddog, I can’t help but think it was a mistake and if I could rewind time I wouldn’t get DDog again 😒
Mine isn’t that bad but it’s another thing to have to look after and stress about. And losing recall in the past couple of months has been really trying.

Mine is 2.5 and he’s still a handful. He’s also not very cuddly so sometimes it feels like all the hard work is for nothing

About two and a half was turning point for me. It coincided with me getting pregnant and the hound being obsessed with guarding me.

The only puzzle that ever kept her entertained was three tea towels folded up into a fans lengthways and then tied in a twisted knot with treats in the folds. Just don't do it with tea towels you like.

Sorry people who commented. I've name changed since I posted but I'm so relieved I'm not alone. I just hate him most of the time. We've had behaviourists, I liked dogs before him but he's just awful and makes me feel so trapped. I've found so much empathy and hope in the comments- thank you all so much xxx

My pom has just turned 2. I have felt like it was the biggest mistake ever getting her on numerous occasions. The last couple of months though she has really buried herself in my heart. She pees and poops in the kitchen constantly (poms are notoriously difficult to house train), barks at all animals on the TV and barks constantly on walks. I now say she's a little bitch but she's my little bitch! I have had dogs my whole life but never had one like her!

Oh bless you OP. Puppies can be so very bloody hard. How is he awful?

I loved ddog as a puppy but not sure I liked him and how all consuming he was. So much nicer now he’s 3 and mostly well behaved. I’ve decided I’m a dog person not a puppy person (I’m the same with babies - much prefer the older stage). From 2 things were calmer.

Feel free to join us on the puppy survival thread for old and new puppies.

www.mumsnet.com/talk/the_doghouse/4945764-puppy-survival-thread-for-old-and-new-pups-heading-into-winter

Ha, the comment up thread is us completely - I have been heard to say of ours (nearly 2 now) that he's still a Twatdog, but he's now /our/ Twatdog. He's still variable out on walks - we get everything from ignoring other dogs completely and walking past, perfectly polite nose to tail greetings, the crouch down/stalk/pounce maneouvre, standing on hind legs and arooing, and the classic reactive lunging/barking. It would almost be easier if he were consistently reactive as we'd know what to expect. He's very playful and loving at home with me, but not so much the rest of the family, so my husband is not feeling the love, despite sharing the care/burden. And we've done terribly with separation training, so the most we can leave him is about 30 minutes. He's our first dog, and was my idea so I have no one to blame, but it has been a massive learning curve. I don't think we'll get another dog after this, although there are pros as well as cons to the changes he's made to our lives.

Mine is just over 2 and it’s only over the last 6 months that things have shifted for the better for me. He’s been really hard work and I used to cry every day with the guilt that I was doing something wrong and couldn’t help him. We’re working with a behaviourist and excellent dog trainer and I can finally see light at the end of the tunnel. I cringe when I say this but I did hate him for over a year or more as I just couldn’t bond or understand him. I now I’ve the bones of him and wouldn’t be without him. I think I’ve also accepted who he is and mourned the dog I wanted - and now love and accept the dog he is. He’s still hard work and we’ve got a lot to work on but we’ve now got such a bond. I hope this helps you and you can get there too

I'm in exactly the same position. Cockapoo is nearly a year old, we've had him since he was 5months. I only work half days so he's only alone for 4 hours max but he chews everything he can get his paws on. Obviously we clear everything from his reach but he will pull on tablecloth and is now able to open drawers. He digs constantly in the garden, I am permanently cleaning proper muck up. I completely underestimated how much our life would change. We are so limited in what we can do, days out etc. No spontaneous trips away. He barks continually in the car one day then not the next, no rhyme or reason but its not safe for me driving when hes that distracting. I am so depressed and fed up I just want to rehome him. I'm not a dog person but got him for my family thinking I would be in time but now I see that is not going to happen.

Our Weimaraner pup has just turned ten months and although I say I love him it's very much fake it til you make it!
I'm so envious of DH and DDs who rush home to him and declare their real love for him.
It's far worse for me because I am with him 24/7.
All I can see some days is how he stops us doing things we'd do before.
When the family say things like how sad it'll be when he gets old and dies I just think yippee, we can get a new cat!
We also have two cats and it breaks my heart that we've dropped this nuclear bomb into their lives.
I love nothing more than shutting the three of us in my bedroom and having cat cuddles.

Having said that he is a wonderful pup and I'm sure he'll be an amazing dog. Just have to count down the days 😢

Oh my god this is so depressing to read - we’ve got a 4 month old toy poodle and I am finding the disruption to our lives so very hard - the thought of it not settling down for another 18 months makes me want to cry. She’s a lovely little thing (snoozing on my foot at the moment), but it is way harder than I was expecting. I think getting a puppy in autumn and right before Christmas was a stupid idea, I’m so stressed with the thought of trying to get everything organised and not one whatsoever to do it in. Trying to squeeze work into half a day so I can spend the other half with the puppy (we both work from home and have an office upstairs so husband and I each get half a day upstairs and half a day downstairs with the puppy). I can’t concentrate on work for the downstairs half of the day because I’m getting up every 10 minutes to take her out. She’s also very nervous and I had expected to be getting out more on walks but she’s only on 10 mins twice a day so we are stuck at home a lot. Our daughter loves her but is also struggling to adapt / wants all other things to remain exactly as they always have been (she’s autistic) and it is HARD trying to keep all things going as usual on top of watching puppy like a hawk / playing with puppy/ training puppy: trying to stop puppy biting etc etc

about 3 years for mine ..might just be the breed though