Separation anxiety in rescue dog

[DaisyChainsForever]

We've had our dog just over 2.5 years, she was 1.5 years old when we got her. We are her 3rd home and were told the reason she was rehomed both times before was because she was too lively.
She is a lively dog, but that's fine because ddog1 is also quite lively so they entertain each other.
Our big problem with her is her separation anxiety. This has 2 main ways of displaying itself, the 1st being howling/crying/being destructive if left on her own (which only happens once in a blue moon when ddog1 needs to go to the vets). The 2nd involves her weeing, pooing and being sick in the living room if i go upstairs/out (this happens when ddog1 is there). This morning there was 35 minutes between DP going to work and me coming downstairs, in that time she had 4 poos and 2 wees on the living room floor. Later on in the morning i took DS to the park for an hour and come home to sick, everywhere. We've had a dog specialist come to the house and she said it would get better over time... how much time am i supposed to wait?? 2.5 years seems like an age to me already.
If Anyone whos owned a dog with separation anxiety has any practical advice i would love to hear it

I don’t have separation anxiety with my dog but she is a stressful dog when routines change. She doesn’t have the severe reactions of your DDog so my solution might not be enough, but we use a thunder vest. It relaxes her and she falls asleep. They sell them on Amazon and are basically a knitted jersey swaddling for your dogs torso.

It might be worth a shot.

We've had a dog specialist come to the house and she said it would get better over time... how much time am i supposed to wait??

What did the behaviourist advise? Separation anxiety is really hard to deal with and basically you can't leave them alone at all whilst you're sorting it, so if you're regularly leaving her then the anxiety is getting worse not better.

You need to deal with it in a very methodical and boring way, and it will take loads of hard work and maybe never be absolutely cured.

The behaviourist advised working up to longer periods over time, as she got used to being left. i can't even go upstairs to hang the washing up for 10 minutes tho without her reacting. So If i can't even leave her for 10 minutes, how am i supposed to ever 'build up' to longer.
A thunder jacket hasn't been suggested before, but at the moment i fear it would become another trigger, ie when i currently tell them to go out for a wee when i'm about to go out ddog2 refuses to go out as she knows what it means.

“ i can't even go upstairs to hang the washing up for 10 minutes tho without her reacting. So If i can't even leave her for 10 minutes, how am i supposed to ever 'build up' to longer. “

You start off smaller...

Whatever she can cope with, even if it’s 30 seconds - that’s what you build up from.

There are effective medications for alleviating anxiety in dogs, as there are in humans. Talk to your vet. No person or animal should have to live with that level of panic.

I would talk to your vet about medication and a referral to another behaviourist. If your dog is reacting that badly, their anxiety levels are most likely sky high 24/7 and they need help to bring those levels down before you can even begin to work on the SA. Medication on it’s own won’t be enough though, you will need to put in a lot of work as well.

It’s no good the behaviourist just telling you to build up the time left, you need a comprehensive, planned approach. Even with this it will be a long slow process and you may have to adapt how you live eg, take the dog upstairs with you initially and get someone to come in and sit with the dog when you have to go out or maybe find a daycare type settling if she is sociable with other dogs.

Julie Naismith’s website, book (Be right back) and Facebook groups are a good source of help, advice and support.

I had a springer with terrible separation anxiety, over the course of about eleven years we were eventually able to leave him for a maximum of two hours. He would just howl and mutilate himself, it was quite extreme. He was, however, very happy to be left in a vehicle indefinitely (obviously not on warmer days).

Things that helped:

Make sure diet is optimal, no icky fillers
Only try leaving once worn out from a long and exciting run
A tight fitting T-shirt to hug his chest - a child’s
Radio on at all times
Come and go repeatedly, ignoring him each time - literally just stepping outside and locking the door then coming straight back in, repeat in bouts of 5-6 times, multiple times a day, every day
No goodbyes
Never ever any hellos until completely settled (it needs to just not be A Thing, you come you go, it’s fine, no drama) completely ignore him
Leave an amazing bone or Kong or whatever is just the best treat imaginable near his bed
Hide little bits of food everywhere

I have a new rescue dog now and she’s responding much more quickly, she has a less highly strung temperament. I would definitely consider a feliway type plug in and even medication this time around if her anxiety worsened though.

Have you tried crate training? I know not every likes it but it's been the best thing for our rescue girl. When she is left (even to go in the shower) she was destructive and crying and messing outside the bathroom door etc. We crate trained her (slowly) and now it's her safe space and she's much happier in there. They generally won't mess in their own bed so it helps with that side (though we did get some weeing at the beginning) and generally she just feels much safer as it is her bed and cave and she isn't pacing around looking for us etc.

Thank you everyone. Some good points for me to look into.
To answer some of the points, I will definitely talk to the vets once they are back up and running properly, they're currently only doing emergency appointments and all interactions are currently taking place in the car park.
She has had calming medication in the past, but it completely knocks her out for hours, making her seem drunk, so we stopped using that. We tried a couple of different brands, but will mention it to the vets. The plug may be a good idea.
She chewed through our metal crate in a desperate bid to escape and got her head stuck in a very small gap. We haven't used it since as it's now too dangerous. (Her and ddog1 do sit in it when we eat dinner though with the door open).
We do leave music on low for her, was advised by the behaviourist not to use the radio as voices/talking may upset her, so we ask Alexa to just play relaxing music.

My dog has separation anxiety and basically can't be left. I leave him for thirty minutes a couple of times a week and that's his maximum really. Otherwise he gets stressed and will bark and howl the entire time I'm out. Luckily he's not destructive too.

The main problem with separation anxiety is that every time you leave them and they get upset, you're reinforcing the idea that leaving is bad. When you have a dog with severe anxiety you can't just leave them for an hour to "pop to the park" - you either need to take them with you or arrange for someone to be with them. It is really difficult but it's the reality.

At the moment every time you leave her she gets stressed. You keep leaving her knowing she gets stressed is just going to exacerbate the problem. You need to work on leaving her and at first, that means leaving her for 30 seconds and building up.

For example when your DP leaves and you're upstairs you need to either come downstairs with the dog or let the dog come up with you. When you go to the park you need to take her along. Leaving her when you know she's so upset that she messes on the floor is not going to help her get better.

Whilst plug-ins etc may help some dogs a tiny bit - the reality is that you will not get anywhere significant with them.

Every single time your dog is left and she gets upset, it is reconfirmed to her that being left is a terrible thing.

So, as pp have said, you have to start with the amount of being left that she can cope with and never increase the level until she is ready.

The reality is that probably means 10, 20, 30 seconds right now. For dogs that have severe worry at being left, 30 seocnds is too long. It might even be you don't leave the room at all, just open the door as if to leave and then step back in. The starting point is dictated by the dog. When she can cope with, without being worried.

Pop her in a room, leave the room, wait 10 seconds, go straight back in the room. Repeat, repeat, repeat over different days, different times, different situations. It'll send you crazy with boredom and the ideal is that she is also bored. So bored of watching you coming and going that she barely even looks up.

Then in increase the time you are out of the room. 10 seconds becomes 20 seconds, becomes 30, 45, 60, 2 mins.

If she ever looks nervous or worried then drop back down a level and repeat some more, before slowly building up again.

When you have slowly built up to leaving her for a few minites in a room then start to put a coat on but not leave the house.
Coat and shoes.
Coat and shoes and approaching the front door.
Coat and shoes and stepping outside the front door.
Coat and shoes and staying outisde the front door for a few seconds.

You get the idea

It's not an easy task and I totally understand why most people, when faced with this, instead jut arrange their lives so that the dog is never left. It takes multiple repetitions (sometimes hundreds) and patience and time.

Other things that help support this process:

• looking at more general ways to destress the dog, e.g. sniffing games can have a calming affect on dogs so introduce those
• training, using the brain but also learning important skills such as to lie on a mat for a period of time before being released; over time this can be worked up to lying there even when you briefly leave a room
• erradicating other stressors in her life, such as making sure she only gets fussed if and when she wants or doesn't go on the types of walks she might not like etc