Dog changed since DH left

[Cluckycluck]

DH left a few weeks ago. At first my dog was fine and normal but now she's I think she's trying to assert her dominance over me. Despite spending more time with me she was always more DH's dog. It's frustrating as she's usually such a lovely dog. She's always been anxious and until recently was a well trained dog. She's fine in the day but the evenings are getting to be quite difficult now.

Has anyone else experienced this at all?

Is it because she used to get the attention of two people, whereas it’s only one now ?
What is she doing that is bothering you ?

Sounds like she thinks there's an authority gap she must fill. Looking after the pack, if you will.

To start with stop her from getting up on any furniture and start exercising/walking and playing with her.

Try and hold your body in an authoritative way, strong and confident and keep calm.

As much walking together on a lead as possible.

Hopefully things will even out as she realizes you are a good leader for you both.

my husband’s in the military and went away for 7 months a couple of years ago. My dog definitely changed during that time. For example, he started refusing to get out of the car if we went anywhere, growling and barking it I tried to get him out. I spend more time with him, take him for walks etc but he’s always been more my husband’s dog so I’m sure it affected him.

Stop letting the dog sleep in your bed and climb on your furniture.

I know it sounds like I’m being flippant but I’m really not

consistently enforcing boundaries and shutting down as opposed to challenging and dominant behaviour is best.

what breed/sex?

Perhaps ddog is picking up on your emotions since your dh left.
And hence is feeling more anxious. I think it would help if you stuck to the exact routine as before he left. Dogs can be very sensitive to change. We read it as them trying to be more dominant, but in reality they just can't handle change,,and maybe feeling some separation anxiety. Has your dh noT been back to see ddog?

She's never been allowed on the furniture.

She is walked daily and gets lots of affection. During the day it's not an issue, it's evenings when DH would have been home that are an issue. It is then that she starts trying to get on the furniture and barking at me.

She's never been a barker. I've heard her bark more since DH left than in the entire 9 years we've had her. She's a staff and had her since a pup.

It probably doesn't sound like a huge issue but I want to correct the behaviour now before it becomes a big problem.

What are the behaviours you’re finding difficult?

Asserting dominance isn’t really a thing tbh, but she will more than likely miss a family member who is suddenly gone.

DH has been back and taken her on a few walks.

Routine is the same as it has always been bar DH not being here in the evenings. I've always been the one to feed her, walk her and generally take care of her.

She probably wants to sit next to you now you are on your own , she’s trying to care for you not dominate you . Dogs don’t know about dominance but they do pick up on moods and peoples feelings .

Main issue is her barking at me and jumping onto me when I'm on the sofa. She'll get on me and bark directly in my face. This is something she's never done before.

She’s missing her person. Dogs get very emotionally attached

is she staying with you full time or are you gonna to share time with her?

She'll be with me full time. DH will look after her when needed and possibly walk her. She's hates going in the car (always has) so it isn't practical to move her back and forth.

It’s most likely she’s missing him and it’s a change in her routine - because when someone comes in there’s a wee flurry of activity, usually some attention for the dog as well... and if she’s anything like mine that evening time is spent kind of going between me and DP getting attention in bits.

I’d go for giving her something to do just before that time where she’s doing the attention seeking behaviour. A kong or chew or something along those lines.

She's missing one of her people.
Is she getting less excercise, less
play, less attention?

She's communicating to you :

"Where the hell is he? Is he coming today? "

"I can feel you're emotionally upset but I'M HERE FOR YOU"
and I'm lonely too"

Could you ask ex to come to walk her more often in evenings until she gets used to you and her.

Walking her in the evening isn't an option. Dog doesn't like the dark. She finds it stressful so I've always walked her during the day to reduce the stress for her.

She's trying to tell you that she's missing your DH and that she's there for you.

She wants to sit with you and cuddle you and get some reassurance. Is there a reason she can't come up on the sofa for a fuss?

She gets lots of fuss, she doesn't need to be on the sofa to have fuss. I tend to sit on the floor with her and give her cuddles.

Not being on the sofa is a boundary that has been set and I don't wish to change this.

The cat comes and sits on the sofa too so it's important that he has a space that he can come and spend time with me without the dog bothering him.

time..... i have a staffy too and ahuge mainecoon cat and 2 others when huband died the cat sat on the doorway to his room for4 weeks except for food and box.
the pup would sit in front of me talking at me and lots of it.
the othercats camped next to the backdoor waiting for him to come home broke my heart spent about3 months over loving them ok now but hard ............. time

I totally agree. I lost my DH in January, and both my dogs have been very unsettled. They started by growling at each a lot, which they'd never done; being mother and son. Now they're just very clingy, constantly following me everywhere I go. I hope you get yours sorted out.