Advice for a nervous rescue dog

[SilverTotoro]

We’re just about to adopt our second dog who is very nervous / shy - she’s basically a bit scared of her own shadow and has obviously been through a fair bit of trauma and is quite closed down.

We’ve done visits and she’s gradually getting used to us which is lovely.

The rescue centre and foster family have been great in terms of talking through her routine and giving us tips, but I thought the more advice we could get the better.

I’d be really grateful if anyone who has adopted a similarly nervous dog would share their advice with me for settling them into a new home and building up confidence and trust.

Give her space, don't crowd her. Talk to her but give her distance. Be gentle and soft when you talk to her. Be patient and let her have time, for example if opening the door for her to go in the garden.
Feed her separately to your other dog.
Good luck!
Hopefully when she realises you are a friend she will relax and given a few days, then weeks, you will see a difference.

You need to be super patient and really scale things back for her - don't expect to go out for big walks or cafe visits, don't have people round, and go at her pace.
Enforce a 'her space' with all humans banned from there, and let her come to you. When she does come, don't get all excited and OTT, keep it quiet and peaceful.
If you have DC, no screaming, shouting, running round inside, no waving anything around or raising hands up and so on.
Introduce people very slowly and find her ultimate treat so that you can work on giving others her treat so she meets new people as a good thing.
Where does she sleep? She might sleep startle if very anxious so you'll need to be super careful on that

Hello OP.

You're doing a wonderful thing - well done, thank you and congratulations.

I rescued a nervous dog about seven years ago. It's fundamentally pretty simple - they need love and patience. But how you give that needs some thinking about.

Learn her triggers. What is it that makes her nervous? Loud noise? Sudden noise? Unexpected movement? Weird objects? Particular people? This will take time but learn these things and mitigate them by either removing them completely or training her to get used to it and being brave.

More generally, here's what I'd advise based on my own experiences:

• Give her lots of space
• Ask for her consent whenever you touch her
• Go slowly when you touch her - gently stroke her chest area first, never the top of her head or her back where she can't see what you're doing
• Be quiet around her for a good few weeks as much as you can
• Talk to her almost constantly in a soft, quiet, kind voice. This works especially well as reassurance on walks (yes, you'll look like an idiot) and as she's dropping off to sleep
• If you can take her on walks, take her places where there's unlikely to be drama which will freak her out
• If you can take her on walks, don't take her too far from home yet. Let her get used to the local area around her new home before you venture too far.
• Whenever she does something good, reward her. If she's brave when the door knocks, reward her. If she goes to do a wee in the garden, reward her. If she meets another dog nicely, reward her.
• Decide on and stick to words which you'll use consistently with her to ask her what she wants, to tell her what to do, to tell her she's been a good girl etc. Stick to these words and always follow them with the same actions. Consistency will help build her confidence because she'll figure out how to communicate with you.
• Sit on the floor lots so she can come and explore you and be with you at her level.
• Be mindful of things that you might think of as being harmless/everyday but which she might be absolutely terrified of. Just try to put yourself in her shoes and think about how the world might look/feel to her.
• Be prepared for everything to take four times as long as usual because you might need to keep taking breaks to reassure the dog about things. Bake this time into whatever it is you're doing.

Is she house trained?

You having a dog already will really help her build her confidence and see that you're safe and decent humans. But it might also be an idea to arrange a walk with another canine friend in a few weeks too just to keep assuring her that you're good people.

It might take time but you'll get there. But you should bear in mind that there might be some things that your girl will never be okay with and will always be nervous of. These things won't become clear for years once she's okay with everything else. Don't sweat it - life can easily be adapted around these things.

For example, our dog loves the gas fire on in the winter but we have to put it on when she's out on a walk because she hates the bang of the ignition.

She's also petrified of a local poo bin - no idea why, its exactly the same as all the other poo bins but she hates this one for some reason. So we don't walk past that poo bin, very easy to adapt the route.

I should've said that we will need pictures and updates, please!

Thank you for all your advice it’s very much appreciated, really looking forward to bringing our new family member home soon and working to build up her confidence. She does go on walks so we’re just working out a couple of local routes with minimal roads as she does find car noise scary. I’ll also be stocking up on chicken which is a firm favourite!

Space, peace and quiet, gentle love on her terms and time :-) Make sure she has a place that is all hers... preferably enclosed and dark ish so she has her own safe space where she can go for peace but where she can still peep out and observe you all.

Good luck x

A yellow harness and a yellow coat with keep your distance on it. No matter how much you tell people not to approach, lean over or talk to you dog, so many of them think the are some sort of magic dog whisperer.

Not everyone is aware of the significance of a yellow harness and coats. I have even had parents ask if their kids can pet her. Despite the wording being In large black letters. I used to explain about her nervousness. Then watch as they bend down to her no say ‘ooo are you nervous’,. Now I just say “She bites”.

She did improve but was never fully relaxed so I was always hyper-vigilant.

I got my harness and flash coat from D for DOG.

We have this lead, but not everyone sees it, so I’d get a jacket too. https://amzn.to/3N2k6ci

Ours has a crate with no door and a blanket over, which she really likes. We never put a hand in there so it’s her space.

Can i follow? Just brought home a rescue and going slowly

Everything everyone here has said. Love, patience and time. My rescue dog has stress chewed when left but is perfect when with me. She’s still the same now so lots of toys, chews etc if I need to nip out. I work from home so she’s usually with me. She is still scared of strangers and a hand going to stroke her so I avoid this with people when they try. She’s turned out into a wonderful, trusting family dog who comes on horse rides with me around our fields (at my side loose not on my horse with me!). With those who are close to us she trusts. I couldn’t have wished for a better companion. She’s been my hardest rescue I’ve had because of her previous beatings but by goodness probably my most rewarding (although I love them all). Good luck and enjoy. You are doing an amazing thing OP.

Yay, here it is :-)

We adopted a serbian rescue last year. I'm not going to lie....he's mental! Haha.
For us it was dependent on the animals already in our home and my two 8 year old dogs have always been very welcoming of any animal into their home so I knew that part would go well. And it did. He's just now a part of a trio. But even after 9 months he is still very skitzy and jumpy. He likes to lie upstairs on his own. The other 2 lie downstairs with me. He will not be picked up. I can't cut his claws or hold him by his stomach. Took us weeks to get a collar on him without a 10 minute chase and discussion. He still hides under the bed and yelps in fright even if I just tell him off in a normal voice. He did not know what stairs, tv, mirror, door threshold were. So it was quite extreme for us. But he's going nowhere. He's just different and quirky. I would say just remember they aren't the same and may never be. So make sure you're still taking it on for life and it may be just a bit different from the life you expect...
You sound prepared. Good luck!

The only thing I'd add to the already excellent advice you've been given, is if you have friend/s round, let them sit quietly somewhere, and let your new dog come to meet them in her own time, at her own pace. It may just be a sniff hello to start with, and work up from there. I wish you all the best with her.

Again thank you everyone -it’s lovely hearing those positive stories. I’m going to order one of the yellow jackets and there’s a little nook in our living room I can make into a suitable quiet space Im also planning a trip to our local pet shop this weekend to pick up everything else she might need.

We should have known what we were in for as she destroyed 3 chew toys on the way home from the rescue. Definitely buy chew toys of the best quality. Even small dogs have a ferocious chew capacity.

Dogs feed off your energy…… if it takes longer than expected (and it probably will) don’t be hard on yourself.

We got ours 3 years ago, she’s amazing now but the odd thing still worries her… but the braver I am the better she is. Everything we’ve overcome has needed to be broken down into tiny bits (car training took us 3 months of daily sessions. We started with sitting on the drive having a picnic… but now! Car = long walk so she sometimes pulls me over to it when I intended a local walk! Patience pays off)

The energy thing is such a good point.

My rescue used to be really nervous of bin wagons we'd encounter on our walks. I tried switching up my energy to be very calm and confident as we went past but she was still very unsure. So after a while I started basically skipping past every one we saw singing "Who's a brave little girl" which used to get her all excited so she'd forget about being nervous. Then, once we were some distance on, I'd give her a big love and lots of treats.

It took several months and its fair to say that the local binmen got to know me quite well. But now she's fine with bin wagons. In fact, she fucking loves them because she knows she gets big love and treat (I don't do singing and skipping any more, much).

It took 10 months for my rescue collie to fully settle in - so don’t expect too much too soon!