To get the puppy or not

[TennyTroo]

I'd really appreciate objective opinions as I'm going around in circles.

I am semi experienced with dogs, I've fostered a few, but all adults, never had a puppy.

I've done a lot of research and can see that getting a puppy means investing a lot of time and effort into training. I've read all the guides on the Facebook group often mentioned here.

My situation - I'll be moving into a new house in mid February. Rural, loads of space, couple of acres. I'd love a dog for company as DH is works shifts a lot, and I'm very active with running and walking.

Puppy will be ready for pick up 1st March. So issue 1 - is it too soon after making this big move from city to country?

Issue 2 - DH is autistic and struggles with change. He'd love a puppy but ill be the main care giver.

Issue 3 - I don't want to feel trapped in the new house; I'll be adjusting to rural life and worried the responsibility of the puppy may be a negative and not a positive aspect, tying me to the house

Questions - am I overthinking this? I'm wondering how long I'll need to sleep downstairs with the pup to help him settle, how long it'll take to build him up to be left 1/2 hours, how much of my day will be dictated to his routine, how much sleep I'll lose with regular garden loo trips, etc

The thing is, the pup is being bred by a close friend, it's only because she wants a puppy from her dog. She bred her before (same reason) and the pups are all amazing -- great temperaments, top health, and the breed is exactly right for us.

What would you do?

No, give yourself a year to adjust to your new lifestyle first.

Then bring in the puppy if you still want one.

The puppy won't be ready for going on runs/lengthy walks for some time.

How do you know all the previous pups are amazing/ in good health ? Are you building this pup into something that can't possibly be guaranteed as the previous litter will presumably be too young for a lot of health issues to have emerged ?

If your friend wasn't offering up these pups, is it a breed you would have considered ?

Why the change from rescue dogs to a puppy ?

If the timing feels off, then it's going to make the puppy period more difficult. If you have concerns, why rush - you don't need a puppy from this particular litter. There will be other puppies at a time when you are more settled.

If you're happy with your responses to the above, then your concerns might very well just be over thinking it. Not all puppies are little shits but it's more than likely so plan for that and remember that all the early work you put in will pay off in time.

I would get the puppy, you are overthinking. If you get the puppy used to a crate they will soon settle down.

once they have had all their vaccinations you can start with short walks. You will discover all the dog walking places and meet other dog owners. What we did when we moved.

I agree to waiting. Get the house sorted, and get used to your new home first. Dogs, and in particular puppies, are VERY tying.

You are overthinking. We got a puppy the day after moving* to new house. It was a renovation project so meant any accidents on carpets wasn’t a major problem. It was a great way to meet people once she was allowed out, everyone loves a puppy.

you are tied to the house for the first 12 weeks or so….not all the time but you can’t go far if you are housetraining. And they won’t be able to do long runs or walks for a while. Also you’ll need a secure garden. And countryside walks aren’t always great for dogs, sheep, livestock, busy roads etc….

we’ve lots of beaches and glens that are ideal.

I can see both sides.

If it truly is a friend that is breeding and not an acquaintance and you have seen mum and previous puppies then I can certainly see the advantages. Also your life is in change anyway so the puppy won't be changing established routines.

But, puppies are a lot of work and if you have anything you need to do to the new house then it might be better to wait.

It's genuinely a friend, and know the mum dog very well. From the last litter a WhatsApp group was made so the owners all keep in touch and the litter meet once a year! That litter was 3 years ago.

Lots of rennovation needed to the new house, this is another factor.

I want to prioritise what's right for the puppy, not just what fits in my life.

The beauty of renovation and a puppy was it was great for socialising her. Loud noises don’t phase her, she met lots of people, and anything she chewed or weeed on was probably going anyway.

You say acres and loads of space but will you have an enclosed garden/area?

But realistically you will be somewhat tied to the house initially, especially if your DH isn't onboard with training.

And my number one regret was not finishing off loads of little DIY jobs before we got the pup as it's so much more difficult to do afterwards, so how much are you intending to be involved in the renovations?

No enclosed area at all; there's stock proof fencing but I wouldn't say puppy proof. Gaps in hedging. Would need to fence an area, this is partly why I'm thinking a puppy rather than rescue dog, as I wouldn't meet the rescue requirements (fully secure to 6ft).

Other than that, pup on a very long line lead for exploring in the garden - he'd need to be supervised anyway and would incorporate training!

I would wait until you're settled in before getting a puppy.

Some puppies might find renovations and lots of guests a breeze - for others it's incredibly stressful and they'll be desperate for a quite place to go off and nap and/or decompress.

I'd also worry about doors potentially being left open and the puppy doing a runner and getting lost or worse, hit by a car. It can happen in a flash.

How can you overthink a relationship that will last 15 years and tie up so much of your time and money?
If you are not sure, wait. There are other puppies..

Cons to getting a dog -
Dog poo
Walks everyday regardless of weather
Increased costs -food toys etc
Vet bills
Training - constant with a puppy and needs to be consistent from all adults
Chewing
Biting /mouthing
Jumping up
Limited to where you can go or how long to leave dog
Kennels fees

This is someone who “wants a litter” from their dog but has done so before. So a backyard breeder?
Decent breeders choose a stud dog very carefully? Did they? Dogs need certain a breed specific specialist tests done prior to breeding. (Eyes, hips, heart etc) Were they? If not then run a mile.
I would wait TBH. Settle in. Have the work done and then see how you feel. And either rescue or good breeder if you decide to go for it.

1. That’s very individual, for me that’d be pretty bad timing though.
2. It is a huge change in routine and just after another huge change...also, unless he’s spent time with puppies it’s not a given that he’ll like them. My DS has autism, he was a teenager when we got the only little puppy we’ve ever had, he hated it. He couldn’t cope at all with all the mouthing, he basically decamped to his bedroom for about 4 months.
3. You will be pretty tied to the house for months.

I would get the puppy personally. Great way to meet new people in a new area.

You know the breeder and are happy with the breeding and health tests that would be a biggy for me. It can take ages to find the correct breeder.

Your house is not pristine again quite good for a puppy.

You will be tied to the house with some renovations going on - your life is also restricted with a puppy may as well do it at the same time.

You will of course have to make adjustments like secure area or secure room for the puppy but that should be ok to sort out with gates and fences etc

I cant comment on the impact of your son but you are considering that so that could be a deal breaker

However I am a dog person and always had multiple dogs so a new puppy is not a major life change for me - I guess a first timer would find it harder

We have a new puppy. She’s utterly adorable and has settled amazingly well. She’s the third puppy that we’ve had.

I absolutely disagree with the advice to sleep with a puppy, either downstairs or upstairs. It’s completely unnecessary. We made her crate into a soft warm bed with a cuddly toy and a blanket smelling of mum and the other pups. She has an electric blanket to keep her warm. We also have a dog cam, so if she’s at all upset we know immediately. As it turns out, she loves her crate and goes into it every time she’s tired or if something like the scary hoover comes out.

House training is so much easier with a crate and it’s going really well for our puppy. You do have to go outside frequently to start with and you have to watch them for signs but they soon get the hang of it.

You can read any old rubbish on the internet but it’s not as complicated and difficult as some make out. From the start do what suits you, be kind, be consistent and enjoy your puppy.

We never slept downstairs with our puppy, he had a crate from day one. He cried first night for 10 minutes, then slept till 3.30 am. Next night no crying and slept till 4 am. He was directly under us so I could hear when he woke up. Chewing was really bad, carpets, coffee table, chairs, basically anything. All our furniture was over 20 years old so we weren’t too bothered, we waited a year and got new stuff. Enclosing your garden will have to be a priority, you won’t want to put a long lead on every time puppy wants to go out, maybe you could have a smaller section safe for puppy to go out, like I say you could be letting puppy out up to 40 times a day and accidents happen if door is left open by someone, our garden was also ruined by digging and pulling up every plant we had. Our dog is nearly 5 years old, I am at home and we have a routine that mainly is set around the dog. When he was left on his own, we started with 5 minutes in crate then gradually worked up the amount of time left. Personally I think getting a puppy when you move is a good idea, especially if the house needs renovating.

I'm leaning more towards no.

I think it's going to take enough energy settling myself and supporting DH with the change of the house move.

Really appreciate the replies, thank you

I would wait for several reasons.

Firstly, puppies take a lot of hard work. You have to keep an eye on them constantly at first when they’re awake, to ensure they’re not up to mischief etc.

Puppies can’t really go out until their, second injection, usually twelves weeks.

Exercise is limited at first. As a guide, five minutes for every month of age. So walks will be limited (although you do chat to lots of new people).

sleep deprivation was a real thing for us, along with puppy blues.