Rehoming my dog

[raspberryripple86]

I just wrote a very long post and it frustratingly got deleted. In a nutshell, I absolutely adore my dog but he she has issues with her bladder, further testing and surgery massively exceeds what I can afford to pay on top of insurance plus only has about a 60% success rate. The initial testing was done several months ago and I just accepted the fact that for the next 15 or so years I'll have a rubbish sleeping pattern (she's not in pain or discomfort I should add) but a year down, as selfish as it might sound, I'm really bloody tired. Tried if been woken up multiple times a night, tired of washing and cleaning urine every day. I've decided I need to give her up to dog trust or somewhere similar, hopefully they can rehome her to someone who can afford the surgery or has more than one adult to help with night shifts or is able to put a large dog flap in their door or something. I'm not sure why I'm posting. I've spoken to different vets trying to find a different solution, tried nappies and puppy pads, water schedules, prescribed medication etc etc contacted charities to see if they can advise or point me int he direction of somewhere that will do it for the insurance limit plus what I can afford on top etc.

I guess I'm just wondering if anyone has rehomed their dog and how did you cope? Everytime I think about it I feel so heartbroken, hence putting it off for so long, I can't picture myself actually doing it but this is not something I can do long term as I'm exhausted all the time and it's starting to affect everything.

@HerMammy Firstly (and I'm not sure why I'm even responding to this) I am not "callous" thank you .
I couldn't love this dog any more, I give her the best life I possibly can. Maybe you have a husband and children and family, I don't, I have my dog. I am exhausted, there's a difference. I have had barely any sleep despite trying various different things, I feel like I've looked into everything, and tried everything short of moving which is something I literally can't do. This dog is my world, she is like my child, hence not even considering rehoming her and accepting this is how it's going to be. If I was callous I would've rehomed her ages ago, given her to someone who will tie her up outside or something, this is a last resort from someone who is so exhausted it's affecting their work and mood.

I will reply properly later but I have contacted charities for advice, a friend of mine who works doing animal rights/keeping owners and pets together etc has also been helping me (she's who has gotten advice from retired vets to see if there are any other options), i have seen two vets and a specialist vet, I have tried retraining her toilet on a puppy pad for several months (have contacted a well very dog trainer about this) continuing to try, I am unable to leave door open as it's not safe where I live, I (and my friend who works with animals) have contacted (I can't remember the names) but some trainee vets and also an apparently famous(?) vet because her condition is rare In the hope they can do reduced rate because they can learn from the condition/treatment.

Like I say I'm not trying to give someone else a problem, there are people out there who can either a) afford to pay the extra on top of insurance OR b) more likely, live somewhere safe and secure enough to leave a back door open or have space and afford to have some type or dog door and dog run type thing.

@pilates

I think your dog would be a struggle to rehome and would be put down.

This was also my first thought.

Where does the dog sleep overnight ? Would it be possible to put her in a large pen overnight with room for her bed and a pad so she will have to go on the pad or at least be contained . The same could be used when you are out or not supervising or able to leave the door open . I assume if the dog has access to outside she manages to get there or is that not the case .

I think if you can’t cope with your dog’s medical issues (no shame in that by the way) then you should spare her the extra trauma of being kennelled at a rescue centre and have her put down yourself.

Oh dear another poster who doesn’t like anyone disagreeing with them.
I work in rescue and it’s hard enough rehoming young healthy dogs, a dog with expensive medical issues is not at the top of anyone’s adoption list.
Like a child? would you give up a child that has you up through the night?
I’ll stand my my previous comment, you havent tried everything as you haven’t even bothered chasing vet up.
I have 4 dogs, 2 have had serious medical expenses and at no point would I give them
up, just worked more to pay for it all and no I don’t have a husband to help so your woe is me is a fail; most posters on this forum have endured endless sleepless nights with children or perhaps pets.

If as you say your dog is like your child would you give up your child if he or she had an illness.
Lots of advice has been given but you seem to ignore it.

Bloody hell. It keeps eating my posts, it's driving me nuts!!!

I'll have to write shorter ones!!

Can/will she go outside to wee if the door is open or does she just go where she is? (Is that behavioural or medical?)

I guess the OP is just feeling totally overwhelmed and when there appears to be no answers it is a really difficult situation to be in. I dont think it is fair to judge when they are asking for help.

Do go back to the vet and let them now how bad this is for you and your dog.

If your dog has no control of their urine at all they should be able to offer aids to help you.

If it is a matter of training to wee in new locations then pm me and we can make a plan.

When you are exhausted and can see no way forward it is a hard place to be But do reach out to others who may be able to make things a bit easier.

I think either an outdoor kennel and run, or keeping her in a tiled room (kitchen) overnight with puppy pads that is easy to clean in the morning

Do you have any friends/family that would come and stay a couple of nights and let you stay at theirs. I think this would all be more manageable if you could get some sleep!

Make a list of what the vets knows is wrong with her& what medication she's on

Make a list of tests they want to do & why.

Keep trying ALL possible training labs/vet training/tv vets/ anyone that may be able to help. Really get on top of her conditions & what has been tried/tested here & overseas.

Can we have a photo -please 🤗

Do you work out if the home? If you do, can you afford any days at doggy daycare for her so a couple of times a week you're not coming home to urine soaked floors? And she has fun days with friends? Or borrow my doggy fir extra walks , a house with perm ant access outside?

Last comment then I'll STFU for a bit...

Be honest with yourself do you want to do whatever it takes (within your financial restraints) to get this sorted out or have you reached the end of the line?

Why don’t you just put a dog door in? It might not be allowed but no one could evict you over it. You can either replace the door when you move out or lose some of your deposit.

I did ask the vets if they could operate on what they know for certain/what they've Seen on the ultrasounds they've already done and what's within budget ie moving her bladder forward in the hope it'd at least make an improvement but they want to do all the tests/scans etc before they'll even give me a quote for the operation, I suppose they just want to do everyone in one operation.

It sounds more like they’re still not entirely sure what the actual issue is.
Are you going ahead with the further tests/scans?