What to do? - Can't go on like this.

[LadyCleathStuart]

My issue is with my youngest dog who is 17 months. He is a big, strong and energetic lurcher. I have another lurcher who is sadly very old now so I have experience with them but the young one is something else.

The problem isn't with his energy or his greediness or any of the million annoying things he does which are typical of a 17 month old dog, my problem is that the minute DH leaves the house he becomes the biggest pain in the arse and I dread being left with him.

Now I know he is attention seeking, he steals things (can be anything lying around), pulls cushions off the couch, barks non stop, pulls things out the bin, runs in zoomies all over the rooms knocking things over. He wants my attention that is fine but I have two children and a job, I cannot possibly give him 100% attention, life just doesnt work like that.

Take today - DH and I have taken a cheeky day off work, we go out for breakfast (2 hours), dog is fine left with other dog, he doesn't mind being left, no issues, house not destroyed all good. Bought him home a new toy, played with it with him, made him up his puzzle toy, took him for a long walk. Got kids from school they come home he gets lots of cuddles etc. All good. DH takes DD out to a club, I take DS up for a bath and hear all hell breaking loose downstairs. Dog has decided to rip open the xmas tree box which has been sitting in the living room for 2 days and he has shown no interest. He has part of the tree and wants me to chase him. I take it off him, remove the box, fetch him his chew stick to occupy him, go back upstairs. Hear chaos again, he has taken the back cushion off the couch and is dragging it around, again he wants to play. Put him in the kitchen he calms until I come back downstairs (10 mins), I give him some treats for being good at last, DS gets his pencils out to draw, dog steals a pencil, wants me to chase him, dog steals DD's gloves that are lying on the worktop, wants me to chase him. DH was out for an hour so this all took place over that period of time. This happens every.single.time. DH leaves.

I'm on a waiting list for a local behaviourist but any ideas in the meantime would be much appreciated.

This sounds appalling. Have you got space for a well-appointed outside kennel/ run? Or get an electric fence so you can safely leave them outside for a while. I have one barker, the other is pretty much silent. I cosy up to my neighbours and they accept the barky one.

I love my dogs and they are difficult sometimes but I wouldn't tolerate this. I have electric fence round the property so when mine are being too loud or mental I shove them outside for 15 minutes to run zoomies and dig holes and stuff. They get 2 good walks a day and are never left alone so anything extra should be burned off with periods of scrapping, hole digging, bird hunting etc.

Perhaps he does need reassurance, thank you will give those suggestions a try.

I cant put him outside he is a digger lol. Maybe we could get a run built. I worry about dog theives, he might be an arse but I still love him.

Wow! An electric fence

Just to say I’m an owner of a lurcher.

Love him to bits. But he’s a twat at times.

Fucker is constantly pinching food. I know have to hide stuff in random places.

@LadyCleathStuart

Perhaps he does need reassurance, thank you will give those suggestions a try.

You are the top dog. He needs to know this. He will always try to push the boundaries and you have to make sure he knows when he is overstepping the mark. Right now he is trampling all over you. He needs discipline and will be a better pet for having it.

@Anordinarymum. You do realise that the whole ‘top dog’ theory has totally been disproven?

A good behaviourist does not use this approach any longer as a simple Google will prove.

@OhDear2200

Yes. I have a rare breed pointer that thinks she can do what she wants. If she strayed onto the road and got squashed or caused a car crash I'd never really get over it. So we have the fence. Everyone we know with this breed has the fence. They only run into it twice, if its any consolation, then they know its the limit. Safety is so important. You can't just have big dogs running amok.

No I did not know this but it works for me. I have had dogs all my life and you have to show them who is the boss or they will always misbehave. This works for me. I am only saying what I know.

I reckon he will grow out of it however if he were mine I would put him on a house line when your husband is out and keep him attached to you that way he can’t get himself into any trouble . You may find that he prefers laying down with a chew / frozen kong than having to follow you around the house doing chores .

It sounds like a classic case of overstimulation to me.

Dogs need sleep - but many young and adolescent dogs don't know when they're tired and need us to step in and enforce naps.

My dog is almost four now and he still sleeps a good 16 hours a day if not more. We were really strict enforcing this as a puppy and now it's second nature to him to take himself off to sleep if we're busy.

I would be putting him in a safe space behind a baby gate with a tasty chew and letting him calm down on his own. My dog loves a good chew after his walks and it always settles him off to sleep.

I think a secure run might be good for some short periods. Does he actually dig under the fence and escape or just dig annoying holes? I just let mine dig the annoying holes. They seem to love it and it doesn't really change my life. Not being rude because I love a lurcher, but are they really a dog thief's target? I thought the in demand dogs were little things like fluffy-poos or mini-bullies.

I really sympathise OP, I have an 18 month old greyhound/collie lurcher and while I adore him, he can be an absolute dickhead.

Exactly the same behaviour as you’re described - stealing shoes and bringing them to me to show he’s stolen them then running away, tail wagging with glee. He’s far too quick to chase, although he’d love that, so as far as I can, I try to ignore the bad behaviour and praise the good. Can see that’s tricky when destroying your sofa though!

I try giving him 5-10 minutes of my undivided attention when he’s in this mood. So sitting down with him, lots of strokes, talking, cuddles. Sometimes it works. The other thing is to give him something that is destructive but not expensive so a cardboard box to tear up - even better with some treats hidden inside it - or an empty Pringles tube with the lid on and treats inside. This sometimes - sometimes! - stops mine from ripping up the rug which is his favourite attention seeking activity.

You can’t wear them out physically so it’s the mental stimulation that I go for when he’s in full annoying mode. Good luck!

He sounds anxious. Is it because he is used to having you both around all the time and when one goes out it kind of upsets the balance and he knows something is a bit off kilter but he can't work out what? So he doesn't quite know what to do with himself and these are stress induced behaviours? (Whereas if you are both out together there is no imbalance.)

I only ask because I also have a pointy hound and they can be v susceptible to environment, even imperceptible chances. So for e.g. today I had a builder round for a quick chat and my pup acted like an attention seeking toddler, bringing him toys, rolling all over the floor....it was as if the energy in the house had changed and she didn't quite know what to do with all her feelings (she is just a year).

Short term I would use a baby gate to shut him in a room while you get on with stuff. Long term I would make sure you and your DH do things with him equally but separately. So you take him on one walk, DH takes him on another. You feed him sometimes, DH feeds him others. The idea of DH giving him a treat or a chew before he leaves is a good idea - so he associates it with something positive. (Then when he comes back, he doesn't make a fuss of the dog, just treats it as a normal event.)

Do you work in close proximity to each other? Perhaps try working apart so the dog can move between you (in different rooms) and choose whose feet to sit on.

I dunno, you probably do all this anyway. But if you say it only happens when your DH goes out then that relationship when all 3 of you are in the house together seems key.

Does he like chewing? There are these disgusting dried cow wind-pipe things that they can chew on for days. They last way longer than pigs ears. That keeps my naughty pointer going when we are busy. But seriously. What a pp said. When you have time, play, fight, wrestle, everything and then its quiet, sleep time. Get them used to sleeping and chewing to deal with emotions.

Does he spend all his time with your dh when he’s at home? I think there’s a strong possibility his behaviour is anxiety driven. He’s used to you both being there and when your dh is out he doesn’t know how to cope.

While you are waiting for the behaviourist appointment I would join the Dog Training Advice and Support FB group. Read their guides and start teaching him a calm settle and using ‘flitting’ to start desensitising him from your dh being away from him for very short periods, before gradually building up might help. The calm settle will also help you to enforce nap times to reduce over-stimulation.

You could also look into something like a DAP Diffuser and/or Zylkene/Dorwest Valerian or similar to help reduce the anxiety. I have used Zylkene for both a young, highly anxious rescue Lurcher and now for my elderly boy who has some cognitive decline and it’s been really helpful for both situations.

Chewing is a really good stress reliever for dogs, so I’d also agree with others about giving him appropriate chews for times when you want him to be calm and cope on his own for a short period of time.

@RickJames

I think a secure run might be good for some short periods. Does he actually dig under the fence and escape or just dig annoying holes? I just let mine dig the annoying holes. They seem to love it and it doesn't really change my life. Not being rude because I love a lurcher, but are they really a dog thief's target? I thought the in demand dogs were little things like fluffy-poos or mini-bullies.

If the behaviour is anxiety driven, sticking him in a secure run is just going to make it worse.

Lurchers are definitely targets for thieves. They are stolen for lamping/poaching and breeding and often used then dumped in the fields if they are not good workers or get injured or lost while hunting.

Bloody hell. Some of the advice of here is shocking.
Cage him? Lock him outside? Top dog? Jesus.
I would be inclined to train calm. A licki mat or frozen kong when DH is going out when you know the dog will be triggered.
I have an anxious dog who is also a strong chewer (of treats fortunately and not furniture) but a licki mat with a bit of peanut butter and mashed dog food/baby food/fish paste goes a long way. I do a few at the weekend and bosh them in the freezer. A kong with a bit of peanut butter, a few dried sprats and a few bits of kibble too.
I reckon it could give you a good half hour. Licking is a calming behaviour.
The Facebook group that has been recommended above is amazing. Loads of excellent advice.

Thank you all, some good advice and I will join the FB group.

Re the holes he just digs the grass but it makes it unsafe for the DC to run around with random holes about the place.

We live in an area big with lots of woodland and farmland so lurchers are often stolen for coarsing etc, one local owner has had someone try to steal hers off of her when she was out walking him its scary.

The idea about DH and I working in different parts of the house could be a good one, will give it a go next week.

Have you tried buying him a sandpit to dig in? Hide some of his toys or some kibble in there for him to find and it should stop him digging up your lawn.

I might get him a sandpit of his own, when he was smaller he used to jump into the DC's sand table (one of this picnic style ones) and scrape about - he tried it the summer just gone and was so much bigger he fell through the bottom and wrecked the table.

The most annoying this is now its morning and everyone is home, he has had his big morning walk and is sitting happily chewing his toy on the rug like butter wouldn't melt. Bloody dogs!

Can you ignore him when he takes things? You are giving him what he wants.
A dog trainer suggested tobasco sauce to a friend of mine, so a smear of it on the remote control and so on. The dog soon stopped taking things.

Ah, he's happy because everyone is in their rightful place and all's well in his world. Perhaps he is part collie and can only relax when his flock is rounded up!