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The doghouse

If you're worried about your pet's health, please speak to a vet or qualified professional.

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Original poster

Im still on the sofa!

45 replies

cheeseisthebest · 25/10/2021 23:10

Pup is 22 weeks old this week. We've had him since 10 weeks. He's a shih tzu and he's not been left alone for more than a few minutes.
He did sleep happily in his crate or out his crate but gradually I seem to be on the sofa with him on the floor by me more and more and I miss my bed!
It's not an option for him to be I'm our bedroom but I am wondering about him going in my sons room? He's 10 but v sensible and reckons he would love it.
Any thoughts?

OP posts:

Ugzbugz · 25/10/2021 23:13

Why can't he sleep with you? On a dog bed, crate in your room or bed?

userxx · 25/10/2021 23:15

Do it.

Original poster

cheeseisthebest · 25/10/2021 23:17

@Ugzbugz

Why can't he sleep with you? On a dog bed, crate in your room or bed?

Not an option for him to be in our room, like I said!

OP posts:

icedcoffees · 26/10/2021 07:24

I wouldn't leave a young puppy unattended in a 10yo's bedroom - too much temptation and things to chew, plus what would your son do if the dog had an accident in the bed or on the floor?

I think if you're not able or willing to have the dog in your room then you need to think of another solution - the crate going in the upstairs hall, for example, or his bed right outside your door with a babygate across the entrance.

Original poster

cheeseisthebest · 26/10/2021 08:04

He's not a chewer, never chews anything and I would be right next door.
Anyone have any other ideas?
I've tried everything to get him to like his crate.

OP posts:

tabulahrasa · 26/10/2021 09:23

Why would your room not be an option, but your DS’s could be?

Sorry, it’s not really relevant to anything I suppose, I’m just confused as to why he’d be allowed in one bedroom and not the other rather than none.

But I’d have suggested putting him in your room and gradually moving the crate...so...some variation of that I suppose?

The main issue with your DS’s room is how would you get the puppy to bed at night without waking your DS up?

Original poster

cheeseisthebest · 26/10/2021 09:35

Puppy just falls asleep. He is no bother if he's with someone. He sleeps all night, hasn't needed the toilet at night for a long time.

OP posts:

tabulahrasa · 26/10/2021 12:24

But he won’t teleport silently into bed at night...

Original poster

cheeseisthebest · 26/10/2021 12:26

No obviously not? I would put him there? I'm not sure what your point is? He will happily fall asleep anywhere as long as he knows there is a person in the same room.

OP posts:

RedCarsGoFaster · 26/10/2021 12:26

He doesn't have to have a crate. If he's not getting in with it, bin it. We've never used a crate, and they've turned out fine when left alone at night etc. No destruction, howling etc. Just peace and quiet for them and us.

Original poster

cheeseisthebest · 26/10/2021 12:26

Doze in lounge then take him to bed when I go.

OP posts:

Original poster

cheeseisthebest · 26/10/2021 12:27

He really is a incredibly chilled puppy, everyone who meets him can't believe he's a puppy because he's so calm.

OP posts:

RedCarsGoFaster · 26/10/2021 12:29

So why can't he sleep alone downstairs at night?

PollyRoullson · 26/10/2021 12:31

People are so narrow minded re dogs in bedrooms!

I agree OP there are many reasons you may not want dogs in your room. One of my clients has dialysis at night and it is not safe for the dog in her room.Another has allergies that can be dealt with during the day but having the dog shut in the room at night makes it hard for her.

So lets deal with the problem the op has rather than tell her she is wrong!

Have your tried putting your clothing near him when he is asleep so he has your smell around him?

Does he happily sleep on his own in the day? If not that is something I would be looking at doing.

Can he sleep outside your room in his bed with a stair gate and then get to move him down stairs gradually?

What have you tried to do already and what has he done in reponse to that?

FallonBeesley · 26/10/2021 12:34

I would just let the dog sleep on DS’s bed tbh. My pup slept on my bed from when I was 8 years old and both dog & I loved it!

Original poster

cheeseisthebest · 26/10/2021 12:37

@RedCarsGoFaster

So why can't he sleep alone downstairs at night?

I don't know, I can't read his mind!! But he clearly doesn't like it!

OP posts:

RedCarsGoFaster · 26/10/2021 12:40

You need to actually describe the issues you're having - you've not said what the problems are 😂

If he's never left alone even in the day, he probably has separation anxiety which you'll want to work on every single day until he's desensitised. Took me months to leave our first girl for 30mins without her howling (although she was fine at night with us upstairs). We got her at 9mths old though.

What have you tried so far?

Mantlemoose · 26/10/2021 12:41

Let pup sleep wherever you want it to sleep. Ours sleep on kitchen because that's where I want them to be.

XelaM · 26/10/2021 12:42

Your pup sounds like ours and my 11-year-old loves sharing the bed with him. He just sleeps at night, never chews anything or has any accidents

Allsorts1 · 26/10/2021 12:44

Have you tried lying beside him in lounge and then sneaking out when he is asleep? Repeat if he wakes up in the night (lie on sofa until he’s asleep then return to your bed). Good to have him used to being alone over night as otherwise you’re just setting him up for more separation anxiety. Our dog sleeping alone is the reason she doesn’t have separation anxiety in my opinion, as she’s used to being alone overnight so it’s not scary for her to be left in the same room if we need to pop out. Just need to work your puppy up gradually to being alone - I think we slept on sofa for two weeks and then spent another 2 weeks settling her in crate with us beside and sneaking out when she was asleep.

PaddingtonStareBare · 26/10/2021 12:56

I have a 10month old and right from day one he was introduced to crates and barriers in the form of baby gates, some dogs don't take crates and that's fine they aren't a necessity.
Before this pup I had a dog wit seperation anxiety and it was a fucking nightmare, even with having another dog he did not give a shiny shit, he wanted ME and it was bloody draining if I went out, he did over £4000 worth of damage in his life time and looking back I can see him having 24/7 access to me was not good, I also never taught him to be comfortable for short peiords alone when he was a pup. He got better as he got older but the early years were HELL.
Sleeping on the sofa each night isn't going to help your back or him long term.
Our pup started off in our room in a 'soft crate' he never once free roamed upstairs, think of it as a moses basket for babies!
I brought it down in the morning and would actively go in there himself during the day and sleep, he too followed me everywhere but I did introduce periods of me nipping out the front door then I would just come back in again. I only did the crate in our bedroom until he reliably slept through the night and during the day he had all his naps in his crate downstairs (which is an adult size crate) or he was popped into the kitchen with a tasty stuffed kong.
Sounds daft but he soon got used to me also doing the vanishing act quite quickly, when I was in the living room or working in my office, I'd just get up and walk up and go out the front door, count to 5 then come back in, he also goes into the kitchen when we have our dinner for his dinner and he will stay in there for a few moments, especially in the early days. He huffed and whinged a bit but was given a 'Right here, you can wait another minute.' and that settled him.

I highly recommend Zak George's YouTube videos and Pandemic Puppy Podcast with Sarah Stremming or Routine making with puppies. There are some excellent straight forward no nonsense but kind resources out there that will help you both. :)

Original poster

cheeseisthebest · 26/10/2021 12:56

Honestly I've tried everything. I've slept next to the crate, I've comforted him through the bars. He's fed in his crate, he's happy to nap alone and be in a room on his own in the day. I've snuck upstairs at night. I've spoken with dog behaviourists, dog trainers. I've tried leaving him alone and building it up. Am still working at that. Anything you can think of I've tried.
Even tried ignoring him but he barked for hours and it felt cruel.

OP posts:

PollyRoullson · 26/10/2021 12:58

Is he ok if you sleep next to the crate?

PaddingtonStareBare · 26/10/2021 12:59

ETA I also have a 12yr old and we don't have dogs in the bedrooms as a hard and fast rule. He is not allowed upstairs. I had a baby gate up for the first 6 months and we then removed it, yes he did come up a few times but all doors were closed and nothing of interest. After a week or two he stopped going up and if he tried to follow one of us, we just stopped and asked him to go back down, which he always did happily.
I don't like dogs in the bedroom and never on a bed. I don't want dog hair in my bed thanks 😁

Original poster

cheeseisthebest · 26/10/2021 13:09

Not worried about dog hair cos he doesn't moult.

OP posts:

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