13 week old puppy not sleeping at night

[Mypuppywontsleep]

username doesn’t explain the levels of tired we are experiencing.

13wo female cockerpoo with separation anxiety. We have tried wearing her out with puzzles, play, exercise, mental agility. She’s healthy, eats fairly well, no toilet issues. We have tried variations of low soft music, white noise, darkness, a night light, clothes that smell of us - everything!

We have a crate which she likes, goes into of her own accord and if you are in the room and close the crate door she will settle down. She has her own area at night for sleeping.

If you leave the room whilst she is in or out of the crate she will cry and whine over and over for hours. We have tried leaving her, tried going back, tried sitting silently afar from her, tried putting inside the crate or inside a larger pen with crate door open. We have tried different beddings, taking her to the toilet everything. She just cries and barks relentlessly.

Last night she would not settle till 4am and was back up at 6am. She must be SO tired. We tried ignoring her but she did not get fed up with crying and got louder.

We are at our wits end. She is such a lovely pup, I think we are both a bit soft and hate hearing her cry but not giving in and bringing her into the bedroom as we decided no dogs in bedrooms. Our previous dog hogged the bed and we didn’t get any sleep that way either!

Help!

Ask him if he'd like a nice stable family dog, not pre disposed to anxiety or fear who is easy to take out and about and enjoy. Or one who needs a lot of work and counter conditioning, cheerleading and managing because they didn't get the security they needed JUST by letting them sleep in the same room as you for a few months?

That's about it really. Yes some dogs are fine on their own. Lots are not. Anxiety is like whack a mole. You suppress it somewhere and it pops up somewhere else! And he has chosen a mix which needs a lot of support usually to be ok on their own.

I agree. DH needs to take on board that she is a thinking, intelligent creature, not a desk ornament.

How bigs her crate? she needs a small crate with a blanket over the top. Put the crate in a room where it's going to stay. Either leave the tv on or a radio. She's going to cry but it will only be for 2/3 nights she will eventually get the message. Don't bother putting the crate in your room because you'll just have the same problem when you put her back downstairs.

And why is your DH getting his way in all of this?

Just take her upstairs in the crate! What is he going to do about it? If he's that bothered then he can go and sleep downstairs by himself. 🤷🏼‍♀️ I honestly wouldn't be listening to my puppy cry all night because DH is being a stubborn arse. I'd also find it massively unattractive that he's being so cruel to a puppy.

My pup is one now, she slept by my bed in a sectioned off area since day one. She would wake up between 5-6am for a cuddle, she'd get on my bed and sleep on my arm until the alarm went off. She only ever had one night where she had a wee (obviously not on my bed) and she's not been getting on my bed for months now either. Sleeps in her own bed the whole night.

Sleep is so important, you do what's necessary because it makes the relentless puppy days easier.

Our cavapoo is 10 weeks old and been with us for 2 weeks. I made a bed on the floor next to mine but she has slept in our bed from day one along with our older dog. She'll sleep 10pm to 6am. I couldn't cope with listening to her crying all night bless her. They are separated from their pack into this strange family and home. Please try and bring her crate up to the bedroom.

This is good

She is a good pup. She’s super tired around 8pm so I tried to keep her up a little longer so she will sleep tonight. I am still badgering DH. Hopefully tonight will go well and it will all be fine!

I am still badgering DH.

Not good enough.

You TELL your husband what is best for the puppy.

What is happening now is that it's become a power play for him that he wants to win. He doesn't care about the puppy, or what is right for puppy, he just wants to win, hence;

He is getting cross with her barking and crying and telling her off and I keep telling him she is just a baby, don’t be unfair to her she doesn’t understand it.

He sounds horrible. Poor puppy.

I completely agree with this. We’re on our third dog and we’ve never had one upstairs with us. They do settle down, I think you just have to make things as cosy and as comfortable as possible and then stick to a routine. They are not human babies. They are ready to leave their mothers at around nine weeks.

How was it @Mypuppywontsleep?

We tried all this. There is nothing we haven’t done. Podcasts white noise classical music all of it. Her crate is nice and has a blanket. She likes it. She just doesn’t want to be alone. It’s not 2-3 nights, it’s weeks now.

Well 2nd night of zero crying and 6 hours solid sleep in closed crate in bedroom. I am still so tired from the lack of sleep of late though I will talk to DH again as he’s currently worrying she hasn’t drunk much

I have a cocker spaniel he didn't drink much well I didn't think so I used to put some water in his food. You will catch uo oh sleep eventually puppies are "like" real babies and it's constant,

Sorry, but that's the solution and if he's unwilling to solve the problem, let him sleep next to the crate then. 🤷‍♀️

All sorted puppy now in bedroom in crate, slept from 9pm to 5am! I got her up to go to the toilet at 5 then she went back to sleep! No crying at all

she has even learnt to sit on command already. She’s a lovely little bubba ❤️

Could you have her just outside the bedroom so she can hear yoy sleeping?
This what what we did for our Basset who was wandering around at night clearly not sleeping.

The moment he was allowed by the door (Staircase across the bedroom door) he slept through.

Her wee is much smaller and coloured now we stopped adding water to food but I might start again.

Ah I'm pleased to see he relented.

We will be gradually moving the crate out slowly. For now she is sleeping perfectly (can’t believe it!) settling down and staying down all night even when we stir

That’s brilliant news.

You really don’t need to worry about her not drinking enough. No dog denies itself water so as long as fresh water is available at all times (including overnight in her crate) she will make sure she gets enough.

Try and relax and enjoy her now that she is sleeping through the night.

She always knocks it over in her crate. So this is something we need to work on. Do you think the rabbit style ones are a good idea?

In crates I’ve always used the stainless steel bowls that fit inside a wire rim that attaches to the crate wall but you can buy specific non-tip bowls in pet shops or online. Or just use a heavy ceramic bowl or one that is heavy and wider at the bottom than the top.

Thanks! We will sort this out!
amazing what some sleep can do for you all I feel like a new woman (or human). DH isn’t a bastard I think he just has some unrealistic expectations 🤭

I slept on a mattress next to pup in his crate for the first few nights and gradually moved further away. He was quiet all night after about 3 nights and I was back upstairs after 2 weeks. Tbh I probably could have gone back up after a week but I wanted to be sure he was ok. It's also useful to be close for outside night trips!!