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The doghouse

If you're worried about your pet's health, please speak to a vet or qualified professional.

Original poster

Getting puppy tomorrow...

28 replies

triceratopsatemyhat · 23/12/2021 00:59

Probably outing but hey ho.

Due to leave at 6am to drive 3 hours to potentially collect an 11 week old golden retriever.

DH and I both previous dog owners, know the breed, no worries on that score.

I've suddenly got cold feet.

We have DD who is 2, plus 2 other kids who are 8&10 (who are obviously excited as we've discussed another dog for years).

My mind is racing with scenarios where I can't put my DD first because the puppy will need attention/training.

I am rambling but if anyone is able to give me their words of wisdom either way?

OP posts:
Hairyfriend · 23/12/2021 01:13

We collected a pup 3 weeks ago. Both previous dogs owners, but not as a couple and haven't had a pup in 20+yrs.

Have towels/paper towels/seat belt/harness for the journey home . Ours slept the entire time, but some dogs vomit, urinate etc from the stress or get car sick

Its like having a baby or toddler. Exhausting and unpredictable! Nipping to the shops takes twice as long! Trying to cook takes twice as long. Rewarding, but personally, not something I'd have considered with a 2yr also. Our perfect, happy puppy turns into a land shark with the sharpest teeth at random times. Pulls and chews at hands, socks and anything within reach.

I need to watch her constantly unless I know the room/area is 100% safe and absolutely nothing is left within reach (there is always something left there to chew on!) I'd be worried about leaving the pup with your toddler. I'm sure it will be lovely, but when I read that the puppy stage lasts at least a year, I was rather disheartened! We are going to puppy school , reading all the books and providing routine. It must get better, but at times can be very draining.

Best of luck

Medievalist · 23/12/2021 01:14

2 year old and puppy?
Bringing a puppy into a house with young children 2 days before Xmas?
I'd have cold feet in your shoes too 🤷‍♀️
Could you maybe ask the breeder to hang onto the puppy until after Xmas at least?

SantaHat · 23/12/2021 01:17

Honestly? Any breeder who sells you a puppy the day before Christmas is not a breeder to be recommended.

Original poster
triceratopsatemyhat · 23/12/2021 01:17

The breeder did offer post-Christmas collection but I figure it's much of a muchness as we are at home just the 5 of us anyway.

Realistically I have 2 options. Go ahead and hope for the best, knowing it's going to be stressful. Or. Cancel, feel like a time wasting idiot and wait another 2 years until DD is older?

OP posts:
Floralnomad · 23/12/2021 01:19

Why are you getting the pup at 11 weeks ?

Guttedbuyer · 23/12/2021 01:20

You aren’t sure so I think you should suck it up, be the bad guy and wait. If this is how you feel now how are you actually going to feel when you’re dealing with the stress of a puppy in weeks to come?

Hairyfriend · 23/12/2021 01:22

I also wondered why you waited till 11 weeks to collect?

Original poster
triceratopsatemyhat · 23/12/2021 01:33

I think what you are all saying is sensible. I feel such an idiot because it's something we all want but reality is hitting now.

We have been waiting specifically for a chocolate coloured one (it's technically a Labrador/golden retriever mix) so they aren't common. Happened to check and see that one has become available due to last minute let down, hence being 11 weeks.

I've just been reading on here about puppy farms too which I had already looked into but I'm now even more nervous.

OP posts:
Floralnomad · 23/12/2021 02:02

The last minute let down sounds highly dodgy to me however start with the basics - what are the hip and elbow scores for the parents of these dogs

MrsLargeEmbodied · 23/12/2021 06:45

after christmas would be far better

LondonWolf · 23/12/2021 06:50

Last minute let down? Happy to let puppy go at Christmas? I wouldn’t touch this breeder with a barge pole. Personally I don’t think puppies leaving at 11 weeks is a problem. A few extra weeks with Mum is not a bad thing. However I suspect this puppy hasn’t seen mum for a while…

Original poster
triceratopsatemyhat · 23/12/2021 06:52

I've told the breeder I've had doubts. To be fair she's been lovely and said I'm doing the right thing by being honest and not to feel guilty for cancelling.

Obviously it's upsetting for my whole family as we were geared up but I think having read through this thread has just confirmed I've done the right thing, so thank you so much

OP posts:
Roselilly36 · 23/12/2021 07:00

Aww OP, I feel for you I really do. Unless you are sure don’t do it. Christmas is a hectic time, your children are very young, personally I would wait a few years being adding a pup to your family. Good luck with making the decision.

wetotter · 23/12/2021 07:01

Pack away as much of Christmas as you can now before you set off. All chocolate and anything containing raisins needs to be in a high cupboard, and as DC are small enough to drop crumbs must only be eaten when the dog is safely elsewhere and bits can be swept up before puppy can reach them.

Fence the tree and all presents. You'll probably need to do opening in shifts to avoid an over stimulating atmosphere (as a puppy can't be left that young, and needs training to be left happily).

I see from the time of your post that you will have left by now - so one of you might have to do those things whilst other takes care of the puppy. And do all the normal puppy-proofing

Have you had the chance to go out and buy the things a puppy needs?

Most importantly, and especially at Christmas (when there are so many extra hazards) have you found a vet and arranged insurance (or is he coming with a first month?)

(I have to say I'd have left this until after Christmas, because I think it's a bit unfair on DC to need to remove or block off so many of the accoutrements before the day. But it's done now and you'll have to make the best of it)

Btw: 11 weeks is fine. Puppies really benefit from the extra time with their mothers (and all the tellings off they get!) - some breeders refuse to let litters go before 12 weeks for that reason. It's puppies who leave their mothers too early that are more of a concern

VincentIsLost · 23/12/2021 07:22

I genuinely can't imagine having a two year old and a dog which has to be walked every single day for a decade.

I'd definitely put it off and I'd focus on you and all three dc going for a half hour walk every morning before nine and an hour later in the day. Every day including Christmas Day to see how manageable you find it.

Original poster
triceratopsatemyhat · 23/12/2021 07:39

Thanks all.

We already have one dog but he's very old and doesn't worry about long walks. The toddler is an outdoor baby, genuinely I think she would live in the chicken shed if she could.

Joking aside, we are not niave to the puppy process and I think that's why I had a last minute reality check.

We will wait 6 months and reassess. I would rather wait for the right puppy at the right time.

OP posts:
Indoctro · 23/12/2021 07:55

We got a puppy this year with a 5 and 7 year old and to be honest I'd be very concerned if I was you because of the 2 year old

The puppy biting stage is horrible and your two year old is going to get hurt

I think it's a bad idea personally

My kids struggled with it and ended up with bleeding legs and arms, but at least they understood.

AlternativePerspective · 23/12/2021 08:07

Am glad you’ve changed your mind but tbh this has puppy farm written all over it.

Not necessarily because the dogs aren’t going until eleven weeks, but because there’s this sudden last minute availability. Where did you find the advert for this puppy?

As an aside, a lab retriever cross is likely to be very different to a full retriever personality wise. FWIW I have one of each, a lab, a cross, and my partner has a retriever (they’re all guide dogs,) and personality wise it’s a completely different scenario with each of them. Lab is… well, a lab, with full-on wagging tail, need to play, etc etc, retriever has all the retriever characteristics, including the stubborn (or is that wilful) streak. The thing with the crosses are that they tend to emulate one or the other. My current cross is more retriever than lab personality wise. Whereas my previous cross was more lab, and DP’s previous cross was very much lab. In fact I look at behaviours in my current lab and I can almost see DP’s last dog in him.

If it’s the personality you’re looking for then I would go pure retriever. I would never buy a dog purely for its colour and risk all the potential problems which could come with each breed and which might not have been tested for.

SantaHat · 23/12/2021 09:48

I agree with the others, the more you post, the more it sounds dodgy. Well done on making the right decision.

And when you decide to take the plunge again,
Especially with a mix like that - health testing, testing, testing.

Janeandjohnny · 23/12/2021 10:03

@triceratopsatemyhat

Thanks all.

We already have one dog but he's very old and doesn't worry about long walks. The toddler is an outdoor baby, genuinely I think she would live in the chicken shed if she could.

Joking aside, we are not niave to the puppy process and I think that's why I had a last minute reality check.

We will wait 6 months and reassess. I would rather wait for the right puppy at the right time.

Well done for taking all this on board. I think you are wise. Wait and find another puppy in spring. Get a puppy pen too for inside which will make life much easier!
Original poster
triceratopsatemyhat · 23/12/2021 10:06

Thanks again all.

The kids have been surprisingly mature about it (not the toddler obviously, she has no clue!) They understand it's better to wait until we can all be 100% on board and enjoy the experience, rather than having doubts.

As I say, we have one other elderly dog and they are happy to still have him here for Christmas.

Happy Christmas all and thank you all again for your advice and input.

OP posts:
Hoppinggreen · 23/12/2021 10:10

I have a lovely GR and have had them since I was 8 and I think you are right to be having 2nd thoughts to be honest
You have a 2 year old and it’s Christmas, that alone should give you pause.
I’m sure it was a hard decision but it was the right one

Medievalist · 23/12/2021 10:53

Wait and find another puppy in spring.

I really would wait until your 2 year old is quite a bit older.

pardonmytits · 23/12/2021 12:48

I would second everyone here who has said to wait until your toddler is much older.

Floralnomad · 23/12/2021 12:50

If your dog is very old it may be best to wait until he has died as not all elderly dogs want their last years spoiled by a boisterous puppy trying to play .

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