anxious dog

[readinglist]

My one year old dog is so anxious I don't know what to do with her, any interactions result in her lowering herself to the ground practically walking in her tummy and weeing herself as she walks along.

We have tried lots of calm interactions with her endless patience when she wees all over the house just because you have called her to come to you. It can take ages to get her lead on as she will run away weeing as you go to put the clip on her harness.

She will not let you pet her she lowers herself to the ground and whines as if she thinks you are about to beat her. We have never hurt her, we do have two young children though so the house can be noisy and she hates any raised voices.

If we have visitors she wees when she greets them, if anyone says hello to her on a walk she rolls on her back and wees herself. We got her for our kids to have a dog to play with and love but they cant interact with her as soon as they greet her she wees herself.

She spends the evening just lead in her crate in another room unless we let her up on the sofa with us which obviously with the risk of her weeing all over it I am reluctant to do.

People have told me with persistence and remaining calm she will grow out of it but she is just getting worse. I feel I have had endless patience with her but this is running out I feel at the end of my tether having had to just mop the whole of the downstairs as she cowered away from me weeing throughout the house as I tried to encourage her out for her night time toileting with a treat.

My house is starting to smell of urine and I really don't think I can deal with this anymore.

As frustrating as it is, you will need to keep building her confidence very slowly with everything tbat she is fearful of.
Does she need to greet visitors? Is it her choice to go over, or do you try to make her interact?
How is she when you try to leave the house? Is she reluctant? Or is it just the lead she doesn't llike?
Sorry, I realise I have put loads of questions!
With the children, you need to take the pressure off her. It must be hard as they obviously want to give her attention, but she may not ready for that. They need to give her space when she needs and to play around her/ with her appropriately. Create physical barriers so she can have space if they are too young to understand.
Basicially everything she is frightened of you need to change her perception of. If she is scared of other dogs on walks, try to walk her where it's quiet and where you can maintain a distance from other dogs/people that she is comfortable with. Treat her as soon as she spots another dog or get a toy out that she really enjoys. It is best if this is a toy you only use on walks. Buiild up slowly, decreasing distance between you and other dogs as she becomes more comfortable. Obviously, it is not always possible to put distance between you and others, but you need to try.
To make sure there isn't a physical issue with the weeing she should have a vet check.
If you're on FB, I recommend you join the group 'Dog Training Advice and Support' They are experienced trainers that have excellent advice for a multitude of issues. You will really have to dig deep to change things unfortunately, but if you keep at it things will change. Fear is often a trait that is inherited unfortunately, so you may have been at a disadvantage from the outset.

If she's very anxious and you have young children, you may not be the right home for her.

Have you had her since she was a puppy and what kind of socialisation and experiences did she have before 16 weeks?

She doesnt seem scared of other dogs she wants to say hello but she is so submissive with them. Same with visitors she is desperate to say hello but as soon as they greet her she just wees everywhere.

Unfortunately she is not food orientated I have just tried to encourage her out of her crate with a piece if salmon for a morning toilet and she has weed all in her crate!

What breed is she?

Have you seen a behaviourist? I think it sounds like this would be a good idea tbh.

You could also try an Adaptil plug-in in the meantime - they aren’t a magic cure-all but it might help a bit.

We have had her since a puppy prior to us picking her up she was in a family home but with two adult children.

She is a Jack Russel it is a shame as apart from this she is a lovely dog but it is becoming hard to like her.

It does sound very severe. I think a visiit to the vet would definihely be order. They can give medication for severe anxiety.
I would allow her to greet pepple outside first if possible. Also, get them to not engage and try to stroke her, just let her sniff them.
From your posts, I do think maybe you are considering giving her up, which I think is understandable. Nothing will be resolved quickly and someone without young children, who has got time to work on all the problems may be better. It is really sad, but you don't always end up with the dog you think you will unfortunately.

How old are your kids? Have they ever tried to hug the dog? Young kids are prone to do things like hugging and petting a bit too enthusiastically when these are things that really worry and frighten dogs (most dogs can learn to tolerate hugs, but it’s not fun for dogs)

At that level of anxiety I would be talking to a behaviourist and my vet - and having some frank discussions about what is best for her (medication, rehoming, confidence building exercises etc).

Apart from the impact on you, it doesn't sound very nice for her to be like that so often.

What experiences did she have in her early weeks with you? Did anything (unintentionally) scary or unpleasant happen that might have scared or upset her?

Definitely time to talk to your vet and get referred to a registered behaviourist. They can sit with you and watch your interactions with her - they will be able to spot things that you may simply subconsciously be doing that are worsening the situation.

I've got a really nervy sprocker. She has Yu-Calm tablets daily (they did take about 3 months of use to really notice the effect of), and we don't walk where we see lots of other dogs as that completely stresses her out. We tend to walk early mornings and almost at bedtime.

Yours is still very much a baby, and learning. You need a behaviourist (possibly through your dog insurance?) and lots of positive re-inforcement. You understandably sound exasperated, but she'll be picking up on this and it really won't be helping her.

I've been using Dorwest scullcap and valerian on my nervy greyhound - they have made a huge difference in her daily walks, and although she's suspicious of many things she is definately calmer. I've not given her the full amount recommended, but did up the dose when we had thunderstorms, but I think it was too late to work well.

You really need to see a behaviourist with this level of anxiety. Speak to your vet to get a vet recommended one, check qualifications etc as anyone can call themselves one these days. It’s no life for the poor thing.

Also ask about anxiety meds at the vet.

We have a vet appointment booked for tomorrow. And they can do a referral to a behaviourist. I cant think of anything that happened when she was a puppy. The thing is we work really hard and she improves but then one little thing sets up right back. We have to collect a wee sample which I think is going to be impossible there is no way she is going to be happy for us to put something behind her, and if it is stressful for her it really wouldn't help the situation. Any ideas how we can get this sample?

What you describe is beyond something happening as a puppy so don't beat yourself up trying to think of an event.

Wee sample: depending on what you have to hand, the easiest way is simply to slip something very shallow under her after she has just started. She may not like it but hopefully the combo of her reaction time plus the fact that she's already started to wee means you'll get enough of it in the container. Shallow baking tray, pie dish, shallow tupperware for example. Alternatively, something like a soup ladle you can just slip under her without bending down too low which may startle her.

Our dog (also a Jack Russell, but a mix) was the same. We ended up medicating her and she is a different, happy dog. I was a bit at the idea of drugging a dog three times a day, but we’ve gone from pee six times a day to once a month.

@sergeilavrov that sounds amazing!! Was it your vet that suggested medicating?

I was going to suggest the vet to rule out any physical problems or pain and a behaviourist if nothing physical, but see you have booked in with your vet already.

With regard to the wee sample, if it's very difficult for you to get one, and I'm not sure how you'd go about it tbh, I think I'd be asking the vets to get one.

This must be very hard for everyone, you and her, as that level of fear must be very hard for you to see and her to live with.

As pp said it might be better for her if she was in a home without children, it sounds like she finds pretty much everything just completely overwhelming and a home with just adults might be better for her.

I hope you can find a solution, although it's clearly not going to be a quick fix, and hopefully medication might offer some help.

@readinglist It was a behaviourist, he said that there was no way to train her to separate from us until she could relax, and sent us off to the vet with a list of medicines he wanted to put her on. The idea initially was she’d be weaned off, but that hasn’t happened as it immediately gets worse if she misses a dose. Vet called it the worst anxiety he’s seen, and said she will be on them for life.

She sleeps for about 18 hours a day, and loves to cuddle, but otherwise she wags her tail constantly and loves playing with our children. We also put clothes we wore into her crate for her to cuddle into as she sleeps, she still gets sad at bedtime, but will now sleep and not cry all night.

@sergeilavrov that gives me some hope. Her crate and bedtime are one thing she doesnt mind. I think she feels safe in there.

did you get to see the vet yet op?@readinglist

@absolutelypatsy yes seen by a the vet but given a clean bill of health, we have an appointment booked with their recommended behaviourist for a weeks time. Fingers crossed she can help.