Doggy stress

[Blahblahblah40]

Has anyone ever noticed a change in their dog’s behaviour when their children aren’t in the house? My DC has been away at her Dad’s since Saturday for school holidays and I’m finding that my 5 month pup has been a lot less whiney etc the last couple of days. Is it possible that not having a child in the house has lessened his stress or do you think it’s more likely that because I’m less uptight with not having the demands of school and entertaining a child that he is maybe less stressed?

I know of a rescue pup that got returned to rescue over the pandemic as it could not handle the kids being home all the time. Poor thing was so stressed out, never getting that at-school peace and quiet, it was impacting the whole family.

Dogs need time to relax and destress as much as parents!

Many dogs do find young children quite stressful, so it's very possible that he's struggling and enjoying the peace and quiet.

How much space and time does he get away from your DC when she's home? What are her interactions like with the puppy?

@bunnygeek ☹️ thats my worry. DC with Dad all this week then me all next. This is the first set of school holidays we have had since we got him so it will be a bit of trial and error I think. Is an anxious wee pup anyway so I’d be lying if I didn’t say I was a little concerned he will be totally out of routine (what little routine we have anyway). He has his own room to escape to if he wants but also has a bit of separation anxiety so not totally sure how I’m going to juggle everything. He will settle if we do but is just desperate to be a part of everything when we are all in the house.

Should I be ‘scheduling’ quiet time/quiet activities for when he would usually sleep and tell them they can be as loud as they want when we are outside, e.g. on walks etc but ignore him when he should be sleeping so he takes himself to bed?! Gosh it’s bloody hard isn’t it…

Should I be ‘scheduling’ quiet time/quiet activities for when he would usually sleep and tell them they can be as loud as they want when we are outside, e.g. on walks etc but ignore him when he should be sleeping so he takes himself to bed?! Gosh it’s bloody hard isn’t it…

Yes, 100%. It's really important that dogs (especially puppies) have the right amount of sleep and rest. Either pop the puppy in his own room/crate or ensure your DD understands that the dog is sleeping so she needs to be quiet.

I also have upstairs so can maybe send them to play up there to let him settle?

Whyyyyyyy is it all so stressful 😩😂

@Blahblahblah40

I also have upstairs so can maybe send them to play up there to let him settle?

Yep, that would be fine too!

Five month old puppies need about 18-20 hours of sleep a day - way more than you'd think, and way more than they like to think they need too!

Think about how poorly your DC behave when they're tired, excited or frustrated - they might whine, tantrum, shout, get silly or have a hissy fit - puppies are the same! Lots of rest, downtime, the right amount of exercise and mental stimulation and you'll be good to go :)

Sorry, missed your initial message @fairylightsandwaxmelts!

He is at home with me while I am working 5 days out of 7 (while she is at school) and after 8pm in the evenings as she is off to bed. So he gets lots of quiet time. They are around each other in the mornings obviously, for 2-3 hours in the evening and then every 2nd weekend when she isn’t at her Dad’s. But she is only 7 so keeping quiet/calm all the time just isn’t possible. I also feel a bit guilty asking her to change her behaviour for him iykwim? Think I’m just concerned because he has been quite difficult recently with demand barking/excitable behaviour and seems a little better the last 2 days. I’d hate to think living with her is stressing him out because I don’t know what I’d do.

Their interactions are generally very good. I’ve taught her about looking at his behaviour and letting him come to her. Only ever had one issue since the nippy stage stopped and that was rather strangely a reaction to her having her hood up on her jumper. Sorted it quickly though.

I also feel a bit guilty asking her to change her behaviour for him iykwim?

I totally get that, but you'd expect her to change her behaviour around eg. a newborn baby sibling, so a puppy is no different imo :)

I would try and make her feel like she's a really important part of the puppy's life - so for example, she could (under strict supervision) "help" you with things like training basics commands (sit, stay, roll over etc.), help you pick out things like toys for him, fill the dogs' food or water bowls etc.

So instead of expecting her to be quiet all the time, make looking after the puppy (within reason) something she can help with, and she can then learn how important it is that the puppy gets lots of sleep so it can grow big and strong etc.

Think I’m just concerned because he has been quite difficult recently with demand barking/excitable behaviour and seems a little better the last 2 days.

Remember, he's only little and a lot of that will be excitement and also just adolescence kicking it. He won't be a puppy forever!

I’d hate to think living with her is stressing him out because I don’t know what I’d do.

While many dogs do struggle with noisy DC, the reality is the vast majority will be absolutely fine once they're grown up, calmer and able to manage their emotions more, so please don't worry too much. The puppy/adolescent stage is the hardest part - it does get better, I promise!

I have recently found a dog trainer called MK9 training.
He has a subscription service for his website & access to a private Facebook group and absolutely fantastic advice. All about dogs mental health & how we as owners can help them.
Might be worth a look.

Thank you for the tip @MrsStrongman, will go have a G@@gle!