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The doghouse

If you're worried about your pet's health, please speak to a vet or qualified professional.

Original poster

Dog aggressive behaviour

55 replies

babyboy20 · 06/07/2021 16:36

Hi,

Just looking for some advice really as I feel racked with guilt even thinking about options.

We have a 10 year old dog. He has always had a slightly unpredictable temperament especially with me. However with training and following behaviourist advice he's been manageable. He and my do adore each other but he even has had moments of aggression towards do.

We had a baby a year ago and I'm a stay at home mom now. I keep him away from baby at all times as he is not fond at all.

But his behaviour towards me is frightening me. Multiple times a day he will bark in my face so loud and start lunging at me. I then move and he is lunging at my legs and arms as I walk. This results in him having to spend a lot of time separated in the kitchen or garden.

I think I know what the answer is but my dp just doesn't understand the gravity of his unpredictable behaviour as he hasn't actually bitten me.

He's a staff mix.

I feel so bad for him as he's obviously unhappy but I'm also becoming frightened of him and just don't know how to do the right thing without my dp resenting me.

Tia for any advice xx

OP posts:
Original poster
babyboy20 · 06/07/2021 16:37

Whoops auto correct do is dp xx

OP posts:
Hoppinggreen · 06/07/2021 16:40

Looks like the choice is you and/or your baby getting hurt vs your idiot partner resenting you
Do the right thing and get rid of the dog,unfortunately due to it’s age and temperament that will most likely mean pts but that’s not the worst thing to happen to a dog.
I am a dog lover, have 1 now, look after them for family and friends and volunteer for a couple of dog charities but you have got a dangerous animal in your house and it can’t continue
If your partner won’t agree then you have to leave to protect your son, he could be killed

XelaM · 06/07/2021 16:41

Very dangerous and I would get rid of the dog.

It's a dog that is capable of doing serious harm to you and the baby. Your DP is being totally unreasonable.

XelaM · 06/07/2021 16:43

My SIL and BIL had a Staffy and she LOVED their (baby and toddler) kids and really looked after them. The fact that your dog doesn't like the baby is quite scary

Original poster
babyboy20 · 06/07/2021 16:47

Thanks all I know he needs to go, I don't think rehoming him would be possible due to his temperament.

I feel so sad it has come to this but of course my baby comes first as well as myself so there no question that I will be contacting the vet for options first thing tomorrow.

We've had him since he was 8 weeks old, I love him but he is scary

OP posts:
Wolfiefan · 06/07/2021 16:54

What advice have you had from behaviourists?

Honeybeebloom · 06/07/2021 16:56

You know what the right thing to do for your baby is. I have a dog that I absolutely adore. She was a rescue and came with a lot of issues and could be really unpredictable. She has bitten in the past for food and when she has felt threatened. I'd done loads of work with her and she made loads of improvements but will never be a stable steady dog. I'm 7 months pregnant and when I found out I was pregnant DP said that we'd need to sort something out with her as we couldn't risk having her around our baby. Thankfully my parents have taken her (and she lived at theirs with me in between homes and divorcing my EXH). My mum actually told me that she and my dad never got their own dog because they knew that if I ever had children they would need to take her. I was devastated but I know it's for the best and I'd rather have her in a happy home than risk the consequences of her biting my child, for both her and baby.

Original poster
babyboy20 · 06/07/2021 17:59

Previous advise from behaviourist was going back to basic techniques which did help but the unpredictability still remained. He was also neutered at age 1 and has also recently started humping me too not that I'm bothered by that behaviour though.

I know I will do what's right but it doesn't stop the guilt still love him to bits despite his faults.

we have worked so hard with him over the years but the aggressive side to him has always just been under the surface now to return full force.

OP posts:
Happenchance · 06/07/2021 18:07

Multiple times a day he will bark in my face so loud and start lunging at me. I then move and he is lunging at my legs and arms as I walk. Have you discussed this behaviour with the behaviourist? They are in the best place to advise if PTS is the correct option.

WendelFong · 06/07/2021 18:15

The humping behaviour is about dominance - he's having some trouble adjusting to the new dynamic. He needs to be rehomed, sadly, and soon.

warmfluffytowels · 06/07/2021 19:27

What do you mean when you say his behaviour is unpredictable?

A lot of the behaviour you describe (barking, lunging and humping) implies boredom and under-stimulation to me, which would match with what you say about you shutting him away in the kitchen or garden for most of the day.

How much exercise does he get and how much time do you/DP spend giving him individual attention? When he's shut in the garden or kitchen, is he given anything to occupy his time?

Many dogs bark for attention and most people respond to barking, even if that's to tell them to shut up or go away. If the dog is shut away most of the day, he will behave in a way he knows will get him attention (barking, lunging, humping) - at that point he doesn't care that the attention is negative, iyswim, it still means he's getting your time.

Of course, if you feel he poses a danger to your child then that's different, but nothing you've described signifies (to me anyway) that the dog needs to be re-homed or PTS. In fact, it sounds like he needs more attention and more time spent on him. If you can't do it yourself, could you afford to send him out with a dog walker or something to get him out of the house and tire him out?

Claudia84 · 06/07/2021 21:07

Humping isn’t dominance - it’s stress or over excitement. Find a behaviourist that’s registered with IMDT or there’s a great Facebook group - dog training advice and support group it’s called - it’s run by behaviourists and they can help for free but you do need to read the guides on the page first .
Sounds super stressful and am sorry you’re having to deals with this x

Wolfiefan · 06/07/2021 23:11

@babyboy20 no decent behaviourist would say just go back to basics with an aggressive dog.
Either the dog is bored and you’re misreading the signs as aggression.
Or you haven’t seen a proper behaviourist.
I’m failing to see what’s aggressive behaviour.

Original poster
babyboy20 · 06/07/2021 23:16

We seen a behaviourist a few years ago and his behaviour was more mild.

His aggressive behaviour is lunging at me and nipping at my legs and trying to jump up to my face when I am walking away from him whilst he is in this state.

I have had my dog for 10 years, I know him inside out and his behaviour has definitely became aggressive.

As for what I mean about unpredictability, I mean that he can be fast asleep next to me and then all of a sudden barking lunging and nipping at me. There is no warning.

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Saidtoomuch · 06/07/2021 23:17

Get him to a vet ASAP and explain what is going on. Sorry to sound dramatic, but I've known Staffies to deveop brain tumours which can alter personality. Its sensible to also rule out anything that can be causing pain.
Health issues or not, you need to seriously consider the future of this dog around you and your baby, and I say that as someone whose life revolves around my beloved dogs.

Original poster
babyboy20 · 06/07/2021 23:20

@Saidtoomuch I am going to call the vet first thing. I know I have to go with safest option even if it's heartbreaking. I just never want to cause my dog anymore pain so sad about it all x

OP posts:
Original poster
babyboy20 · 06/07/2021 23:21

@Claudia84 thank you I will look at the page now x

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Saidtoomuch · 06/07/2021 23:24

@babyboy20 Flowers

Original poster
babyboy20 · 06/07/2021 23:25

@warmfluffytowels he is walked twice a day.

He is spending so much time separated because he is trying to nip at me barking at me multiple times a day. I have a baby to look after so the safest thing to do is remove him from the space.

I give him as much attention as I can and he has plenty of toys etc but shows no interest in them

With all of his challenging behaviour he has never frightened me until recently

OP posts:
Wolfiefan · 06/07/2021 23:36

But you’ve never actually been bitten? You’ve never needed hospital treatment?
Sounds like you’ve not seen a decent behaviourist and are misunderstanding the behaviour.
Plus seems like you’ve already made your decision.

Original poster
babyboy20 · 06/07/2021 23:46

@Wolfiefan I have not at all made any decision. As I've said I'm going to speak to my vet about my options.

I don't agree with the fact that I haven't been bitten or needed hospital treatment meaning that I am not right to be concerned about aggressive behaviour towards me when I have a baby in the house. My dog is 35lbs and could do some serious damage so I would never want to get to that point.

Unless you have any useful advice like other posters, please take your judgement elsewhere

OP posts:
Original poster
babyboy20 · 06/07/2021 23:48

@Wolfiefan and yes I do know that the safest options will probably be to rehome or pts. That doesn't make me a bad person. The safety of my child is number one regardless of how much I love my dog.

OP posts:
Happenchance · 07/07/2021 00:40

I would get the dog vet checked, to rule out a medical cause, then consult a behaviourist. Dogs get mouthy for a variety of reasons, including frustration, stress and excitement.

In the meantime, have you tried giving him a food toy, such as a Kong or a snuffle mat? Have you tried scatter feeding his food? That often has a calming effect on dogs.

heartbroken2021 · 07/07/2021 01:22

I understand your position OP, my ddog is even younger than yours and we are discussing PTS with our vet and our behaviourist. Feel free to read my thread it's on here called "PTS - when is the time right".

There's lots of good advice there.

Wolfiefan · 07/07/2021 05:25

If you describe your dog as aggressive then no one will want to take it on.
You say walked twice a day. How long? Off lead?
Honestly everything you’re describing sounds like a bored and frustrated dog trying to get your attention. Not a reason to pts.