Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

The doghouse

If you're worried about your pet's health, please speak to a vet or qualified professional.

Advice about getting a second dog . Please help

25 replies

Supperspice · 21/09/2021 22:49

Hi we have an old dog aged 14.
She is gentle and v bonded with me. Over the last year she sleeps a lot but is always v happy to see me when i come home and bounces like a pup.
She does not like to go out for walks other than sniff walks round the block and back and she no longer likes to sit near me on the sofa and does not like fuss. She is happy with her bed next to me on the floor.
We have been offered the chance to get another dog of same breed( only dog she seems to like) aged 5. Would not consider a pup as wd be too much for her.
I must admit what motivates me is the fear of my old girl.passing away as I love her so much and I am v attatatched to her.
I acknowledge that i am thinkimg about this as the other dog would be a great comfort to me as i wd have to do walks and would get cuddles.
I feel selfish thinking this as i know that i risk upsetting my old girl to help myself.
We lookwd after a friends dog of the same breed last week and our dog seemed fine and continued to sleep a lot but did follow me more .. was that perhaps as she was jealous?
Anyone got any advice or done this am.feeling really anxious.
The other thing is i really miss walks with a dog. I feel safer with a dog. I got our old girl a pram but living rurally we cant go far using this.
Anyone know more about dogs .. their emotions / jealously ? It may be fine it may upset her ?

OP posts:
JustHowILikeIt · 21/09/2021 22:51

Do you mean she knows and likes the other dog?

Sarahlou63 · 21/09/2021 23:05

I must admit what motivates me is the fear of my old girl.passing away as I love her so much and I am v attached to her.

Your dog will die, it's natural and nothing to be afraid of. Just enjoy the time you have with her and be aware of when the time is right for her (rather than for you).

My first dog was my best friend, my comfort, my constant. When he was 9 years old I got another because I didn't want to be left alone when he died. At first Spliff was very put out but after a couple of weeks they became best mates and Jack was there for me two years later when Spliff passed away.

Last year our now six other dogs eased the pain when Jack left us. So the cycle continues.

No one can tell you what to do, but a new dog can energise an older dog as long as you handle the introductions gently and be sensitive to both dogs needs.

The attached photo is Spliff wholeheartedly ignoring a baby Jack.

Advice about getting a second dog . Please help
Supperspice · 21/09/2021 23:14

Thank you. No she has not met the other dof but it is the breed she likes.
We looked after another dog the same breed as she likes last week amd she seemed fine.she was more watchful of me and spent more time with me which i believe can be a sign of jealously.

My old dog really helped me when my dear df died and also when the kids grew up and I started having adventures away in my van as i felt safe oveenight with a dog.
I am.concerned about walking the other dog and her feeling left out as she prefers to stay in these days exept for short walks.
I feel.so guilty in case i upset her in her final year/s.
I will learn from this and get two dogs like you say in future.
My dogs breed is a toy dog and very human rather rhan dog focussed.

OP posts:
tabulahrasa · 21/09/2021 23:16

What do you mean by offered the chance of a dog?

Also, having more than one doesn’t really help when you lose one tbh.

Supperspice · 21/09/2021 23:18

The way you describe your dog as your constant made me cry . Ao lovley. It is the same with my old girl .. she used to even come to work.with me.
She has withdrawn now. Wont sit on sofa next to me. Wants to be near but not next to.
Would she suffer if i took.anothee dig out.. shw oft refuses walks now you see. Wd she be jealous..
The pic is lovley!

OP posts:
Supperspice · 21/09/2021 23:20

Ive seen a dog for sale that seems the best match . It is the right age. Ive been offered first redusal.

OP posts:
Supperspice · 21/09/2021 23:21

I dont expect not to greive.. i just know that I will be devastates but another dog sitting next to me wd be a comfort in that grief

OP posts:
Supperspice · 21/09/2021 23:26

Sarahlou
When you say handle introductions gently what shd I do ?
My thoughs were meet at neutral place.
When the new dog gets here if we get her,keep beds n food seperate. I cant fuss my old girl as she doea not like it any more but i can speak to her and tell her she is a good girl
Shd i walk my old girl seperately ( tiny walk only)sometimes so.that she gets one to one? Thanks

OP posts:
tabulahrasa · 22/09/2021 02:03

@Supperspice

Ive seen a dog for sale that seems the best match . It is the right age. Ive been offered first redusal.
But why are they selling it?

People who care about their dogs generally don’t sell them, if they have to rehome them they either go back to the breeder or into a rescue, so selling it should throw up some major red flags tbh.

CockSpadget · 22/09/2021 02:50

I got a rescue pup when my old girl was 12, like you my old girl and I were very close, I actually got the pup for her benefit, more than mine. After a couple of weeks of settling in they became best friends, slept together, played together, it gave my old lass a bit of a spring in her step again. She passed at 17, and that "pup" is now 8, and I will be looking to rescue another in the next year. Ultimately dogs are pack animals, and as much as they love their humans, they do also love the companionship of other dogs.

icedcoffees · 22/09/2021 07:12

Why would you risk upsetting your 14 old girl for a 5yo dog that someone is selling?

Why are they selling it?
Will they even get along - what if they fight?
What if the new dog has behavioural issues and pushes your old girl out even more?

In the nicest way, at fourteen she likely doesn't have huge amounts of time left. I would make her last months/years with you the best they can be. You can get a new dog after she's passed.

nyktipolos · 22/09/2021 07:27

Hmm having just adopted our 2nd I have mixed views on this.

My older (only 2) loves other dogs. We have Fostered (not while or 2 year old has been here) in the past so know how to make very slow introductions. She did not take to our recent adoptee for quite a while. Despite loving other dogs she wasn't impressed and did go through periods of stress.

It took 6 weeks and now they get on, but not all the time. The older one needs time away from the puppy, so puppy comes and sleeps in her pen while I work and the older one stays with dp.

We are getting there but it's taking a lot of time. Not sure I would want to go through this with an aging 14 year old. Especially, one that is human focused.

Our oldest is bonded to us and there is jealousy, but she is happy with cuddles off anyone. Not bonded to one person only, which is a breed trait, for the dogs I have. But we have always worked in that. We all feed her, all walk her, all play and spend time cuddling her.

A dog new in the house will need alot of your time and attention and that may be a cause of real issues for your older dog. And your older dog liking other dogs of the same breed doesn't mean they will be happy with another dog permanently there.

My other issue is with people seeling the dog. There's a reason for it. Change of circumstances is often the reason being used. But is often a lie. As are the 'oh he is great with dogs/kids/other animals' or 'absolutely dream dog, such a shame'

Most people, who are good owners, genuinely trying to find the right home for their much loved well behaved pet, would work through a rescue to ensure the dogs new home and family is properly vetted. Not selling it to someone they have met once.

That all said, I love having 2 dogs. Its been worth the effort of getting my 2 together. But as I said, I wouldn't have done it had my older one, been of an age where they were slowing down into old age. I think the stress and upset could be too much for them.

Anotherhill · 22/09/2021 07:35

What icedcoffees said.

Supperspice · 22/09/2021 08:25

Ok thanks all. Like 8 said we did look after another dog last week and she got on fine.
The owner only wants her to go to a good home and the reason she is selling her is because she now has to work in a different job.it looks like the dog has been left or ia used to being left quite a bit. I will peehaps take hee on trail if allowed. Yes i could not re home myself but some people are different.. my mate who loves her dog says its only a dog if she leaves her wereas i dont think that way.
The thing that makes me think it will work is that my dog sleeps a lot and therefore wont.be put out as it were.
Have not slept.much at all.with worry!

OP posts:
Supperspice · 22/09/2021 08:29

I dont think breeder take 5 yo back. Also a quiet toy dog would struggle in a rescue wdnt it?
I think a lot of people dont think of those options

OP posts:
rosesarered321 · 22/09/2021 08:33

I wouldn't to be honest, we have a 13 year old large dog and don't think it will be fair on her. She has been happy as an only dog for her whole life, I don't want to change that now.

Supperspice · 22/09/2021 08:56

The owner seems really nice. I dont think she takes the decision lightly.

OP posts:
userxx · 22/09/2021 09:01

@rosesarered321

I wouldn't to be honest, we have a 13 year old large dog and don't think it will be fair on her. She has been happy as an only dog for her whole life, I don't want to change that now.

I agree. I absolutely wouldn't as I dont think it's fair on your elderly girl, she's in her twilight years and wants peace and quiet.

BiteyShark · 22/09/2021 09:08

As you have said in your OP getting this dog is for you not for your older dog.

I think it is kinder to provide routine and peace and quiet for your current dog rather than having it thrown up in the air by a young dog who will undoubtedly take your attention.

PollyRoullson · 22/09/2021 09:14

I very much doubt you will "upset" your older dog by getting a puppy.

Obvioulsy make sure the existing dog is not pestered by the puppy. Many older dogs love the stimulation of a puppy and it can bring fun into their lives. Make sure the older dogs routine stays the same. It can be hard on you though having to deal with two dogs with two different needs so be prepared for a lot of hard work.

I would not let an older dog stop me from getting another dog. However i would research the second dog in massive detail and have meet and greets to see how it went before I committed.

Supperspice · 22/09/2021 09:35

Hi i wdnt get a puppy . As i feel roo much for older dog.the dog is 5 and i have negotited 2 introductions. Owner has not put me under pressure to take her on first meet.
I have arranged appt for my girl to be checked over to make sure she has no pain etc or underlying issues.
I am.consulting a rescue also today to talk ot thro

OP posts:
Supperspice · 22/09/2021 10:40

Thanks all .

OP posts:
nyktipolos · 22/09/2021 11:13

There lots of rescues that deal with toy dogs or breed specific rescues. The dog wouldn't nessecarily need to go into kennels.

I am happy she seems great. But I don't think many people in her position are going to come across as knobs. They are trying to sell you something.

tabulahrasa · 22/09/2021 14:25

@Supperspice

I dont think breeder take 5 yo back. Also a quiet toy dog would struggle in a rescue wdnt it? I think a lot of people dont think of those options
Even half decent breeders absolutely would take them back and lots of rescues exist that use foster homes... and they should be the first options people think of tbh.

Rescues can vet new owners a hell of a lot better than you can and provide back up for life.

If someone’s first thought is to sell their dog rather than do something more responsible as best it’s someone with an ok dog who just cares more about money than their dog and at worst the dog has some major issue that would mean a rescue would be reluctant to take it.

icedcoffees · 22/09/2021 14:44

@Supperspice

I dont think breeder take 5 yo back. Also a quiet toy dog would struggle in a rescue wdnt it? I think a lot of people dont think of those options
A good breeder offers support for the lifetime of your dog.

And of course she appears nice - she's trying to sell her dog!

New posts on this thread. Refresh page