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How much time to spend with pup?

20 replies

kpopper · 09/06/2022 08:12

Nearly 12 week old pup.

For toilet training purposes I was with her a lot and she was getting very mouthy so I've started putting her in another room when she starts that. But then I can't observe for toilet purposes.

DH also thinks I'm overstimulating her by being there all the time and when he had her yesterday when I was at work he just left her in the garden or in kitchen where she can retreat to her crate and said she was fine (but still weeing everywhere as no one watching).

What is right? Am i giving her too much attention and overtiring her?

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Forestdweller11 · 09/06/2022 08:16

Stay with her. She's a baby. You need to get her reliably toilet trained, by leaving her to her own devices this not going to happen.

Pups are mouthy. You are probably lucky she didn't start being mouthy on soft furnishings or the skirting boards when she wasn't being supervised, nevermind the wee!

HandbagsnGladrags · 09/06/2022 08:19

Agree with @Forestdweller11 - she needs you there all the time at that age.

Our 21 week old is only just getting to the stage where he can be left to his own devices for short periods of time. But we still need to listen out for him ringing the bell to go out for a wee.

DogsandBoysmeanMud · 09/06/2022 08:20

You haven't said what breed / mix / bitza they are. My dogs are always crate trained til neutered. Put pup in crate when mouthing, most breeds don't like 'dirtying' their crate. Def don't overstimulate, it's not a child, and you need to get it used to being left alone even if only for a short time, otherwise separation anxiety will cause you much more stress later on.

Also for mouthing pups, squeel loudly when they nip, and put mayonnaise on your hands / wrists and praise for licking

Forestdweller11 · 09/06/2022 08:26

Pups generally don't get separation anxiety if they are with their owners a lot. They are more likely to get separation anxiety if they are left. And 12 weeks is very young. Any separation needs to be done gradually and at the pups pace.

Check out dog training advice and support on Facebook.

Woolybear · 09/06/2022 08:35

There are lots of puppy training podcasts on Spotify too

BadAtMaths2 · 09/06/2022 08:40

Ignore the mayonnaise and crate advice above. Look at www.facebook.com/groups/dogtrainingadviceandsupport/?ref=share

if you just give free access to garden toilet training is likely to take longer as they don’t get inside outside. Leave the dog by ‘flitting’, show that you moving around the house isn’t always interesting. Leave them for a bit (10 minutes or so) when they are toilettes, fed sleepy and happy,.

the biting, leave the room for a second or two, no more it resets the. Without punishing. Usually very bitey is tired puppy. Have lots of puppy chews, kings, toilet rolls, frozen carrots or broccoli stems.

TranquilBlue · 09/06/2022 08:43

As a pp said, pups will mouth, it’s how they explore their environment, but excessive mouthing, if that what’s she’s doing, is usually the result of being over tired. The mouthing is essentially the ‘tired-but-wired’ thing toddlers do when they are exhausted. At her age she should be sleeping 18-20 hours a day, but like any toddler will need help to actually do it.

It would be better to put her in her safe place, crate or puppy run for a nap, with you close by, than shutting her away where you can’t see her and she will feel isolated. She’s only a baby, she needs to trust that you aren’t going to suddenly disappear (which is how separation anxiety can develop) and she won’t learn to self-settle by just being locked away out of sight, as you have said, it will also be detrimental to toilet training.

If you don’t have a crate or pen, could you invest in a dog/baby gate and just pop her the other side of that with a comfy bed and something to lick or chew? (Both of which are calming behaviours that will encourage her to settle/rest and hopefully fall asleep.) You can sit quietly close to the other side of the gate and read a book or mumsnet or something, so you’re still a close presence, but not engaging with the mouthing, which will result in you becoming boring and she’s more likely to settle.

(Don’t squeal when nipped either, that’s just more stimulation and will most likely make her more excited and nippy.)

kpopper · 09/06/2022 08:56

She does have a crate but I don't close it just give her the run of the closed off kitchen at night. She gets distressed if crate closed. She's happy to be left at bedtime just puts herself in crate:

She's a golden retriever.

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whenwillthemadnessend · 09/06/2022 08:57

She needs you but they also need quiet time too like putting a toddler down for a nap. She wont want it but you have to be strong.

Good for them to learn to be alone for short periods Gradually up the time every few days and you will have a nice chilled dog that can self amuse. And settle

Wolfiefan · 09/06/2022 09:05

Please look up that FB group. It’s amazing. Your pup needs you. Playpen for time out or gate on kitchen so you can still see to toilet train?

coffeecupsandfairylights · 09/06/2022 09:10

Goldies are bred to carry things in their mouths. Have you tried giving her a toy or a kong or a chew to hold and carry?

tabulahrasa · 09/06/2022 09:55

If you’re removing her or you from the room for biting - you only want to do it for about 30 seconds at the most at that age.

long enough for them to go, huh, my fun game got stopped and I can’t get to my human... but not long enough that they forget why they’re in a different room and find something else to do.

They do need a lot of sleep and with some puppies you do have to enforce that because they won’t just go to sleep themselves, but they’re not really built for alone time.

kpopper · 09/06/2022 10:54

How can I enforce sleep?

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HandbagsnGladrags · 09/06/2022 10:55

kpopper · 09/06/2022 10:54

How can I enforce sleep?

Put her in her crate and leave her alone when she's tired - she'll soon fall asleep.

coffeecupsandfairylights · 09/06/2022 11:49

kpopper · 09/06/2022 10:54

How can I enforce sleep?

Pop her in her bed or crate and ignore her, or use a tether so she can't run about and play.

kpopper · 13/06/2022 17:38

Went to dog training yesterday and talked to trainer about toilet training and whatnot and she said I need to use crate more so since yesterday we really encouraged it and she's fine being in there but today she seems really fed up, off her food and not even trying to be bitey (that but I like) -

Am I now overdoing or the crate? It still feels wrong to me for her to be in there.

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coffeecupsandfairylights · 14/06/2022 06:56

A change in behaviour like that warrants a vet visit imo - puppies shouldn't be fed up and off their food. It sounds like she could be unwell.

kpopper · 14/06/2022 07:34

@coffeecupsandfairylights
I did take her to the vet to be safe and I'm glad I did. Enlarged kidney ☹️

She's been in overnight for tests. No sleep for me, sick with worry.

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Strangeways19 · 20/06/2022 23:47

I wouldn't listen to that trainer, overuse of a crate ie using it for your benefit isn't going to work & will create stress for your dog.
Use it but just for short periods or when she's tired. You want to get some toys for her to play with too
I hope she's ok by the way, and is on the road to recovery

Passmethegin67 · 21/06/2022 15:55

How is she @kpopper ? I have a goldie too - he's three. Facebook page Golden Retrievers UK Advice and Discussion Forum is great for breed specific advice. There are also geographical Facebook groups for goldie owners too.

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