If he can’t go for walks, some of the weightloss could well be loss of muscle mass, which can make them look bony.
My boy (Lurcher, a little bigger than a Labrador in size) is 16, he has a bit of cognitive decline, but not too bad in that department, partial seizures caused by an unknown structural issue with his brain (we won’t put him through the stress of an MRI for a definitive diagnosis at his age) and a spinal issue that affects co-ordination of his back-legs, but isn’t painful. He sees the vet monthly and is on pain relief for his arthritis, plus a med to help with the spinal and brain/seizure issue and various supplements. His bloods are all good, so at least we feel reassured that there’s nothing going on that we didn’t know about. We work closely with our vet and review his situation regularly.
There is no getting away from the fact that his care is palliative at this stage and we will only carry on as long as he is happy and still getting a decent amount of enjoyment out of life. He sleeps a lot and can’t walk far, but does enjoy a 10 minute potter up to the park for a sniffy walk. He loves standing in the garden sniffing the wind and checking the squirrels haven’t had the audacity to enter his territory, loves his food and his snuffle mat, knows his routine and makes sure we attend to his every whim, including demanding lots of cuddles and fusses. He’s sparky enough to know when dh makes his afternoon snack of apple and peanut butter and tell us off if he doesn’t make it on time! One of us sleeps downstairs with him every night, as he can’t manage stairs and he was getting anxious alone after we lost our other dog last year and he is never left alone in the day either. For now he is still having more good days than bad, but that is starting to shift and we are honest with ourselves that we don’t have much longer with him, so try to make the most of every day. We keep a good day/bad day diary on the fridge, using a magnetic white board weekly planner and amber/green/red whiteboard pens. We note anything unusual or significant on there as well and take a photo of the board at the end of each week. That helps us monitor him better to see if things are stable or getting worse, as it’s too easy to be in denial without something tangible to measure against.
The vet advised us to have a discussion as a family and come up with fixed ‘red-lines’ where that is it and it’s time to let him go. Then stick to them, rather than thinking ‘well let’s see if he’s any better tomorrow’, as in her experience elderly dogs can just go on and on in slow decline if their families keep doing that. For us that would be when he stops wanting to do his daft chase me in and out the back door game after his dinner every night or doesn’t get excited when his lead comes out for his little potter to the park. If he loses his appetite, that would be a definite for us, as he has always lived for food.
To be honest, there is no easy answer. Every dog is different and every family will be different as to where they draw those red lines. For me, fundamentally, the question I ask myself is ‘is he happy’ and at the moment the answer is still yes ‘most of the time’. If the answer starts being no, he’s more often miserable/anxious/in pain/confused than happy or he can’t do any or almost none of the things he loves and make him happy anymore then I would have to let him go, as keeping him going would be for our benefit not his. I know this is extremely hard to do, our connection to our dogs is so emotional, that’s why we use the whiteboard and have regular, honest conversations with our vet. I know I would struggle to be objective without that process.
Honestly, I would book a review with your vet. They aren’t going to make you do anything you don’t want to or doesn’t feel right, but they may well be able to come up with some ideas to improve his quality of life and make him more comfortable, if you feel that is appropriate for him and something you want to try. For a start, if the flat feet are painful, some pain relief for that alone might perk him up a bit and a basic set of bloods would tell them a lot about his overall state of health and if there is anything concerning going on.