Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
The doghouse

If you're worried about your pet's health, please speak to a vet or qualified professional.

Original poster

Help please

52 replies

Mummytothearkbuilder · 30/11/2022 11:13

Hello everyone, I was hoping to get some help, advice or wisdom. We have just (on Monday) collected our pup. He is 9 weeks old and has joined us, our 2 children and 7 year old dog. He is doing well, toileting mostly outside or on a puppy pad, our children are besotted and our existing pooch adjusting really well. However - the puppy hates the crate - cries and howls constantly like nothing I’ve heard before and doesn’t stop. We go down and take him out to see if he needs the toilet but he doesn’t go, pop him back in and he cries - last night it went on for 2 hours and it just seemed cruel. We brought the crate up to our room, he still cried so we opened the door and he got straight out, laid on the floor and slept all night.

I need some help as my anxiety is sky high and I’m feeling very out of control (something that doesn’t do well for me). Should we keep going with the crate? Should we say no to it? Our older dog doesn’t have a crate.

Any help would be hugely appreciated.

OP posts:
Original poster
Mummytothearkbuilder · 01/12/2022 08:38

Thank you everyone for your replies. We didn't use the crate last night, it was in our room but he chose to sleep on the floor. He woke at 3am for a wee.

He is in full chewing mode now - wants to chew everything. I've told my husband and children how I'm feeling and they were all really understanding but the guilt of feeling this way is eating me up.

I appreciate so much you all taking the time to reply to me.

OP posts:
caramac04 · 01/12/2022 08:52

A crate is not essential but can be useful. Our puppy was very happy in the crate but as he is huge now he only goes in the crate in the car. My old dog tolerates sharing it with him as she loves trips out.
At night she sleeps on her bed next to my bed and he sleeps in the kitchen. If we go out they have the run of the house, I’d hope they’d scare the shite out of any potential burglar.
He, German Shepherd, has never chewed or damaged anything and she , Staffie, was a 6 month old rescue and only chewed one thing.
Here they are sharing a bed in a caravan, he is 14 months, she is 12 and 1/2 years.

Help please
thelobsterquadrille · 01/12/2022 11:53

Full on chewing mode is normally a sign of being overtired and not getting enough sleep.

The recommended amount for a puppy is about 20 hours a day so it's really important to make sure they nap.

momtoboys · 01/12/2022 14:25

thelobsterquadrille · 01/12/2022 11:53

Full on chewing mode is normally a sign of being overtired and not getting enough sleep.

The recommended amount for a puppy is about 20 hours a day so it's really important to make sure they nap.

This response is interesting to me. I would have thought (absolutely NOT a dog expert) that the reason a puppy chews is because they are not tired enough and needs more exercise. I learn something new every time I am on Mumsnet!

tabulahrasa · 01/12/2022 14:31

momtoboys · 01/12/2022 14:25

This response is interesting to me. I would have thought (absolutely NOT a dog expert) that the reason a puppy chews is because they are not tired enough and needs more exercise. I learn something new every time I am on Mumsnet!

Show quote history

Depends what kind of chewing...

Moping about, happen to find something that might be fun to chew, have a go and decides, yep, this is fun... probably bored.

Going from thing to thing to thing in a short space of time, probably overtired.

But also, some puppies are chewier than others anyway.

thelobsterquadrille · 01/12/2022 14:35

This response is interesting to me. I would have thought (absolutely NOT a dog expert) that the reason a puppy chews is because they are not tired enough and needs more exercise. I learn something new every time I am on Mumsnet!

There are lots of reasons for chewing but in puppies, that frantic, giddy chewing and biting behaviour is normally down to them being over-tired.

They need so much sleep when they're young and not much in the way of exercise. It's all about finding the right balance which can be impossible when they're fighting sleep like a hairy toddler Grin

Unforgettablefire · 01/12/2022 14:49

Whyisitsodifficult · 30/11/2022 21:54

Sod the crate! We never used to have crates! God knows why this has become a ‘thing’ that all new puppy owners must do. By all means have a safe area for your pup to rest in but shutting it in a crate is unnecessary in my opinion.

This. When did crating puppies become the done thing?
Op some dogs hate it, I tried it once and never again those cries broke my heart and I've heard of dogs snapping their teeth and breaking their jaws they get that frantic. Fair enough if the dog wants it for quiet time but to lock them in I feel is cruel. Dogs don't need to be locked in cages.

Nschotschi · 01/12/2022 18:49

I'd keep puppy out of the crate. But I'm not in the UK and over here they are actually illegal.

RedHelenB · 01/12/2022 18:59

Crates are a very modern fad. My puppy was in a basket with the blanket with his mums smell on it from coming home in the kitchen downstairs. Slept through from the off.

thelobsterquadrille · 01/12/2022 21:08

Nschotschi · 01/12/2022 18:49

I'd keep puppy out of the crate. But I'm not in the UK and over here they are actually illegal.

Where are you out of interest?

Original poster
Mummytothearkbuilder · 01/12/2022 21:09

Thank you for the continued replies - I'm reading them all and absorbing all the information. I'm based in the UK - East of England x

OP posts:
Nschotschi · 01/12/2022 22:18

thelobsterquadrille · 01/12/2022 21:08

Where are you out of interest?

Show quote history

I'm in Germany and they've changed the animal protection laws recently. It's quite strict now, but I think that's great. You are only allowed to put a dog in a cage/crate for transportation and/or medical reasons.

userxx · 01/12/2022 22:23

@Nschotschi Really ? That's great news.

I've never caged any of my dogs, they've been perfectly happy in their own beds.

StopTalkingAndListen · 01/12/2022 22:28

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn at the user's request.

thelobsterquadrille · 02/12/2022 06:27

Thanks @Nschotschi that's really interesting.

I've never crated my dog and I don't see that it's necessary unless (like you say) for medical needs or transport.

tabulahrasa · 02/12/2022 07:43

Nschotschi · 01/12/2022 22:18

I'm in Germany and they've changed the animal protection laws recently. It's quite strict now, but I think that's great. You are only allowed to put a dog in a cage/crate for transportation and/or medical reasons.

Show quote history

Is it like Finland where you’re not allowed play pens or to have them in a lead indoors as well?

just being nosy, lol

Nschotschi · 02/12/2022 11:16

tabulahrasa · 02/12/2022 07:43

Is it like Finland where you’re not allowed play pens or to have them in a lead indoors as well?

just being nosy, lol

Show quote history

They have to be kept in a "species-appropriate" way, which includes the ability to move around. So I guess play pens aren't allowed, although I've never heard of a play pen for dogs. I think they aren't common here.

MrsSkylerWhite · 02/12/2022 11:17

We abandoned our crate very quickly because she was lonely and miserable. Who wouldn’t be, away from mum? She soon settled happily at night with the cats.

can your pup sleep with your older dog?

Purplecatshopaholic · 02/12/2022 11:24

Ditch the crate - you will be happier and less stressed. They are not compulsory

CatherineNotSoMuch · 02/12/2022 11:37

I used a crate for my puppy but looking back I can't actually believe I did that. As PP's have said, it somehow became the standard advice. I won't be using one again.

tabulahrasa · 02/12/2022 11:50

Nschotschi · 02/12/2022 11:16

They have to be kept in a "species-appropriate" way, which includes the ability to move around. So I guess play pens aren't allowed, although I've never heard of a play pen for dogs. I think they aren't common here.

Show quote history

Some people use play pens sometimes as it gives more space but a puppy is confined to a safe area still.

For some chewy puppies it can be pretty much impossible to puppy proof a room, if you’ve even got one spare to do it.

Original poster
Mummytothearkbuilder · 02/12/2022 13:46

Thank you everyone. We have stopped the crate and he sleeps on the floor in our room.

I've had a complete emotional breakdown, not sure what's happened really but I don't feel good. Been to the GP x

OP posts:
Floralnomad · 02/12/2022 18:22

@Mummytothearkbuilder , hope you feel better soon 💐

FuckingHateRats · 02/12/2022 19:29

We brought our pup home at 9wks and have never had a crate. She just had a bed which was her own space.

I don't really understand the point of crates, but we were happy for her to nap on the sofa etc. It doesn't sound like your puppy is happy at all, which kind of defies the point of using one surely?

FuckingHateRats · 02/12/2022 19:30

Hope you're feeling better soon, poor you