Interesting one...

[Shamsa03]

I have had dogs since I was young however this one is a challenge he doesn't like strangers. I love this dog more than I've ever loved any previous.
I have never been scared of dogs, I have always loved dogs and thought most were friendly but I have now developed a phobia of them so much so that I don't go anywhere near strange dogs, I actively cross the road to avoid them.
My daughter wants a dog and I get tense when she mentions it and I'm dreading it.

Sorry this is personal but are you also autistic?

@Wonderdog5

Sorry this is personal but are you also autistic?

Are you?

What a baffling thread. OP, the meaning of your post is very unclear.

Most people weren't being awful, OP, just trying to make sense of your post. Now that you've cleared up misconceptions it's understandable.

Do you think you'd still find another dog difficult if your daughter got a puppy? Or are puppies a problem for you too?

The volunteering with dogs is a good idea, but if she's not interested there's no way to make her do it.

Does she get involved with your dog?

But you were aggressive right from the start Peopje we’re trying to understand what you meant so they could advise you and you were rude to them.
I also wondered the same as Wonderdog tbh from the way you communicate. Is English your second language by any chance?

I’ve never met anyone that owns a dog but is terrified of dogs! That’s a new one!

OP you must have had to say no to your daughter about other things. This just has to be a no. Either that or you get therapy for your phobia.

@Shamsa03 No my ds is.

Your post was really unclear. When people didn’t understand you took it personally and your answer were really quite blunt. You clearly don’t recognise that which is why I asked. I don’t think anybody was being rude.

In my op was I really.
No sweetie I'm probably more English than you.
So Ive been asked continually what I mean when it's very clear.
I've been asked if I'm autistic.
I've been asked if I'm English
I've been told it the worst written op
But I'm the bad one.
Interesting.

I’m sorry, but it’s is apparently NOT clear when several people all have to ask you to clarify what you mean. Your original post is very confusing. It may have made sense to you but not to others who don’t know your situation. It’s usual for the OP to then rewrite what they’re trying to communicate in a way that does make sense.
And you are now being rude and aggressive to people who are bothering to try and give you the advice that you have asked for!!
I would think you have 2 options
1- say no. That’s the end of it.
2- get some kind of therapy/help to overcome your phobia.

I read this when you'd just posted it and couldn't work it out either however I would say
1 It's your house, if you don't want another dog you say no.
2 You need some help

sorry - hadn't finished
2 You need some help to look at your attachment to your dog!

The problem is I think @Shamsa03 that you mentioned your dog not liking strangers so people naturally assumed that that information was relevant to the post so misinterpreted it as he didn’t like strange dogs . The fact that your dog doesn’t like strangers is completely irrelevant to your actual post which is that you have a dog phobia and your daughter wants a dog . You are the house owner , your daughter , autistic or not , doesn’t get to choose so she cannot have a dog , unless you are prepared to get some therapy for your phobia .

Asking if you are autistic or if English is your first language is not at all rude. Unless there’s something wrong with either of those??

People were just trying to understand why your post wasn’t clear, but you couldn’t see that.
Surely if everybody has commented to say they wasn’t sure what you meant, it must mean it wasn’t clear. But you are adamant that it was.

Everybody can’t be that bad at comprehension.

Your answers on the other hand, have been very rude. At first they come across as just quite blunt and to the point, which is why I asked about autism. You also don’t seem to be able to understand anybody else’s point of view.

But of course everybody is wrong and you are right. Not sure what you was hoping for really.

My dog doesn't like strangers.
I suspect your own dog’s reactions to strangers (people) has triggered a fear in you that other dogs will react to you in the same way. This is an irrational fear, and you can overcome it if you are motivated to, although it may be difficult.

My dog likes other dogs
This is good news all round.

I don't like dogs. I don't want another dog in the same house as me apart from my dog and I don't want one after he's gone
Is this desire not to have another dog greater than your desire to please your daughter?
You’ve said she’s autistic so it’s hard to say no to her, that she will do all the work and be responsible for the dog - so would it really be so bad to get a dog for her?
I understand what you’re saying about needing to meet other dogs and puppies in order to first get a dog with her - but as I say, your fear could be overcome if you’re willing to do the work for your daughter.

You absolutely do not have to if you don’t want to, but that’s your choice - to try to overcome it or to say a very firm No, despite that being something your autistic DD struggles to understand.

Would your daughter be happy to socialise and walk her dog by herself, i.e. without you and your dog? I ask because your daughter's dog could pick up a fear of strangers from your dog.

funnily enough people were not rude at the beginning until the rest of the sheet came on and were rude.
i hope you can resolve it op

sheep

@MrsLargeEmbodied

funnily enough people were not rude at the beginning until the rest of the sheet came on and were rude. i hope you can resolve it op

It's like domino's in here. Thank you. Luckily the thought of early morning walks and cold dark nightwalks for the next 16 years eventually put her off. The relief I feel is immense. I can bet my life I would've ended up with it.

@Wonderdog5

Sorry this is personal but are you also autistic?

How isn't this rude?! Asking someone if they are autistic.. mind your own dam business just because you post on mumsnet doesn't give people the right to be shitty cause your hiding behind the Internet. Imagine walking up to someone on the street and asking them that....you wouldn't would you? Cause you know it's rude

It’s not rude. Your posted on her about your autistic daughter. It’s not uncommon for autism to run in families and I genuinely wondered based on your responses and understanding of what others were saying. It just might have helped other people understand.

Apparently you’re just extremely rude.