How best to deal with dogs here

[ThatPosterIsSoRight]

I have no experience of dogs, so wise dog owners I’m looking for your expertise.

We live near a quiet beach. Everyone has a dog. (Except us, obviously). I have an older child who is terrified of dogs. I like dogs. But I don’t like dogs jumping up at me (particularly when they are wet and Sandy).

What should we do in the following situations:

1. Dog runs up with its ball in mouth and jumps up at me.

For context on this one, I recognised this dog/owner today as a past offender and ignored the dog. It still jumped up at me. I said “sit” and “drop” which it did for about 2 secs then jumped up again. (It was also ignoring its owner so it’s not just my lack of dog-authority).

Dogs also jump at my DC who is terrified of them.

1. When a dog stands at barks at you.

This happens to my children at least once an outing, but not to me so must be a reason. My children just stand still.
I glare at the owners. The owner says their dog is scared of people. I say these particular people are scared of dogs. Nothing is solved.

Help appreciated.

I would be first telling owners to get dogs on lead if they have no control. The dogs shouldn't be coming anywhere near you. A dog in control will not go up and bother anyone human or dog.

From a dog behaviour pov, in both scenarios, you would break eye contact (i.e. do not stare the dog in the eyes and look purposefully away) and half turn your body away from them to give clear signals that you are disengaged with them and - therefore - wish them to disengage with you. In some cases, dogs who bark at people are barking simply because by looking directly back at the dog, it causes the dog to feel uneasy. (Even though watching a barking dog closely makes a lot of sense if you are not sure what they will do next).

These are not guaranteed to work as it very much depends on how the dog reads the cues and to what extent they know or can respond accordingly.

None of which is meant to suggest this is your fault or any reason why you should have to put up with this - so a loud, clear and sharp "get your dog(s) under control now" to the owner might also be useful in the case of the jumping dogs.

I'd also be tempted to be clear with them - once the dog is under control - that repeat offenses will be reported. Whilst you're likely to get a mouthful back from the owners regardless, I suspect they will try harder to control their dogs around you, specifically, in the future.

@Indoctro

I would be first telling owners to get dogs on lead if they have no control. The dogs shouldn't be coming anywhere near you. A dog in control will not go up and bother anyone human or dog.

In a park I’d agree, on an almost deserted beach I feel as though the dogs should be able to run free, hence focus on our behaviour not the dogs’. But they should also be properly trained of course.

@SirSniffsAlot

From a dog behaviour pov, in both scenarios, you would break eye contact (i.e. do not stare the dog in the eyes and look purposefully away) and half turn your body away from them to give clear signals that you are disengaged with them and - therefore - wish them to disengage with you. In some cases, dogs who bark at people are barking simply because by looking directly back at the dog, it causes the dog to feel uneasy. (Even though watching a barking dog closely makes a lot of sense if you are not sure what they will do next).

These are not guaranteed to work as it very much depends on how the dog reads the cues and to what extent they know or can respond accordingly.

None of which is meant to suggest this is your fault or any reason why you should have to put up with this - so a loud, clear and sharp "get your dog(s) under control now" to the owner might also be useful in the case of the jumping dogs.

I'd also be tempted to be clear with them - once the dog is under control - that repeat offenses will be reported. Whilst you're likely to get a mouthful back from the owners regardless, I suspect they will try harder to control their dogs around you, specifically, in the future.

Thank you that’s very helpful

For the dog that is barking because it is scared, I agree with previous poster break all eye contact. If you are standing face on, turn side on - so your side is to the dog. Easier said than done but try not to have rigid body language - loose relaxed limbs. If the dog can see your eyes, blink very slowly (but again not making direct eye contact).

I have a fearful dog, always on the lead - but she would tend to bark at people who 'behave' like an intimidating or nervous dog - e.g. square on, rigid body language, fixed staring, jerky movements.

Actually interesting that you say the fearful dog barks at your children (who are also fearful) and not you. The dog can sense this fear through body language. It is very difficult if you have fear - but the goal is to loosen the body language. Calm relaxed dogs have loose limbs, relaxed jaws, soft eyes. Rile up or nervous dogs have the opposite body language - rigid, erect, fixed hard stare.

Yes try to relax, turn part away from the dog, look away, walk away calmly.
If the owner does approach within earshot, then a firm 'please keep your dog away from us' should be more than enough if they have a modicum of sense.
Don't worry about being on a beach, it's not a dog park, it does not entitle crap owners to let poorly trained dogs run riot.

I know this is difficult, but try and keep your voice as calm as possible, this is especially important for children as their voices are a lot higher pitched.

BTW I'm not saying you're at fault for this, it is most definitely the owners who are at fault, but until the dog is under control, it is important not to do anything that would cause it to escalate.

We have two large dogs who become excitable very easily. I'm pretty confident they would not bite but they do jump up and their claws scratch. Due to this, they are not allowed off lead.

If you can, it would be a good idea to sort out your DC's fear. If you have any friends with gentle dogs, can you do some sort of introduction - so child and dog in same room but not interacting etc. We used to have a fantastic dog for this, but I wouldn't trust my current two ruffians with anyone under 5ft.

The owners are at fault, but you are engaging with the dog. So as others have said break eye contact and turn away. By attempting to have any ‘authority’ and saying sit you are engaging the dog with you.
Just for reference, when I walk my dogs I train them to ignore people, but I’d guess one in ten (maybe) stick their hands out, make calling noises and try to get their attention “because they love dogs” 🙄. It’s a bloody nuisance and undoes lots of training. You kind of need these dogs to recognise that you aren’t one off these people so refuse to engage. What you are doing at the moment makes you interesting.

I’d also ask around and find if anyone locally had a nice calm dog your DC can meet. A fear of dogs can be pretty debilitating. Yes there are some it’s right to be wary of, but it isn’t right they are terrified whenever there are dogs around regardless of what the dogs are doing.

So got to try I out on the same naughty dog today. He only jumped up once, so I suppose that’s progress.

Also I can report that Naughty Dog is called Merlin.

I spoke to DC1 about the suggestions here, and he was really pleased to have what he saw as a solution. Hopefully he’ll remember it next time a dog approaches him (he’s 12).

In an emergency (and ONLY in an emergency) throw a handful of sand into the dogs face. It has the same effect as when we get sand in our eyes - unpleasant but not harmful.

Otherwise, as per others, turn your back, don't react and walk away.

Really well done in giving your DC some of the advice on here. In addition, many dogs are not pets but used by the police and security in various locations, and there are all types of assistance dogs too.