Old dog... How do you know when its 'time'?

[lonelylou09]

My Ddog is 13 and always been super active but the last 18 months shes suffered with arthritis in her hind legs. Not too bad.. She just lost her bounce but still enjoying life very much.
The last 6 months she started acting oddly... Pacing around and standing staring at nothing so the vet said it was most likely dementia.
The last 2 weeks shes gone really downhill. Accidents getting more frequent, shes very restless and after over a year of not spending time in the garden shes taken to either laying out there or pacing around and staring at nothing.
Then a week ago she didn't get up and i realised that she couldn't actually get up. I kneeled over her sobbing and once i got her up she was fine. I took her the vets the next day thinking this is it and yet she was having such a good day he said it wasnt time yet and i would just 'know when the time comes' and basically to take each day at a time until the bad days outweigh the good.
Since then she had 2 ok days but the last couple of days have been hard.
I helped her up this morning but her legs where so weak and shes now incontinent.
I feel like obviously I want her to live forever and dont want to lose any time with her but also its really killing me watching her being so restless and so weak.. I dont think I want her to get worse.
Ive known people that just help the dogs up and clean up the mess and keep them going but surely thats not in the dogs best interest?
Everyone tells me ill know when its time but how?

@CatsAreCrackers thank you. That was late last year and we caught the sunset at just the right time. Will most definitely be getting ir blown up and im lucky enough to have some professional photos of her as we did a photo shoot for dogs today magazine a few years ago.
Thank you so much for your kind words xx

I knew it was time when my old Dobie girls back legs went.

I remember her struggling into the garden and falling into her own mess.

She looked at me as if to say "fml" and I said Ok princess I hear you.

She wasn't in pain. The condition she had was painless. But life was getting too much of an effort for her.

She'd always been so athletic and to see her struggling about was heart breaking.

Just read your update. So sorry you've had to make the decision. But it's made with love for her. She's beautiful.

Thinking of you 💞🐾🌈

Thinking of you today @lonelylou09 and sending you strength x

Been thinking about you today @lonelylou09 and hoping you are doing okay. Sending hugs for what must have been a heartbreaking day. xx

Me too 💗

Thank you. Was just the worst day but we spoilt her rotten with salmon and ice-cream and bacon and myself and son stayed with her all day so she had so many cuddles.
The vets where fab and let my son come in too but that part was horrible. She was very stressed and frantic to get out.. Shes always been the same and i would of scooped her up and ran to the car with her except i couldn't face thinking of her pacing around and not being able to get up.
Once the sedation had kicked in she finally relaxed but I so wish we could of just done it at home as it upset us both to see her being so stressed after she had had such a relaxing day.
I feel horrible and guilty and just lost without. Ive had her with me everyday for 12 years and she never used to leave my side when she was younger.
Looking back on photos and videos of her even a year or so ago I can now see how far and fast she had declined.
We brought her home and let our other dog see her and we did paw prints and took some fur.
Im awake now as I can't sleep and miss her so much.
Thanks for all your lovely comments xx

Oh no am so sorry. The pain and loss is terrible ❤️ You did the right thing. I know she was stressed for a short while but she would have been miserable living like that. It's good you have each other for comfort.
We may have to take ours in too but took him yesterday for pain relief and for once he wasn't bothered. I think that's the dementia. We didn't hear back from vet who comes to the home? Which doesn't give me much faith.

How is your other dog doing?

That photo is heart breaking but also beautiful. I am so sorry you had such a stressful end. I do wish vets could be more accommodating.

The love you have shines through. I am so sorry but you did the right thing 🐾

@Juniper68 thank you. And yes id probably say that is the dementia with your boy as mine was fine going last week and yesterday.
It was just timing really as weve always had to wait outside because shes always barked so much. The nurse called us in and left us for a while in the room before the vet came in so by then she was in a frenzy to get away. So it just seemed to take such a long time which made it worse i guess. My oh was outside in the car and he said we were in there for over an hour so it was a long time when i guess i imagined it being quick for her. I suppose its different with every dog but he then decided he should sedate her first so he seemed to be gone for ages to get that. She was still going mad for a while and then slumped down in a second. He left us a good while then came in and couldn't find vein for the sleep injection so that was horrible for us.
I felt so guilty her just being there on the floor somewhere she had always hated and staring at a wall as she went.
So if you can id push for the vet to come out or at least to arrange a quick sedation. Since covid my vets have been either doing the dogs in the car or having to take them in on their own and they dont really have a place to do it so i guess i just have to feel lucky that she had us with her and once she was sedated she was totally unaware i think.

We brought her home and let our other dog see and smell her. He seems fine at the moment. Hes been with her since we brought him home as a pup 10 years ago but i guess hes got used to her sometimes not being here when i would take her the vets.
I hope you get a peaceful ending for your boy either way.
Waking up this morning without her in her usual spot was so hard but i feel better in some way to not be stressed about her decline and if she is ok.
I just feel i hope she understands and forgives me as it really is such a cruel thing to have to do.. This final act of kindness xx

I'm sorry and I think that's bad form of the vets. I'd complain once you feel able but up to you.
She's at rest now though. No more stress and suffering x

@Juniper68 it wasnt the best experience but if they weren't able to do a home visit then its better that than in the car or her going in alone.
So ive comforted myself abit today thinking it was some short time of stress for her waiting compared to us not being with her.

(((HUG)))

You did the kindest thing possible. It feels so horrible and hurts so much xx

she was a beautiful girl indeed!

yake care of yourself 🌷

Yes you definitely did well by her. Too many hold on too long. Not knocking them as it's a traumatic thing to do. I've decided I won't be getting another dog after my boy goes. Too heartbreaking.