How soon is too soon to get another?

[KnittedJumper1]

We lost our faithful friend recently and I am unsure if it's too soon to get another.

How soon is too soon?

I don't think there is such a thing as too soon. I would have said as long as you feel ready then that's ok. Grief is a funny thing and everyone reacts differently. There is no right answer, just do what feels right to you

Whenever you feel right - there's no such thing as "too soon" IMO

I'm sorry you lost your friend

I think it’s a case of you will know if you’re ready. My DDog died in June last year and I swore I wouldn’t get another but new pup is coming in 4 weeks and it just feels like the right time for us.

As everyone else says, there is no right or wrong in this. You just have to do what is right for you. I’m sorry for your loss - it’s horrible to go through.

There is no right or wrong. I know people who are looking for a new dog the next day (or even in advance when they know time is very limited) and some who can't face it for years. If you are ready, you're ready - just don't make the mistake of trying to replace your dog who has died. The new one will be their own personality with a new set of delights and flaws of their own

Whenever you feel it's right. I don't think there is a set time, everyone grieves differently

I agree with PP, whenever feels right for you. We lost ours almost 2 years ago and I'm only just ready for another but that is also due to how our family/work commitments have changed too.

Whatever feels right for you is the answer!

No right or wrong here. It’s like asking what is the right age to meet a partner. My DS decided to wait 6-9 months but contacted Battersea Dogs Home after a few weeks just to find out the procedure for adopting a dog. They invited her down and she came home with a new dog. They are both very happy.

I don’t think there is necessarily a right or a wrong but I would say, from bitter experience, rushing into it can lead to attempting to replace the dog lost and honestly that’s a recipe for disaster. I had the perfect little dog, in every way, who was with me every day on the farm and he was stolen, leaving me completely heartbroken. I rushed into getting a new dog and while she looked very like him, she had an entirely different character and I’m sad to say I resented that in her a bit. As it happened, she took to my brother far better than she did me and he had her until she passed away at 17. As long as you don’t have any thought in your head of replacing, you’ll be fine.
I’m sorry for your loss, they leave such a hole.

Aww so sorry you lost your dog is one of the most painful events.

It is different for everyone OP, I was heartbroken when we lost our dog and said to DH, if I ever say let’s get another dog, remind me of today (the day he was PTS). My friend on the other hand got a puppy straight away after losing her, she couldn’t live without a dog.

It’s such a personal decision.

Do what’s right for you. Good luck.

I agree with MrsTimRiggins - as long as you're not 'replacing' your friend and setting a new dog up with too big paws to fill. We lost our adored terrier in Sept last year and while we're now thinking in vague terms about a new small dog, it won't be a Border terrier because it wouldn't be him. But the place in my heart for another pupster is still there, and ime the right dog tends to come along when you're ready.

It's sad isn't it. I lost my beloved English Bull Terrier in October, she was 13. Her final years she had slowed down a lot. She didn't get very far on a walk and slept most of the time or just pottered about the garden and house. We've looked into getting a puppy and I think the difference will be enormous, and I know most of the work will fall to me. Having to entertain and train a little dog and rescue all our belongings from it will be a world apart from the lazy dog I tucked my toes under when she sat with me while I worked.

So are you ready for a puppy? or will you find an older dog? Either way there will be a job to do.

Thank you everyone, I ask because it's only been a month and whilst I do feel a sense of excitement about meeting and getting to know a new little soul, I worry the time frame is too short. Because of course I do still miss my beloved dog.

We rescued last time so I am tempted to do that again. I know a puppy would be completely different but I've never done that stage before and feel a little daunted by it.

It's such a personal decision, isn't it?
My old boy was very old (18) when he died so we knew he was on his way out. I still cried 6 months later when our new girl arrived.
She is a rescue, I'm not sure I could have done a puppy so soon. She needed us and she has helped us heal.

This is so timely. I'm so sorry for your loss, we had our beloved BC put to sleep yesterday and our remaining dog is wandering around looking totally bereft. We are going to look at a rescue BC at the weekend to see if he could be a doggy companion but are not looking for a direct replacement for our old dog. They are all different characters, and we won't get this one if he isn't right

I got what I called my ‘spare’ dog two and a half years before my old terrier passed.
I knew I couldn’t be without a dog and when I saw my terrier start to slow down I got on a waiting list for a completely different breed.
When we lost my original dog last year I was devastated, but it really helped having a dog in the house. I don’t think it’s ever too soon, a house without a dog is terribly sad for me and had I not had my other dog I would have immediately gone out and got another.
I probably would have come back with something wildly inappropriate out of desperation and sadness, so for me making the decision on breed and breeder before I had to lose my terrier worked for me.

Hi, sorry to hear about your loss, it's by far the worst part of having pets. As other people have said, you've got to do what feels right for you. I have fostered dogs for a while now and usually when one goes to their new home I'll get another one pretty quick, although sometimes it's nice to have a breather for a few weeks if they were hard work. But then one of my foster dogs was euthanised and it absolutely broke me, I couldn't even think about having another dog and the possibility of going through that again for a long time. It took me a year before I was ready to think about having another dog again. I'm still not really over it and cry every time I think about him.
I have a friend who is the complete opposite and had quite a few foster dogs that were euthanised, because she had a soft spot for the difficult bully types, and she wasn't able to cope with an empty home so would take home a new dog the same day. So it really depends on you and if you're starting to think about it now I would say that's a good sign you're ready. It doesn't mean you're over the loss or will forget about them, just means you can help another dog.

There’s no right time. My old girl is currently not well at all and I know in the very near future, I’m going to have to make the decision to take her on a last trip to the vets. My heart is absolutely breaking and I could never, ever replace her, but I also know my home will feel too empty without a dog and I’ll probably be looking for a new friend very soon after she’s gone. It’s weird because this is the first time I’ve ever had a single dog so I think the loss will hit me really hard.

We lasted a couple of days wandering about aimlessly after our dog was PTS before we acknowledged we needed and wanted another. However, on reflection I do think it was too soon for me. I was still grieving and an 8 week old puppy asked so much of me. I kept comparing her unfavourably to the dog we lost (and still do to some extent) but we love her dearly and I wouldn’t be without her now. Who knows if it would have been any different if we’d have waited ? I think we will try and have two dogs in the future because the complete absence of a dog was so devastating.

Someone told me it’s a compliment to your dog that’s passed away if you can’t cope without having a dog and you want another one really soon.
Days without seeing their happy faces when you come home and taking them for walks and snuggling on the sofa etc can feel like months .
Do what makes you feel better.

I think the same as everyone has said. The new dog will never replace the lost one. They're just the next soul you have the privilege to nurture.

@KnittedJumper1

We lost our faithful friend recently and I am unsure if it's too soon to get another.

How soon is too soon?

I’ve had six dogs over the last 26 years.

When our 11-month old pup died we actually bought another puppy five days later. It didn’t stop us deeply mourning the one who’d so tragically died (still do, 12 years on) but it meant I could go out for walks and have some companionship. I worked alone from home and knew I’d struggle over the winter.

I know some people judged. I didn’t care. It didn’t mean I’d loved the one I’d lost any less. The new pup was a very different personality and brought us just as much joy.

We lost our boy suddenly before Christmas, he was only 10. We already had our next pup, bought earlier in the year, thinking we would have a few years with two.

New pup (nearly a year old now) has been a god send and has kept us going. We miss our other dog loads, but our young boy needs walks and love and has focused our attention on the living.

I think if we hadn't had a new one when our beloved boy died, I would have gone for it fairly quickly. Never thought I would have said that, but there you go.

If it feels right then do it, OP.

When my first dog died I had a puppy about ten weeks later. When he died I had to wait for a suitable litter and it was nearly eight months. My vet lasted only six days when his dog died. There is no right time, but good luck.

It’s never too soon.

The best tribute to your last dear dog is to miss them so much that you need another. No 2 will ever be the same, but your next will create their own space in your life and heart.