What is your top bit of advice

[Beautyinreality]

Our beautiful pup is 8 weeks today and coming home to us this weekend. Have read all the books etc but as a first time dog owner I am a little nervous. Please tell me your best advice for life with a puppy.

Put him in the car every day from day one. You don't need to drive anywhere, just get him used to being in it.

It’s a lot like parenting.., there is a best way to do things, but mostly people muddle through and it turns out ok.

As in, there’s nearly always a better way to train things or to socialise... but as long as you’re doing nothing cruel or neglectful you’ll be fine - even if you end up going, hmm this isn’t working and having to redo something, that’s ok.

So if it takes longer to house train because you got something a bit wrong, or you end up with a puppy in your room overnight when it’s not what you want forever... it’s not a big deal, eventually.

And if you get a bit lost with it - then it’s way easier to get professional help than it is to get it for children, lol.

Pick the dog poo up please. Otherwise everyone will hate you and other dog owners will get the blame.

Focus on building a strong bond and confidence before anything else. An important part of this is setting them up for success. Remember they are just babies who first and foremost need to feel safe and secure.

Don’t bombard them with too much too soon. Little and often, with socialisation, distance and security over confrontation and immersion and build things up from there. Once they know they can trust you and you will always have their back everything else will come.

… and enjoy your pup! It’s hard work and exhausting, but should also be fun and rewarding. Don’t put too much pressure on yourself or pup, there’s no such thing as a perfect pup parent, just like there are no perfect parents.

(Have a look at Kikopup’s videos of how she’s raising her new pup on Youtube.)

Consistency, consistency, consistency.

If you don't want the dog on the furniture, they shouldn't ever be allowed up on the furniture, etc, etc. Mixed messages will thwart your training.

@Aquamarine1029

Consistency, consistency, consistency.

If you don't want the dog on the furniture, they shouldn't ever be allowed up on the furniture, etc, etc. Mixed messages will thwart your training.

See, I’m not saying you’re wrong... because you’re not in that it’s way easier and quicker with that sort of stuff if you start as you mean to go on.

But, nothing terrible happens, it just takes a bit longer.

You see people on here all the time panicking because puppies won’t sleep alone or won’t stay off furniture or aren’t housetrained yet - like that’s it, I’ve got 15 years of this now because I mucked it up.

But I’ve had dogs arrive with me having spent 5 years on furniture and sleeping in a bed with their owner and I manage to get them back on dog beds and in different rooms.

That’s what I mean by, as long as you’re not cruel or neglectful, you can work stuff out, even if it takes a bit longer than you wanted.

Make sure you have someone to puppysit when you are going out.

Remember the toddler/puppy stage doesn't last forever

Also, do what makes your life easier. It doesn't have to be the thing everyone else does. Our dog sleeps in our bed and I get lots of lie-ins

You are the top dog. Make sure your pup knows his place in the pecking order.

Anything they do that's positive - name it! They learn to associate the action with the word you use for it.

Also, practice recall before they've even left the house. Get high value treats and station family members at various points around the house and take turns to call the puppy by name. If they go to you they get the treat.

My dog finds it impossible to not respond to her name due to this early training, it paid dividends when we started taking her out and about.

@Anordinarymum

You are the top dog. Make sure your pup knows his place in the pecking order.

Your pup’s place is part of your family.

Pack theory was based on faulty research of captive wolves and was disproven decades ago. Even the guy that did the research has denounced it.

Dogs live in social groups, not hierarchies, they need love, security and consistency, not dominating.

All the conflicting advice can be massively overwhelming. If I was getting a first dog again I’d get a puppy trainer and ignore everyone else who has anything to say - listen to Oli Juste’s podcasts - he talks a lot about being your dog’s safe place (he uses a different phrase).
The other thing I would do is get the dog used to being alone. Just for a minute or two at first and very gradually build it up. I’ve heard that separation anxiety is the main reason young dogs are rehomed. We came v close to having a dog with separation anxiety and I am so grateful to our neighbors for telling us quickly how noisy he was when we were out.

Get in a 121 trainer asap, one with experience and qualifications, listen to them and noone else!

Enjoy it and dont stress over it

Nail recall. Life will be more fun and much safer fir him.
We used a whistle from day one - put his food bowl down and as he moves towards it give the whistle a blow. He'll quickly associate the whistle with good things and moving towards you. Then try in the house with a treat or squeaky toy. Then move outside and keep repeating. Bake in that whistle.

Learn about canine body language.

It's SO much more subtle than I used to think. When I was young, people thought a wagging tail meant the dog was always happy, and growling was always an unhappy dog.

People didn't talk about play bows, whale eye, a lifted paw, head turns, yawns, nose licks, appeasement signals, calming signals etc etc.

Learning to 'speak dog' will allow you to understand what your dog (and others your dog is interacting with) is feeling, which is crucial for keeping interactions positive.

@WoodchipNightmares is there a good book about this? I feel we'd benefit from learning more about doggy language

I don't know if you have children, but if you do and remember all of the advice you would have been bombarded with from everywhere and everyone about everything. It is the same for dogs. I didn't know that and it overwhelmed me.

For whatever you do with your dog, however you play with your dog, whatever you feed your dog, however you train your dog - there will be other opinions and other people who did it differently. Some of them will be extremely vocal about their way.

My advice is to do what works for you. If you are happy your dog is on your bed at night/in a crate at night/allowed on every sofa and chair/has to stay on the floor/eats raw/eats kibble/uses pee pads for a bit/has to get every wee outside then so be it, it's your house and your dog.

As long as dog is cared for and warm, not actually vicious or out of control, and you are happy then it's all good.

I like Kiko Pup and Zac George on YouTube for general dog training advice and chat.

Patience
Consistency
Nail recall I agree with PP about using a whistle, , I don't like everyone in the park knowing my dogs name. ( they could call him over and feed him crap/ steal him etc )
Get pup use to ;
Having ears , paws , eyes , touched / examined so if there is a injury it's not scary / unfamiliar to have them examaned .

Travling in cars on buses and trains.
Been around loud noises
Been around other animals
Been around people

Don't be afraid of asking for help or advice , member the only daft question is the one that's never asked .

[quote shallIswim]@WoodchipNightmares is there a good book about this? I feel we'd benefit from learning more about doggy language[/quote]
To be honest I think videos are more helpful than books on this topic, just so you can see the movement and how quick / subtle it can be. This is a good YouTube video about signs a dog is merely uncomfortable all the way up to actually biting in anger

Calming signals by Turid Rugaas is a decent book

Dogs will set boundaries for each other, and that's absolutely fine. This is quite a nice little example Similarly a young puppy approached my dog (NB they were about the same size!) and bit his tail in a completely inept attempt to initiate play. DDog turned around and gave something between a growl and a snarl. Puppy immediately stopped biting, DDog immediately went back to doing his own thing, and puppy learned that tail biting is inappropriate. Puppy wasn't traumatised - he still wanted contact with mine (we moved on shortly afterwards though). All good.

I'm afraid I don't have a go to all encompassing video or book, but some ferreting on YouTube (while avoiding, like the plague, anyone who talks about pack leaders, alpha dogs and dominance theory) is probably your best bet.

@Anordinarymum

You are the top dog. Make sure your pup knows his place in the pecking order.

Dominance theory is bollocks. Ignore anyone who says things like 'pecking order' and 'top dog'.

A more accurate model would be to behave as though you are his mum, because that is how he will see you. He will look to you for help when he's scared or insecure, and he'll want to please you (until he hits the teen phase ). He's not some tiny furry Machiavelli bent on taking over your family; he just wants you to be his mum.

Don't get to nine/twelve months and think 'Isn't DDog doing well! We can relax the training a bit now.' Actually, this is common. DDog has learnt a lot, but is just leaving puppy stage and entering teenage stage. This means they may suddenly start pushing all the boundaries. A previously solid recall starts to be somewhat shaky. DDog thinks it will try sitting on your bed. It might become difficult with other dogs/the postie where previously it had been fine. Etc etc.

Best thing to do is anticipate this and don't relax the training! Keep reinforcing, all the time.

They need so much more sleep than you would think in the early months - 18-20 hours a day. Without it they are bitey, hyper wee nightmares. An hour awake is enough, and the crate is your friend to help them nap!

Thanks @WoodchipNightmares
Will take a peek. I don't buy dominance/pack theory either. It went against OUR instincts and as a result had/have very affectionate dogs. Which is what I want from a family member

@Anordinarymum

You are the top dog. Make sure your pup knows his place in the pecking order.

No, no, no.

The only dominant behaviour I use with puppies is to make eye contact and hold it until they look away (do it very sparingly).

My top tip is to use simple language and short phrases during training.

"Oh, Timmy, darling please don't jump up at me because I've got my best clothes on and you've got muddy paws"

"Timmy. Down."

He's not some tiny furry Machiavelli bent on taking over your family; he just wants you to be his mum.

Completely agree.