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Original poster

Sleep problems with dog-sitting. Please help!

36 replies

Puffalicious · 27/08/2022 20:11

Hi,

I'm looking for advice from you lovely, experienced dog owners. We have my sister's dog here for 4 nights- 16 month old Cavapoo bitch. She's just adorable and we love having her, but the sleeping is driving us bonkers.

We have her regularly for weekends and a week in June, and she loves being here - big, enclosed garden and 3DC to play with her- but things have gone awry recently. Sister and family started well with her sleeping in the kitchen, but this crept to her in their room and now at the foot of her bed. Their choice, but we're not into this ATALL! She whined so much in June we relented and she slept at the foot of our bed- but she started to creep up and after DH got up for work she would try and be on the pillow beside me! There's no way that's acceptable to me, as much as i love her. An overnight in July she became ill and vomited in 2 places all over the bedroom carpet. It was horrendous. One weekend after this my 2 teens turns to sleep on the sofa downstairs with her.

So, here we are now. Teens were not here and i refuse to be out of my bed, so last night we put her in our dining kitchen- she seemed very settled, but as the sunlight came in she whined and scratched so badly DH had to get up and sleep on the sofa there before she would settle.

What on Earth do we do? It looks like one of us need to sleep downstairs with her every time she's here? Teens again not here (weekend away) so it's my turn tonight! DH is shattered from last night and it's only fair, but it's not sustainable when we all have work/ school on Monday/ Tuesday.

Any advice/ solutions much appreciated.

OP posts:
bubblesandwineandallthingsfine · 27/08/2022 21:25

You are disrupting her routine and she misses her family….
map either keep to their routine, don’t have her or don’t whinge she’s upset her routine has changed

HickoryStump · 27/08/2022 21:31

Buy a cheap crate and pop it in your room? It's a compromise that may work, then probably say you'd rather not have her again.
Honestly, there are very few dogs I'm genuinely happy to have stay with us, they're used to their routine and their family and it's bloody annoying to upend family life for a dog that isn't yours!

pastaandpesto · 27/08/2022 21:37

If it is only four nights then I think you and DH will just have to take turns on the sofa. You might find it is less tiring if you just accept that is how it is going to have to be, rather than fighting it and then having to deal with the inevitable upset in the middle of the night.

Long term though, it sounds like your sister will just have to make other arrangements. Nothing wrong at all with having their dog in the bedroom if that works for them, but it doesn't work for you and it's clearly way too confusing for the dog.

lightisnotwhite · 27/08/2022 21:44

Even the ones that aren’t allowed upstairs, let alone in bed would be snuggled in a duvet with someone given half a chance. They are social creatures and love bundling in the warm as per their puppy days.
You can’t expect much in four days frankly. Dogs have no manners and don’t realise you are doing them a favour.

dustofneptune · 27/08/2022 21:50

The night time part of looking after someone else's dog is always tricky, as they get used to their routine and find it hard to sleep otherwise.

My dog sleeps in my bed, so if he stays with someone else overnight, they have to be happy to sleep with him (either in their own bed, or on the sofa, or an airbed, or whatever). Otherwise it just realistically doesn't work, because he'd keep them up all night barking.

I think in your case, the only option right now is to sleep with the dog, or get up ready for sunrise when she's waking up. Then just explain that you can't have her overnight, moving forward.

MyGirlDaisy · 27/08/2022 21:53

For the sake of everyone getting sleep I would just let her back upstairs again - does she have her own bed? If so you could put that in your room and put old towels on the floor to protect the carpet- but then I am a softie, my dog sleeps on our bed or in our room most nights. Her routine is disrupted so not really her fault.

Going forward your sister might have to make different arrangements though!

mountainsunsets · 27/08/2022 21:56

She needs to either sleep upstairs with you, or one of you needs to sleep downstairs with her.

There really is no other solution here. You knew she slept in the bed and agreed to have her overnight anyway 🤷🏻‍♀️ in the nicest possible way, what did you expect?

Original poster
Puffalicious · 27/08/2022 22:01

That's a little harsh. I love her to bits and I don't think I was whinging, certainly not to anyone in RL, but it's new to us and I was looking for some advice not admonishment for not being experienced!

OP posts:
Original poster
Puffalicious · 27/08/2022 22:02

Sorry, that was to bubblesandwine

OP posts:
Original poster
Puffalicious · 27/08/2022 22:02

HickoryStump · 27/08/2022 21:31

Buy a cheap crate and pop it in your room? It's a compromise that may work, then probably say you'd rather not have her again.
Honestly, there are very few dogs I'm genuinely happy to have stay with us, they're used to their routine and their family and it's bloody annoying to upend family life for a dog that isn't yours!

Thanks for acknowledging that it disruptive. It is!

OP posts:
Original poster
Puffalicious · 27/08/2022 22:03

pastaandpesto · 27/08/2022 21:37

If it is only four nights then I think you and DH will just have to take turns on the sofa. You might find it is less tiring if you just accept that is how it is going to have to be, rather than fighting it and then having to deal with the inevitable upset in the middle of the night.

Long term though, it sounds like your sister will just have to make other arrangements. Nothing wrong at all with having their dog in the bedroom if that works for them, but it doesn't work for you and it's clearly way too confusing for the dog.

Yup, I think you're right- it might be best just to settle down for the night on the sofa.

OP posts:
Original poster
Puffalicious · 27/08/2022 22:06

MyGirlDaisy · 27/08/2022 21:53

For the sake of everyone getting sleep I would just let her back upstairs again - does she have her own bed? If so you could put that in your room and put old towels on the floor to protect the carpet- but then I am a softie, my dog sleeps on our bed or in our room most nights. Her routine is disrupted so not really her fault.

Going forward your sister might have to make different arrangements though!

She has her own, beautiful bed, but seems reluctant to be in it!

I think she knows she'll need to have arrangements for longer than a few days after learning from teens they'd slept downstairs (I wouldn't have said- I haven't moaned at all).

OP posts:
Mrsjayy · 27/08/2022 22:08

You are going to have to sleep with her either in the living room or in your bedroom If she sneaks onto pillows certainly move her but she is used to being near her people and I don't think it's fair you disrupting that routine, fwiw I agree with you I didn't my own dogs on beds etc but if I was dog sitting I'd go with what the owners did,

Mrsjayy · 27/08/2022 22:09

You could shoo her off your bed she will eventually go to her own but I think you need to be with her.

Original poster
Puffalicious · 27/08/2022 22:10

mountainsunsets · 27/08/2022 21:56

She needs to either sleep upstairs with you, or one of you needs to sleep downstairs with her.

There really is no other solution here. You knew she slept in the bed and agreed to have her overnight anyway 🤷🏻‍♀️ in the nicest possible way, what did you expect?

Well, when we started looking after her when she was younger she always slept in the kitchen at home and did at ours too. This continued until about 4 months ago when she was then sleeping in the bed at home, which is when the problems started. So we didn't expect her to sleep with us.

OP posts:
Original poster
Puffalicious · 27/08/2022 22:12

Mrsjayy · 27/08/2022 22:09

You could shoo her off your bed she will eventually go to her own but I think you need to be with her.

I'll try this, but it was the horrendous vomiting on the carpets that freaked me out. Obviously not her fault, the little mite, but the carpet will never be the same again (despite cleaning with a carpet machine).

OP posts:
mountainsunsets · 27/08/2022 22:13

Well, when we started looking after her when she was younger she always slept in the kitchen at home and did at ours too. This continued until about 4 months ago when she was then sleeping in the bed at home, which is when the problems started. So we didn't expect her to sleep with us.

So when it happened last time and she vomited on the floor and slept on your pillow, why didn't you tell your sister that it was too disruptive and that you couldn't have her again?

I am sympathetic to being disturbed but you knew it was an issue and still agreed to have her which makes you a bit of a glutton for punishment really 😉

bubblesandwineandallthingsfine · 27/08/2022 22:13

You don’t need to be experienced to understand she’s unsettled by the change or routine.
And you are whinging so either make changes or don’t have her 🙄

Original poster
Puffalicious · 27/08/2022 22:15

MyGirlDaisy · 27/08/2022 21:53

For the sake of everyone getting sleep I would just let her back upstairs again - does she have her own bed? If so you could put that in your room and put old towels on the floor to protect the carpet- but then I am a softie, my dog sleeps on our bed or in our room most nights. Her routine is disrupted so not really her fault.

Going forward your sister might have to make different arrangements though!

Can I ask politely 🤭 what people generally do when having, erm, private time in bed if there's a dog on the bed? DH and I were a bit stumped in June for a whole week!

Sorry, you don't need to answer this!

OP posts:
Original poster
Puffalicious · 27/08/2022 22:18

mountainsunsets · 27/08/2022 22:13

Well, when we started looking after her when she was younger she always slept in the kitchen at home and did at ours too. This continued until about 4 months ago when she was then sleeping in the bed at home, which is when the problems started. So we didn't expect her to sleep with us.

So when it happened last time and she vomited on the floor and slept on your pillow, why didn't you tell your sister that it was too disruptive and that you couldn't have her again?

I am sympathetic to being disturbed but you knew it was an issue and still agreed to have her which makes you a bit of a glutton for punishment really 😉

I know 🙈. I just love my sister and know she'd worry if dog wasn't with family (my other sister and brother both have dogs of their own).

OP posts:
mountainsunsets · 27/08/2022 22:20

Can I ask politely 🤭 what people generally do when having, erm, private time in bed if there's a dog on the bed? DH and I were a bit stumped in June for a whole week!

Just shut the dog out for a bit?

Original poster
Puffalicious · 27/08/2022 22:20

bubblesandwineandallthingsfine · 27/08/2022 22:13

You don’t need to be experienced to understand she’s unsettled by the change or routine.
And you are whinging so either make changes or don’t have her 🙄

You're bloody horrible. I love the dog and am not whinging. I won't have her in my bed, so it'll be turns downstairs or not overnight. So, in essence, you're correct, but you could be more civil about it. No need, man, no need.

Thanks for all the comments. That's the plan going forward. Thank you.

OP posts:
Original poster
Puffalicious · 27/08/2022 22:22

mountainsunsets · 27/08/2022 22:20

Can I ask politely 🤭 what people generally do when having, erm, private time in bed if there's a dog on the bed? DH and I were a bit stumped in June for a whole week!

Just shut the dog out for a bit?

We tried. She whined terribly and woke the teens. So that was plan aborted 🤣

OP posts:
mountainsunsets · 27/08/2022 22:23

@Puffalicious could she sleep in with the teens instead of you maybe? I would have loved that as a teenager 😂

Otherwise do it during the day while she's napping or distract her with a chew or frozen kong etc.

Original poster
Puffalicious · 27/08/2022 22:28

mountainsunsets · 27/08/2022 22:23

@Puffalicious could she sleep in with the teens instead of you maybe? I would have loved that as a teenager 😂

Otherwise do it during the day while she's napping or distract her with a chew or frozen kong etc.

I hadn't thought of that, I suppose. DS1 is in the loft conversion- much harder to access the garden- but she could go in with DS2. I'll need to make sure he doesn't have covert snacks under his bed- as he is wont to do- or dog would be sick again all over his carpet!🙈

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