Utterly Bereft

[Wedontdeservedogs]

Made the excruciatingly difficult decision to have our dog put to sleep a few days ago.
It was the absolute right time. She was 16 years & immensely loved, but her health had deteriorated so far, physically & and mentally, that her quality of life was irreversible.
I know I did the right thing for her, but I am so utterly heartbroken. It was just me & my dog most of the time as my kids are now in their early 20's & not always home, mostly doing their own thing (as they absolutely should) But besides them I'm pretty much alone.
Please tell me it gets better & how I can help myself now. I'm just so utterly lost 💔

I'm so sorry for your loss, I totally get it 😢 so heartbreaking to lose a beloved dog as they are so much part of the family. I'm on week three and alone all weekend as the children are with their dad. I'm lost and home alone, it's just awful. Everyone keeps telling me I need to get another dog but I just cannot replace her! I also hope this gets easier over time, sending virtual hugs your way xx

Nothing I can say will help OP. You grow around your grief, it doesn’t get smaller. I still miss “dog zero” desperately. We have his nephew but he can never ever be replaced and will always be in my heart.

They’re not replaceable @rockingbird but you can stretch and grow your love to accommodate another special friend. That’s how I look at it. But the grief is horrendous.

So very sorry. We had to make the same decision two weeks ago (I think you're on my thread) and I've never known grief so raw. I'm having days now where I'm numb to it, but it's still so horrible here without him. I struggled to even get out of bed this morning. Thinking of you 💐

How awful! I'm so sorry to hear that.

You'll probably continue to think about her. I still miss my pets over 20 years after leaving home. I used to dog-sit for a friend when she was out of town and still miss her dogs after five years. I think about them all a few times per week.

You will feel better but may not ever stop missing her. I think you need to remind yourself that it was better to have her in your life and miss her now than not have her.

My other advice is to recognize that this is grief and to respond as you should in any grieving situation. Keep yourself occupied until the most painful period has passed. Take up a new hobby. Maybe get on Meetup.com and find out what's going on in your area or sign up for a class. Join a gym if you haven't already and/or start doing yoga/pilates. It's a nice way to meet people. Maybe volunteer down at the local food-bank or old-people's home. Or offer to walk dogs at your local dog shelter. Maybe, when you feel ready, you could even foster dogs so that they don't have to live at the shelter?

If none of this will work, clean the house from top to bottom. This is your chance to get all the mould out of the grouting, pick every weed out of the footpath, and get into the corners of the windows. Just stay busy.

Thank you so much for posting, I'm keeping myself occupied for the moment.
I will absolutely be back to read and respond to these later this evening

Sending a hug - totally understand how you feel. After we lost our last dog I couldn’t contemplate getting another one for over a year. And the one we got (7 year old rescue) will cross the bridge this week. We have another one to keep up busy but will be taking the advice on this thread and just keeping busy 💔