Dog for family's with children with autism

[givemebooks]

Hello, i posted this in the SEN section but was advised that I might get more advice and answers here!

Over lockdown 2 of my sons have finally received their confirmed diagnosis of autism, my boys are DS1 aged 13 and DS2 aged 9, we have known for many many years they had autism but the waiting list and such and lack of support mean we are only at this point now.

Apart from getting an EHCP for out youngest (DS1 has one already) nothing has really changed we have been an autism family for years!

For a few years ago we were at the jorvick center and saw a child with a support dog and it is something we have been talking about since

Now for "official" support dogs the waiting list is long and likely our boys have already missed the boat with age ( they prefer children to be aged 7 due to waiting lists),

So we changed tack to more of a fanily pet dog, leaving the support element but knowing that animals provide support and companionship in many ways no matter ehat!

I wondered If any family's have pet dogs the they use as emotional support and companionship for there children with autism? and if you can tell me a little about your dog journey, how they have perhaps help your child? How your child/children reacted?

Any and all advice would be wonderful and suggested breeds? Is there better breeds for temperament for understanding or not overly reacting to meltdowns?

We have both grown up with family dogs so the standard puppy and dog life is not new to us so no worries there!

Its just this step feels full of so many questions for us and we do not know any other families with dogs and children with any SEN needs we know our boys want this and we know companionship of the dog would focus on our youngest he is very vocal on feeling alone at times yet he has issue been around people or having others in his space, he has recently been through the loss of his guinea pig and the heartache he made me feel when he said he had no one now just broke me, i feel the best friend of a dog would make his world

Plus it is nothing we want to rush in to not that we could at the moment as rescue dogs are not suitable for family's with other pets (we have 1 cat) and new puppies well the cost has gone crazy at the moment and even without been set on what breed, we know we would want fully registered breeders and we are priced out of the market right now!! But any recommendations of breeders would be lovely

So sorry for the million questions! Hope someone can offer some help and guidance

I have a ( now adult) son with Asperger's. We got a golden retriever when he was 9, and it made a massive difference to his life - I still say that the dog was the first and possibly only thing he ever loved! That was in the days before properly qualified assistance dogs, and I did a huge amount of work and a vast amount of training with the dog, and with ds and the dog together, to ensure that it was a success. It was bloody hard work at first.

Since then I have been involved for many years with Irish Guide Dogs as a puppy raiser. The puppies (mostly Golden Retriever/Lab crosses) are all trained as firstly guide dogs, if not suitable then assistance dogs, and if they don't fully make the grade as either many of them are placed as pet or companion dogs with families who have children with SN but don't qualify (because of age of child or length of waiting list) for qualified assistance dogs.

Most of these dogs are exceptionally well trained; they usually fail because of simple things such as sensitivity to harness or not being rock solid in traffic. It's worth contacting any organisations near you to see if they have so-called "reject" dogs, as they all have different reasons for not making the grade and the rehoming officer will know if any of the dogs would suit you.

I have a lovely "reject" at the moment; great with kids (all the neighbours' children knock on the door and ask him out to play ). He was rejected because of severe separation anxiety and absolutely hates being left on his own, but would have been a fantastic companion dog. Many of my friends also have rejects, all of whom have become much loved family pets.

Oh my goodness. The absolutely worst think you can do is re-home a collie working dog.

I'm typing that looking at my mutt sleeping at my feet. Everyone sensible will tell you not to do it, they are right. I ended up with my loopy collie purely by chance. It's genuinely the best thing I ever did

However, my autistic daughters companion animal is her tortoiseshell cat. Apparently cats are no good in this role. I disagree, they sleep literally cheek to cheek every night.

My shitzu/Lhasa pup really wasnt that bitey or destructive. We had maybe 2 weeks where he chewed a bit of the furniture and he still likes to run off with socks and shoes, particularly sweaty ones!!
I call him out therapy dog, he's been a great comfort to friends/children who are feeling upset/down. Think its the personality not breed that will be important.

Do you know someone with a dog the children could visit and see how they get on with?

Cavalier - brilliant choice if you can get a healthy one. after a childhood of wonderful Cavaliers as family pets I have seen one healthy Cavalier (and one healthy Cavalier-Clumber cross) in the last twenty-plus years. The breed has been broken by over-popularity and a not-fit-for-purpose breed standard.

Staffy - probably an unpopular choice amongst those that don't know them and might be prejudiced. Borderline empathic in their ability to sense your mood and respond accordingly. Robust, and tolerant of childrens behaviour. Bond very quickly with new owners. For your needs you'd want a younger dog or a puppy rather than the typical adult rescue.

Breeds to avoid for your situation - small fashionable breeds (Frenchy, Chi, Dachs, etc), yappy breeds (Yorkies, poodles of all sizes), giant breeds (where the weight of the dog may make it difficult for your children to eventually control in public).

Thank you all so much, we are printing out every suggestion

To those that suggested offical places We have contacted every official support dog centre not heard back due to covid I presume, yet most have age limit of 10 and with our youngest been 9 and the world as it is we would reach the limit before the top of the i assume very long waiting lists.

For thise asking more info on our boys and how there Autism presents, My eldest aged 13 has Asbergers though this is now not offically diagnosed with our CAMHS service anymore so is diagnosed with ASD, he is very high functioning but prefers his own space and company his problems arise from lack of emotional understanding, dyslexia and dyspraxia. His stims are scratching (but he is getting so much better at understanding thisnis not a good thing) along with issues with clothing texture

Our youngest aged 9 has ASD and again is high functioning, he had meltdowns due to over stimulation and crowds which does result in crying and shouting, his stims are texture based he love sofy fuffy things so spends most of his time at home wrapped in blankets :)

We also have a NT 11 year old our middle son who is animal crazy wants to be a vet!

They have all been asking for a dog for over 4 years

Hi books,

We did a course with a charity 'Dogs For Good' that takes you through the process of choosing the must appropriate breed for your family and then gives training instructions and ideas for how they might actually support your kids.

We also found a breeder that specialises in therapy dogs to make sure the dog had a calm temperament.

We've just got our pup and it's going well, but it'll be another year before she can really do her job.

Happy to DM if you want more info.

@mariwhee that would be amazing, any info you could give would be great :)

When DS2 was little we rehomed a couple of lab/collie crosses. They were 1 and a half and had grown up with children. They were so perfect for him. When he was 19 we adopted a staffie cross and that's also been successful.

Thanks for this thread. I would love a dog for my autistic child. He loves dogs and I could see it being the best thing for him. But not sure we are ready for a dog in our family. It’s so hard!

I remember reading somewhere that Labs who start Guide Dog training, but don't have good enough focus to be working dogs get rehomed as family pets. Not sure if that's true or not but it might be a good solution. You'd get a young-ish lab with some training but was out of the nippy puppy phase....

Hi. Like mariwhee I did the course run by Dogs for Good. I posted this on your thread in SN chat:

We are a bit further on in this journey as we got a puppy a month ago with the aim that it would be a family dog but also help my DD who is 15 and has autism and anxiety.

What really helped us was attending a workshop run by the charity dogsforgood.org - look up their family dog service. I attended a course last summer and it highlighted for me what sort of support a family dog can give. Unlike you we have no experience of dogs growing up so lots was new for us. It was inspiring seeing the difference family dogs could make.

We had originally intended to get a rescue dog but were restricted because we need a less allergenic dog so were looking at poodle rescues. But they stopped looking at newer applications (like ours) because of lockdown. So we took the plunge and were very fortunate to find a poodle pup from a registered breeder not long into looking. (yes, prices have gone up crazily...)

We had been unsure about getting a puppy because of how full on they are and were concerned DD would be overwhelmed but we can now see the benefits too as we get to ‘shape’ the pup to fit our family. DD likes training him and getting results!

www.dogsforgood.org/how-we-help/family-dog/

DS1 has autism and various complex additions to it. 4 years ago we got a Labrador puppy, chosen because labradors have a good reputation for children with SEN, and she is the most amazing dog imaginable. She totally ‘gets’ both of our boys and knows that DS1 can become extremely anxious. When he has a meltdown she sits with him and cuddles him, and has even been known to lie on him giving him deep pressure! She’s just brilliant.

australian-labradoodles.co.uk/australian-labradoodles-and-children-with-autism/

We got a bedlington whippet for our disabled kids

We decided on a golden retriever 8 years ago when our ASDA son was 7 years old. Both my DP and I are from dog loving families and our son was actually quite scared of dogs. We knew the breed to be generally kind, gentle and to love human company. Best decision we ever made. We've since had a litter and kept a daughter and rehomed another female golden. Son is no longer scared of dogs, enjoys walking them for miles and readily accepts cuddles from them. We will have the breed in our family forever. Another good point is that they don't yap like smaller breeds. We knew this was important as DS cannot stand high pitched noises. Hope you find your new best friend x

ASD son! Not ASDA... Predictive text!!!