What am I doing wrong with the puppy!?

[NeedHelp000]

Help!
puppy Labrador 6 months old now.
sleeps terribly during the night and it’s killing me.
she barks, I go down and let her out in the garden and she does a wee and sometimes a poo. This happens twice during the night and then she wakes up for the day a time between 5.30-6am. Honestly it’s killing me.

We’ve tried a few different sleeping environments. Crate, she hated it so we stopped it. Things got bad so we introduced it again, a couple of months made no difference and she hated it so we stopped it again.
Utility room with a baby gate.
free roam of the kitchen and living room - this initially worked for a couple of weeks and she slept through the night but now we’ve gone backwards again.

people tell me to ignore her over night when she barks or cries but she does actually need a wee or a poo so how can I ignore her? Also if I ignore her, her barking will wake up my young children. She has a good walk in the evening, dinner around 6pm, we take her water away at 8pm and we go to bed at around 10pm.

we don’t allow her upstairs so sleeping upstairs with us is not an option.

so 2 issues here, the waking in the night and the early morning rises. Please any tips welcome x

Well obviously you can’t ignore her as otherwise she will wee and poo in the house.
What time does she have her last meal?
I found when my dog did this, that it helped if I fed earlier, and took her for a short walk before bed, she’d poo then if she needed to.

I have a lot of experience with dogs, my mum used to run a shelter for homeless animals. On a gut instinct it sounds like a bad habit. Just to illustrate my point we got a 5 months Cockapoo last October. He wasn't house trained, the previous owners were working from home and he could go in and out of the garden as he pleased. It took the best part of the first month to get him house trained because we started so late. However dogs have an inbuilt instinct not to foul their living quarters (You can see it with very young puppies crawling out of their nest). Going back to our puppy... I carried on taking him out every time I would come home from work, shops etc. He was over a year old when I finally realised I am doing the work my son promised me he would do (and those 10-15 minutes were adding up). It took our Cockapoo 2-3 weeks to adjust his behaviour and expectations. He sleeps in my son's bedroom and used to scratch and jump out as soon as I come out of my bedroom. Now he sleeps for another 1-2 hours sometimes longer. If he does come out he isn't expecting a walk. Same with me coming home from work. He expects a belly rub, not a walk. What I would suggest in your situation don't feed your dog after 6 pm. No need to remove water. Take her out for 10-15 minutes between 9 and 10 pm. Then put up with her whining for as many nights it would take for the whining to stop. My mum used to say dogs have an intelligence of a 2 year old child. I agree. Some 2 year olds are more stubborn than others. I would say it would take no more than 1-2 weeks to get your dog out of her bad habit. You might see an occasional accident. However I doubt it very much if she is otherwise house trained. I hope it helps

You shouldn’t be removing water.
Are there any cats/foxes/car doors slamming/boiler clicking on etc that is disturbing her ?
Do you have black out blinds on the windows/doors ?
Hopefully as the longer nights arrive she will sleep better.

That’s still a very young dog, and it’s likely that they genuinely need the toilet. If you ignore them they will shit indoors…

We crated overnight until she was a year old (with a last minute wee and poo walk). Never a mess and she still sleeps though the night now with free roam of the whole house .

Crate training takes time,effort and resolve though. Has other benefits like stopping separation anxiety, calming location, safe retreat/comfort spot but might be to be too late for a 6m old

Please don't take water away from your puppy. She should have access to it 24/7 - it's a basic right.

It sounds to me like she is craving company and reassurance - if you won't have her upstairs with you then maybe someone should be sleeping downstairs with her instead.

Ours slept fine until about 6 months, was up barking in the middle of the night. Would go for a wee if we let them out but we think it was a combination of hormones kicking in and being disturbed by outside noises like foxes. We bought a white noise machine and turned that on overnight and they slept soundly again! Was a savour!

She might be coming into season, that can irritate their bowel/bladder.

My puppy was and is an amazing sleeper. She went 10 hours by 4 months. How? Because she slept in our room. They need company. She is not allowed upstairs otherwise. Just to sleep. It’s off limits the rest of the time.

You’ve got two choices. Carry on as you are or take her to your room. Ours was crated until she went thorough the night then penned onto one side. She still sleeps with us at a year old as well, it works! Over time we’ll move her out but she’s got a season then spay to come.

Like a lot of humans they wake THEN need the loo. Not the other way around.

I dont think you do only have two choices. My dogs who are loved to bits do not ever come upstairs and no dogs in my bedroom ever! They all sleep well and have done from an early age.

At 6 months most dogs would be sleeping through the night some may be waking at at 6.30 ish but that is fine if you have had undisturbed sleep at night.

Dont take her water away from her ever. Interesting a dehydrated dog will need to wee lots of small wees and may feel like they are weeing more.

I would not feed earlier but maybe feed later. So if the dog does need a poo it may be pushed to morning and they are not waking up hungry.

Check simple things like there are enough blankets etc and the dog is not too hot or too cold.

How often does the dog poo in the daytime?
Where does the dog sleep in the daytime?
Is the dog happy being left on their own for a short period in the daytime?

We gave in at 6 months and pup came and slept with us. We'd tried so many different things prior, in the crate, out the crate, music on, music off, light on, white noise etc. First night she slept with us she slept 10pm - 8am and has done pretty much ever since.

The lack of sleep before that nearly broke me.

Dogs are individuals. Some will cope and some will not. Our last dog was fine on her own from 8/9 months (we adopted her at 6 months) but current one is only just learning to be ok. I do think if you have multiple dogs it makes a difference too. They are never truly alone whereas a singleton they are.

At the end of the day if you have tried everything else and the dog isn't coping then it depends if you want to sleep again or not. Personally I need sleep to function so I am happy to have another presence in the bedroom for as long as it takes to achieve that. It doesn't make them clingy. Ours is an independent and confident little madam and in no way clingy.

When my 9 month old pup falls asleep downstairs she wakes and barks a few times at whatever she can hear outside. When she sleeps in my room from the start of the night I don't hear a peep from her. If your pup can't go upstairs I'd probably sleep downstairs with them. They're social animals. Sure, some are OK alone, but your pup doesn't sound very settled to me, and the need for the toilet might be a side effect of being properly awake due to not being settled rather than being woken up needing to go. Sleeping downstairs is surely worth a try if you're very sleep deprived.

@Newpeep Dogs are individuals. Some will cope and some will not. Our last dog was fine on her own from 8/9 months (we adopted her at 6 months) but current one is only just learning to be ok. I do think if you have multiple dogs it makes a difference too. They are never truly alone whereas a singleton they are.

At the end of the day if you have tried everything else and the dog isn't coping then it depends if you want to sleep again or not. Personally I need sleep to function so I am happy to have another presence in the bedroom for as long as it takes to achieve that. It doesn't make them clingy. Ours is an independent and confident little madam and in no way clingy.

I totally agree that all dog are individuals but it always makes me smile that dogs are family, social animals and have to sleep with their owners. Great Uncle Pete is also family and very social as is my teenage son but I dont want them in my bedroom at night!

The OP does not want the dog in her room and that is fine, there are 100s of reasons why this may not be right for many people. I am on kidney dialysis and there is no way my dogs can be in the room whilst that is happening over night.

They have all been encouraged to be happy and confident to sleep in their own areas. They were not stressed at all and no times did they cry as the way they were encouraged to get used to this was stress free for them and us.

I feel it is a good life skill for dogs to be confident and happy to spend time alone - we may not always be there for them.

I disagree that the only options are cry it out alone or be in the OP bedroom.

Not relevant in the OP case but I do have a multi dog household but puppies always have their own sleeping area.

Further to my earlier post... my method is very similar to controlled crying for babies and toddlers who wouldn't settle themselves to sleep. If it's legal and acceptable for human children than it should be acceptable for dogs. Unlike humans, dogs have a keen sense of hearing . You dog will be aware that she woke up the entire household with her whining, barking etc. Dogs love being with humans, that's true. However they will accept living outside in a kennel if they have to. At the moment you are constantly reinforcing unwanted behaviour because you are worried your dog might genuinely need a wee or poo. This is not the case. If you are in any doubt speak to your dog's vet

They don't have to - my last one didn't and she had no signs of SA. The current one won't hopefully once we get around to moving her out but this pup isn't settled whatever happens so the OP needs to spend time settling it down where they want it to sleep and building a decent foundation however long that takes, or move it with them until it gains confidence.

Situations vary and my house set up is such that having pup upstairs is much easier. But bottom line, pup isn't sleeping, is disrupting the house and learning that nightimes are awake times so that needs to change in whatever way is appropriate for that set up.

@Newpeep not sure I understand your last post but I think we are agreeing that all dogs are different, different methods work for different dogs, and it is vital to get a dog comfortable to sleep at night.

I differ from you in that there are more methods to achieve this than having a dog sleeping in the op bedroom which they dont want and will not work for their household

My dog sometimes needs to go to the toilet at night (for poos only) and it always happens when he's anxious because of some minor changes, such as having guests around.
So maybe your girl has some anxiety as well? Think about what could be happening during the day that could trigger some anxiety.

Also, what do you do when she needs to go to the toilet at night?
I remember a dog training podcast where someone had a similar issue with an adult dog, and it turned out that the dog was actually having a great time in the yard at night, running, playing a bit, so the behaviour was reinforced each night.
The owner finally broke the habit by making the night toilet break as boring as possible. On the lead, almost no interaction, in and out and back to bed. Quickly the dog was sleeping through the night because there was nothing exciting happening at night.

My dog kept waking at night and I took him to the toilet. He always had a wee but it was killing me. I started to tell him go back to bed and after 2 nights he was fine and sleeping through.