Why is it so hard to adopt?!?

[WestieW0man]

We've decided we would love to add a second doggy to our family. We have a 10year old Westie and two children aged 4 1/2 and 6. I wfh most of the time and we walk our dog each day at the large park round the corner from house. We have a large enclosed garden.
I am a qualified behaviourist, albeit human behaviour- the principles are the same!. Our dog is well trained, calm and sociable.

But apparently this is not compatible with adopting 95% of dogs up for adoption! I've been searching and searching and SO many dogs need an "adult only home" or to be "the only pet" in the household. Some even go so far as to say no males or females!

Is it just me or is this a bit restrictive in terms of potential adopters? I'm on waiting lists for Westie adoption but they won't let us adopt until our youngest is 5. And even then it will probably be an "adult only home" or something.

I don't particularly want to go down the puppy route, and I do understand the terms are to keep the dog and humans safe and prevent distress. But surely looking at individual family set ups and not having generic broad stroke criteria would help?

Just feeling frustrated after looking through the rspca/dogs trust websites for the zillionth time!

If you're willing to look at rescuing from abroad then there are many rescues who will rehome to you. If you did do this then I'd suggest taking care to follow pages and see how reputable they are before you adopt.

I follow a number of them who seem good and am happy to PM you details. Wouldn't be a westie though if that's the only breed you like

Some dogs are in other countries but some are in foster in the UK

I found myself in the same boat. Nobody would let us rescue because we were a young, newly married couple and they assumed (rightly in fairness) that we wanted kids. They wouldnt let any dog or pup go to a house that had or would soon have a young child. I tried every shelter within a 20 mile radius of us.

I ended up buying a spaniel. 800 quid. It killed me, but 2 years on we have our dog and our child. They are the best of friends.

Have you tried breed-specific rescues? We had cats and an open garden but they actually wanted to get dogs into homes so took a more pragmatic view "What dog in his right mind would run away from this?"

Yes I'be applied to Westie rescue uk prior to lockdown, but as youngest isn't 5 until January they won't make our application "active".

I am considering adopting from abroad but I don't know if we would be able to see if our dog and the other dog got along prior to adoption? Need to do some more research.

Not fussed on breed- but I have experience with terriers, and I like spaniels and retrievers as well as mixed breeds.

This drives me mad, it's like they try and make it as hard as possible to rehome a dog! This has to be part of the reason there are so many dogs stuck in shelters!

The thing is they have to consider what is right for the dog, they will assess the dog and want to ensure they will be compatible with the right family and bit at risk of being rehomed again. I do get it, but I also get it makes it tough for those who have children, or other dogs, cats etc. I adopted my lurcher and greyhound from a breed specific rescue when I had 5 children under 6 in the house(youngest was 6 months) So it is possible, just need to find the right dog. Also rescues are mostly volunteers and get lots of enquiries and may have lots of people with the same criteria on their books waiting for dogs. I would absolutely get a rescue though, just keep looking at lots of different ones. The smaller ones seem less stringent on their criteria.

I just have to be patient I guess. sits on hands

A dog that is listed as adults only is usually a dog with a bite history or completely unknown history, I'm sure you'd agree that it would be irresponsible to re-home a dog that has bitten with children. A dog that is down as only pet usually has issues around other dogs or needs to work through a number of behavioural programs that just aren't compatible or fair on another dog in the home.

I would say in the future when all the lockdown puppies start coming in then there will be more dogs around that are suitable for young children. Or ask your local rescue to go on the puppy waiting list as puppies are rarely advertised on the websites. You will have to be flexible about what breed you would like as it's unlikely that the perfect breed that is suitable for young children and dog friendly will be available.

I wouldn't recommend the international rescue groups personally as they also don't know history most of the time but they go for the it'll be fine approach over the cautious approach of UK rescues. I have seen many of these go very wrong.

I would call the rescues near you and get yourself known, what your looking for, what you're willing to take on and what breeds/size and although they can't promise anything and it may require waiting, you'll be in mind if anything suitable comes in.

Look at many tears. They often have westies and apparently are a bit more open to children etc.

I foster for a rescue (and I can only speak for this one) but we always have good reasons for restrictions. Some dogs desperately need another dog for reassurance and to guide them that life is OK after terrible experiences. Some may have to be only dogs as they are afraid of other dogs or have a lot of resource guarding issues. Its really hard to be sure about dogs and under 5's as the dog only has to bounce over enthusiastically at a small child and the dog will be bounced back to us pronto. And you may say your children are good with dogs, but for a dog who has been through hard times, children are very unpredictable and scary. The male/female thing is very common- I've had dogs who are terrified of men, and for my babies we can usually turn it around with a lot of hard work (and with the help of my stunt 'hairy biker' and others where we live who dispense treats generously), but for an older dog it may never totally go.
Frankly as well, people seem mostly prepared to put more work into a puppy they have paid ££££ for than a rescue - we've had dogs bounced back in as little as 24 hours when people decide they 'aren't compatible with their lifestyle' 'make too much mess' or 'the kids don't like them' even with all the work we put in to match people to the dog

I agree OP. Yet my elderly neighbour who can't even walk as he has COPD and is hooked up to an oxygen tank constantly managed to rescue a staffy through the RSPCA 3 weeks ago?! His son comes to let it out in the garden 2 or 3 times a day, and that's it. But hey, as long as there's no kids in the house who cares!

One of my friends has a rescue dog who was specified no men. She thought it was ridiculous,
lied, got him anyway and so far he has bitten her partner 8 times and as her partners son gets older (he is coming up 9 now) he is starting to snarl at him. He isn't a small dog either, mixed breed about the size of a slender labrador. He could do some serious damage if he wanted to.

They dont want to make it hard but they are responsible for making sure that a placement is safe. If I adopted a dog and it hurt my child, I'd be furious, wanting to know why the hell it was allowed to be rehomed with children when its history was completely unknown. They're damned if they do and damned if they dont.

My brother adopted from a Romanian rescue charity and dog is lush! She was a bit protective of food to begin with but not now, gets on with other dogs really well, about the same size as a terrier and is just perfect! Definitely recommend.

I adopted a Romanian rescue too. Perfect dog - lots of groups of FB - be warned the dogs are very popular, make sure to talk/message the people running the rescue. You should get a home check (I did) through the rescue.

The dogs are getting snapped up very quickly, when I got mine a couple of years ago she was advertised for a month before I made my mind up, she would be snapped up immediately now because if the Covid demand.

A few misconceptions on this thread. A dog that is suited for an adult only home may not have a bite history. It may be a large dog an excitable dog, a dog that jumps up , a dog terrified of the noise that children can make.

OP as a behaviourist yourself you will recognise how much time it takes to assess a human or in this case a dog in every situation. To asses a dog to be safe will All children is a massive task and costs money the rescue just does not have.

Statistically dogs rehomed to famiies with young children many will be rehomed again hence the reluctance to home to them in the first place.

Most good rescues will support the dog for life and so has to be rule out situations that could be risky. Not saying yours is but it is in the higher risk category.

It is worth waiting for the right dog and the right rescue the fact the rescue is being fussy is actually a good sign for a positive lasting rehoming.

We rescued a Staffy whilst the kids were under 10 and we had another dog, so it is possible. The only provisions we had to make were to put up a fence to stop him going over our low wall and lock up our small furries for their own safety.

I would be patient.

The restrictions for rescue animals are there for good reason. We adopted our beautiful boy with a warning that he may not like visitors or men in general.

Luckily my partner doesnt have a gruff voice so although he was a bit skittish with him the trust has grown. He still only likes female visitors and heads to his safe zone as soon as it's too much for him.

Rescues have a criteria for a reason. If you put your name down you will be considered when there is a suitable dog there. The problem is its far too easy for anyone to go out and buy a dog and thats the exact reason they end up in a rescue. Rescues have to be sure they are going to a suitable forever home. Breeders on the other hand are all about the money. I got a puppy from a rescue he's beautiful and I got him as I have experience with the breed. I originally asked for an older dog but none were suitable as they were not cat friendly.

Rescues ALWAYS have very good reasons for the restrictions they place on rehomings and the vast majority do not have a blanket policy for every dog.

It should be remembered that a rescue does not choose what comes in; it's not like they can 'order in' a nice bunch of child/cat friendlies or dogs which can live with others or be left alone for extended periods. They have to work with what they have; if they have a whole bunch of dogs which aren't that, well, it is what it is.

They also have a duty of care (to both dog and adopter) to not put a dog into a situation it cannot handle and honestly, rehoming a dog from the re-homers end is not as easy as all that. It is in the least counter-productive and at the worst dangerous to take a risk.

Keep looking; get on lists; maybe volunteer. Check local rescues, breed specifics, umbrella websites such as the Oldies Club (they're not all ancient!).

Sure, you can get a puppy but just a gentle reminder: all dogs come from puppies, including apparently non-adoptable rescue dogs. If puppies were originally sold with the same care as has to be applied by rescue centres, there would be far fewer rescue dogs and indeed welfare issues in general.

Excellent advice here. Remember a rescue’s priority is a good home for their dogs - not making sure every applicant walks away with a new friend. If they don’t think a home is right, for their dog, it’s ok for them to say no.

Also, this year is mental. Not enough dogs have been handed over to rescue to balance out the insane amount of applicants. Dogs are being sold instead of handed over. Dogs are staying with families because work situations changed.

Dogs that are handed in that are ok with younger kids might get over 1000 applications! Rescues can really pick and choose out of an enormous pool of adopters right now.

The dogs that stick seem to be Greyhounds or dogs with more complex needs.

I’ve seen a lot of people “give up” on U.K. rescues and go for dogs from abroad but give it a year when dogs are being signed back over to U.K. rescues. You can already see dogs that would normally have been signed over, being sold on freelistings for stupid money instead, often for the predictable reasons of work situations.

I have also seen frustrated parents like yourself shout at rescues demanding to know why all these dogs need teenagers or older in the home. “Do you even test these dogs with children” one demanded.

Think that through for a second - should rescues just toss a toddler in with a dog and see if it gets savaged or not?! No. That’s not how you do it haha!

A rescue assesses based on the behaviour they observe while the dog is in their care and any background they have when the dog is handed in. If the dog is a live wire and has come in with no background whatsoever as it was stray - they’re definitely not going to risk with a small child. If a dog is handed in and has come from a loving family with smaller children and is only being handed over because of a work or housing situation - then yes they could rehome with small children but those hand overs are NOT that common.

It's a constant frustration that so many potential adopters think they know better than rescuers who have been working with dogs for years, generally with backup from trainers and behaviourists.

At the moment many people who would never have considered a rescue dog are now considering this option purely because a puppy is out of their price range.

For the first time ever rescues are getting hundreds of applications for dogs that previously would have had little or no interest. This does mean that there is more chance to get a good, safe home for the dog and realistically homes who work full time or have small children will get pushed further down the list.

We have had a great experience with an overseas rescue (from Portugal). Ask lots of questions about how the dogs are chosen - in our case the shelter in Portugal have a team of volunteers who work with the dogs so only send those with the temperament to be calm family dogs. They also guarantee to rehome any that don't work out, but this rarely happens.

OP we had the same experience. 2 adults, 2 adult children, someone at home at all times plus youngest who is 12 and dog mad, all day access to a very large secure garden and unlimited attention. Everywhere we registered we had the same restrictions; no children, adults only or no males (I have all sons).

We tried for a year and I then started researching buying a puppy. TBH we would have given a wonderful home to a rescue dog but were never given the opportunity. I registered and emailed a very famous dog rescue organisation several times and got no response.

I don't regret getting our puppy at all but our first thought was to get a rescue dog. One very positive thing about getting a puppy is that you raise them and can be sure that they have been trained properly. Our pup has been a dream, has been so easy to train and is adored by all of us.

I suppose because a dog in rescue might have already been through a lot of upheaval and may have behavioural issues. The rescues are maybe trying to avoid dogs being rescued then returned and adding to any issues.

Some rescues could be more flexible with regards to outdoor space/people working. Often a dog can be quite happy even without a garden as long as they get plenty of walks.