Getting older puppy to bed at night is a nightmare

[ClaireandTed]

Please someone tell me this is normal and will end!

Getting my ten month old puppy to sleep at night is a major task taking hours, she is waaaayyyyy worse than my child ever was.

We know she's exhausted as she sleeps in each morning till ten am so there's no point giving her a later bedtime. She sleeps in our bedroom.

From about six pm she becomes destructive, difficult, whiny etc. She always has a nice long evening walk at about seven pm, is home by eight pm, she then usually goes and sits in the garden but soon starts barking at stuff so we bring her in, then we let her out as the garden is her favourite place, she barks again, etc etc. Eventually, around nine, after we've had.dinner while trying to stop her being a nightmare, we take her upstairs.

When upstairs we lie on the bed to try to calm her down. She barks at the bedroom door, scrapes at the floor, pants, is a total pain. We occasionally let her downstairs just in case she needs the loo again but she never does.

We've tried everything, wind down routines, things to chew (they hype her up more), even puppy massage and nothing works. Eventually she just gives up and collapses around ten o'clock but we are totally fed up.

Surely we won't have to spend every evening for the rest of our lives battling like this?

And yes - she gets lots and lots of exercise, stimulation, training, toys, cuddles,attention, the lot.

I just want to know if she will grow out of it eventually 🤞🤞

Also - she's not food orientated at all, so lickimats, snufflemats, Kongs etc are either ignored or tried for a bit and don't calm her down.

Hmm. Am not massively dog-experienced but no, to me, this does not actually sound either ideal (understatement) or within my limited experience. At 10 months old most dogs are either adolescent or young adults, no longer wee puppies.

What happens earlier in the day, re company, mental stimulation, off-lead walks? What food, and when? Is it very high protein? What breed of dog?

I will say that if I exercised my working breed dog at 7pm she would be bananas hyperactive and stealing random items till 10 at least. Much better behaved with exercise earlier in the day.

My 1 year old vizsla would behave this way if we let him. We are very firm with bedtime being at 8 and just keep guiding him back to his bed. He tries it on a couple of times before plonking himself down and letting out a whingy yawn/scream. Then he settles. Sounds to me you are pandering to her too much. You sound like a fab owner, just don't let her run rings around you.

Also it took me a long time to realise that dogs are very much like young children in that if you interact and stimulate the little gremlins, they just keep going Like bloody Duracell bunnies. If you sit in a boring room with them and be boring, bam, they conk out and leave you alone.

I would guess that garden/ outside is a place that your dog associates with fun, company, and interaction, and that is why she is barking out there and why she is clawing to get out the door. She knows inside is boring and where calm is expected. I know it's not popular but I think some tough love is sometimes warranted. If you are really boring indoors (no settling, coddling, singing or playing:))) she will soon get the message that nothing doing inside, now is the time to sleep. Basically, be much meaner

If she is destructive and whiny she is tired so dont bring her for another walk. No walks in evenings. No bringing upstairs- its a new stimulus. I would crate train and then use bed or place command until she is sharp on that. You are overmanaging it completely. Stop pandering. ( I will be kind and ignore the massage bit...)

She sounds overtired. Have a look at the guides at www.facebook.com/groups/dogtrainingadviceandsupport/?ref=share

They also have trained behaviourists on there to answer your questions once you've read the compulsory guides (all free of charge).

Crates are your friend and a safe space for your dog will benefit her, it may take time, she might complain, but she needs to learn that you know best.

Yeah. What @ThisisMax said. Be mean. Your problems will probably be over in a week. Dog massage is not a thing, honest. Generations of people have raised dogs and babies without elaborate pampering routines. I was a sucker for this a stuff, I've now decided it is all a load of shite

Had similar with my dog when he was about 7 months old. I used to put a house line on him and take him into a dark room with me then totally ignore him, I would gently hold the lead and not interact with him at all, just read my phone or kindle so didn't a light on. No toys, treats, nothing. Water if he needed it. He was overstimulated and very over tired. He would eventually after barking, crying, messing about, settle down at my feet. Just like a baby. Took a few weeks but he soon learnt evenings were for quiet time. It was very tough though, he was bitey too which made it worse.

He's nearly 18 months now and he's wonderful.

He goes to bed when we do, sleeps in my sons room, has a separate bed up there different to his daytime bed. I would drop the evening walk and the outside garden bit, like kids when you want them to settle, be calm and sleep you need to make it really boring.

She's over-tired and over-stimulated - the evening walk won't be helping. I would switch it out for some brain training and calming activities at home instead.

How much sleep does she get through the day? You say she gets lots of attention but I suspect this is the problem - she needs to
learn to be ignored and to be okay without constant fuss, play, attention and input from you.

Thanks! She's a Tibetan terrier, notoriously difficult as puppies and take a while to mature. Currently on kibble with about 25% protein, we are transitioning her to wet food mixed with cold pressed, a higher protein content.

I am home with her all day apart from school runs, we do a fifteen min toilet walk at about eleven and then an hour or so usually in the woods after lunch (some off lead). Then we do training and games in the garden but I do find that tricky as she's not food orientated.

Yes I think we started the later walk as she seemed so high energy...maybe my husband should take her out at about half five instead when he's home from work.

Thankyou! I know deep down you are totally right ha ha. My son was the easiest toddler ever and still is no trouble at nine, and I have found having a headstrong dog a massive shock despite preparing/research etc. I need to toughen up 🤣

Thanks 🤣 what about the massage, I won't take offence promise 🤣 am I being way too soft

🤣🤣🤣 there's so much online about how to get the perfect dog and lots of pressure. Just like babies!! Thankyou x

Thanks all, really helpful and there's definitely a consensus that I'm way too soft (true) and the evening walk is too late.

I'll make the walk earlier and try to toughen up....aaargh I'm so hard at being tough!

Thank you, I am definitely getting better at ignoring her during the day once she's had her walk/play etc, which really helps her settle, but yes in the evenings I pander to her too much.

She used to sleep a lot during the day in her crate but now I let her sleep on the sofa or the floor and she still is quiet for decent amounts of time but it's definitely less of a deep sleep.

I'm a no nonsense type of dog person, was brought up with big dogs from age five. The dog always slept in the kitchen, never allowed upstairs. The light went off, the dog went on its bed, parents went upstairs.
Sounds like the dog doesn't know who's in charge. Have you tried putting its bed in a dog cage at night downstairs?

I haven't yet. I kind of like her being upstairs although she does wake us up by changing where she lies during the night etc.

I know deep down its something I should consider.

PS she does have a crate downstairs which I used to use for school runs and sometimes still use if I have to be out a couple of hours. She used to sleep in a crate upstairs in our bedroom but then we just let her out so she switches between the floor and our bed.

Genuinely never heard of ‘putting the dog to bed’ - my two snooze off and on in the evening and then come up to bed when we do (they sleep with us). They sleep all night and mostly don’t want to get up in the morning - one is still sleeping now!

The only time I’ve walked mine before bed was during the warm weather, so it was cooler. But they’d be wild afterwards. They just have a morning and lunchtime walk usually. They are cockerpoos, so not a notoriously lazy breed.

I am soft on my dogs but have never heard of massaging them 😂

My puppy got shut in their bed in the kitchen when I went up to bed. Now she just gets shut on whichever downstairs room they've settled in when I go up. I must admit, I hate winter evenings when they go in and out of the garden all the time. I'm summer we can leave the doors open.

🤣 I've probably given the wrong impression by 'massaging', I was basically googling how to get a restless dog to settle and the evenings and this was a suggestion, it's more doing long strokes down the back, ears, etc. But yeah it doesn't work 🤣.

And before getting a dog I didn't know that 'putting.them to bed' was a thing either - which is why I am stressed that it seems to be the case with our puppy. But yes it does seem our evening walk is way too much! I'll change that and hopefully it will help 🤞🤞

The witching hour! Many puppies become hyper at that time of day. Yours is a bit old for that, but I see that you mention she's a breed that takes a bit longer to mature. They generally don't need more stimulation but more relaxation. So as PPs have said, do the last walk earlier and make it a calm, slow wander where she can sniff to her heart's content. I'd also avoid the garden in the evening since it seems to hype her up more.

I also wouldn't "put her to bed." I'd take her out for a wee one last time before you are planning to go to bed, then just do your own normal pre-bed routine but nothing specifically directed at the dog. She may find it too exciting to sleep in the bedroom with you, even if you like to have her there. Maybe experiment with having her sleep somewhere else in the house?