We've got a lovely 3 year old, medium sized mixed breed. He's a sweet boy but has always been nervous and after a bad experience when he was younger is particularly nervous of children.
We've worked very hard with him and he's now not reactive at all when we're out although we always have him on lead, don't let children stroke him and tend to stick to quiet walks where he can sniff and explore undisturbed.
He's great at home, very settled but doesn't do well with strangers in the house. Luckily we've got enough room that we can manage this easily and we just shut him away (for brief periods) when needed. He loves my parents and PIL however he is still an anxious dog and his bed is his safe space. I've told my mum time and time again to leave him alone when he's sleeping or in his bed. They've just been for a visit and I had to pop upstairs, I came back down to find my mum practically nose to nose with him, he was lying on his back in his bed (showing his tummy) and my mum was stroking him. He was licking his lips. I told her to leave him alone, she said look-he loves a tummy tickle. I tried to explain his body language and she still wouldn't listen so it turned into a full on argument.
She's also saying how much my niece loves him and wants to see him. Before the bad experience he had which made him anxious of children, he did have a lovely bond with my niece but she's only 5 and I just don't want to put him in a situation that I know he'll find difficult. There's no need for her to see him, she doesn't need a relationship with him, we see plenty of her as she family without the dog.
My mum thinks I'm being dramatic and ridiculous and I should let them meet and see how it goes. This turned into another argument.
Am I doing the right thing? She's left and I'm not questioning myself.