How will I know its time (elderly dog)

[RedFrogsRule]

A year ago a vet suggested euthanasia based on the unpredictable but regular aggression linked to his pain from arthritis and a bit of dementia. Since then we've found a good result from gabapentin, paracetamol and yumove. Now max dose.

Occasional aggression still but we feel it's manageable and strangers not involved so only risk is to family (all adults). Dementia seems much better, bit deaf but only mildly confused at times.

Pain....this is the issue. He won't weight bear on worst leg now. Limps and life looks a bit like hard work for him at times. Other times he looks happier and wags tail. He enjoys cuddling up.

16 which I think is young for JRT.

Seeing vet this week to discuss but last visit I was told there is no option for increasing the dose of meds. Hoping maybe injections could be a consideration. Only just aware of these. Not sure why vet hasn't suggested previously.

If I go and there are no more options what then... I can't imagine making the decision for euthanasia but am also finding seeing his pain very difficult. At some point I think this needs a decision but when?
I find myself hoping he's passed away in his sleep. I am glad we ignored the suggestion last year but...

Better a day too soon than a week too late.

A vet doesn’t recommend euthanasia lightly and you need to prepare yourself that they may suggest this if injections or further treatments aren’t an option. If your poor boy is suffering on maximum medication then it may be kinder to let him be helped to sleep to end his pain, it’s not easy, we love our pets so much, but it is the most loving thing we can do for them when they are in such pain.

16 is not young for a JR. Its a good age.
I think your vet advised you its a time a year ago. Your dog is in pain. He doesnt have quality of life.
You need to let him go x

16 is a great age for any dog.

It sounds cliche but honestly, you'll know when it's time. I would be extremely nervous with covid etc that once you know it's time, you may not be able to get an appointment and will cause unnecessary suffering. Possibly something to discuss with your vet.

As above, better too soon than a moment too late.

I put the euthanasia suggestion down to covid. She didn't see him but reacted to the request for help with aggression. Since then I really have felt we've worked to give him a good quality of life. Now I'm dithering.

I was expected euthanasia posts telling me I was a dreadful person (split between for considering and not acting!) so thank you for kindness. Will discuss with vet.

“He won't weight bear on worst leg now. Limps and life looks a bit like hard work for him at times. Other times he looks happier and wags tail. He enjoys cuddling up.”

Roughly what sort of percentage of the day or week is that leg that sore? That’d influence me if it’s sore like that more than it’s not I’d call time.

If he's moving or standing, it's sore
This has progressed steadily and each time we've reacted with meds so it's been resolved and happy dog again. For a week now I've felt its not controlled pain. I've just been hoping it would be temporary and return to controlled pain. I think I do know

Sorry to hear that Op, my dog also had dementia but was not in pain. He slowly started loosing hair and I took him to the vet as soon as I noticed he sometimes couldn’t sit no matter how tired he was.

The vet said the nerve control was going, part of the dementia, and suggested putting him to sleep there and then. I asked to take him back home for DS to have time to say good bye, my partner was away so he asked me to wait another 2 days so he could be with me when he was out to sleep as he knew how much I cared for that dog.

In a nutshell, those extra three days were terrible, he started looking wobbly on his back legs, then started falling sideways, fell down the stairs and finallyI had to sustain him to go for a poo as he started falling on it.

And all that time he was drinking water excessively, and needing the toilet all the time. The poor thing got very very confused. We could avoided all this if we had only let him go with more dignity three days before, it was painful to watch and very uncomfortable for the dig, and at the end of the day, what difference did it really make for a 17 year old dog? He was not meant to live that long to start with.

A vet won’t suggest putting an animal to sleep lightly, if they do, it is because it is time. 💐

“If he's moving or standing, it's sore“

Ah yeah, that was when I had my last boy PTS, there were no more drugs to try and he went downhill fast till one day he was just hobbling.

When I was looking for advice on when to have my dog put to sleep I was told I may regret leaving it too late so I would echo what Herecomesanothernamechange says.

It honestly sounds like he is in pain and the meds he is on don’t take the pain away all the time or manage it effectively. Along with the dementia and confusion it doesn’t sound like the peaceful old age he deserves. It doesn’t sound like it would be too early to make the decision.

Looking back at making the decision for my dog I think we could have gone a little bit earlier (certain family members were dead set against it) but I’m so glad he went when he did before the decision was taken out of our hands.

Our full of life 10 yo rottweiler recovered from cancer in 2019. In 2020 she had a few aggressive episodes.. Vet suspected a brain tumour..
3 strikes of aggression and sadly we made the decision to pts before someone or another ddog got hurt.
Felt the responsible thing to do.

Thank you and for those sad accounts
@GrandmasCat I think you've summed up what I fear. I don't want to act but am terrified of leaving it another day and causing suffering

He limps and can't put weight on bad leg and is in pain. If you love him let him go, don't make him suffer any more. Give him back his dignity and have him put to sleep so he won't be in any more pain. To keep him in pain every day limping along when you could release him from his pain frankly is cruel. You love him and sound like you are putting your need of having him above his need for no pain. Please let him go.

Hello Red, if you use FB then have a look at a group called Holly’s Army, it is allied to the Canine Arthritis Management Group and has some very knowledgeable posters.

I’m in the same boat as you, my boy has good days and sore days.

Have you tried getting advice from a specialist pain clinic? there are other drugs that might help if you want to feel that you have done all you can.

Thanks @NoIdontwanttoseeyourknob. I've joined.

Saw vet. Agreed end stage arthritis. I'd been told he was on max dose but she thinks we can half a capsule and add in but he may be wobbly and sleepy. So an option.

I left totally confused. Was expecting euthanasia but with an option I felt bound to try it. Daughter really upset by this decision. So I later spoke to my dad who also fence sat. No one thinks it's a bad decision but nor is there unqualified support for it other than daughter.

He looked quite bright in the vets. Came home and vomited in the garden and back to limping.

I rang back and I have booked it for tomorrow. Nurse suggested we give it a week...I can't bear that. So now feel like some think I'm doing it too soon and others too late (@caringcarer 's comment of me keeping him is "frankly cruel" is nastily running around my brain ) It still does not feel like the right thing to do. I'm feeling utterly shit

Op you’ve done your best darling.

Im a veterinary nurse and i can tell you that you are making the right decision to let him go. Its so difficult and ive faced this decision myself more than once and it is heart breaking.

Spoil him tonight, lots of treats and cuddles , knowing that his last memories before he crosses the rainbow bridge is being loved.

Thank you. Both posts made me cry. This is so hard

That was genuine thank you. [Flowers]

Or even

We made the decision for our beloved ddog at 13 a few years ago. Not arthritis but a condition that was becoming harder and harder to manage. At the time I wondered if we could have kept her going, juggling her treatment, for a bit longer. With the benefit of some time I'm so glad we didn't. Definitely better a bit too early than too late. it's heartbreaking

OP I really feel for you, this is such a hard decision to make and you really have done your best and have given him an extra year. But if he’s in pain every time he stands I think you know it’s time. It’s heartbreaking, but if his pain can’t be controlled it’s the kindest thing to do.

Wishing you strength and love. You are so brave to put his needs first.

This is what he would say to you.

Hey.
My beautiful dog has been diagnosed with a brain tumour. She first showed signs of a stroke 3 weeks ago. Lost her sight and hearing on her left side. Front leg is a bit wonky but she can still walk. About 10 days later she had a seizure that lasted about 90 secs. She’s on two different meds now and seemed to bounce back, but 5 days after the seizure she had a pallative seizure and paced the garden for an hour digging like crazy which is totally out of character. She was unable to hear me and looked like she did t recognise me, or possibly could t see me. After that hour she came in and went for a wee sleep then again seems to have bounced back. The vet has prepared me that I likely will be making the decision to put her to sleep quite soon. She’s 14 and unlikely to survive anaesthesia so our options are only to care for her with meds and love till they end. My problem is when! Out with these episodes she’s so happy to cuddle up with me and enjoy snuggles. The meds she’s on make her appetite huge so I’ve never seen eat so much. When she’s like this I just can’t see myself doing this. I know she will have another seizure but should I do it now, or wait a bit longer? I just don’t know what to do that’s for the best for her 😔