Thinking of returning my dog to the rescue

[HappyMealWithLegs]

I’ll start by saying I am prepared for a flaming. Didn’t think I would be in a position to write a post like this but here we are. I will try to put as much information as I can, sorry if it is really long.

2 and a half years ago we adopted our dog, he is now 10, he’s a greyhound. At the time I was able to work from home 3 days and go into the office 2 days, my daughter also worked from home 3 days and was at college 2 days, so one of us was around all the time and it worked out fine.

In April, 2 weeks into lockdown my husband had his hours cut at work. It was either take the reduced hours or be made redundant so he took the reduced hours and took on another job in a supermarket. We are down a lot of money each month. Husband is now working 6 days a week pretty much from 7am until 10pm. I had to increase my hours and am now in the office 5 and a half days a week (Saturday until 1pm). On top of that, my daughter changed jobs (in a bid to help out with money partly) and is working 32 hours in shift patterns that change. Basically, the dog is now on his own 6 days a week from 7 in the morning until I get home at half five. We sold my car at the beginning of May for a few hundred quid and that paid for us to get a dog walker to come in for one hour every day – this obviously is still terrible in terms of how long he is alone but was better than nothing. That money has run out now. I have to get up at five every day to walk him for an hour to try and tire him out so he sleeps when he is alone but I KNOW this isn’t a solution and I feel guilty. The guilt is making me feel sick every day.

Dog is now messing in the house (wee and poo ) because he is alone so much, not his fault but he can’t hold it. To make it worse our house is rented and I’m terrified he is doing permanent damage to someone elses property. Nothing is going to change – we are behind on rent and will have to continue working like this until we can get straight.

I feel like we have been backed into a corner and have to return the dog to rescue. I don’t know what I want from this post really. Has anyone done this? Am I the worst person in the world? The stress of the situation is making me ill – tough, I know, I took on the dog but I can’t see a way out of this situation without returning him. What would you do

CMOTDibbler - thank you for that. I didn't realise you were still on here! You helped me out massively with some advice years ago about the greyhound we had before this one.

Having reread and seen

“I know his chances of being rehomed through the rescue are tiny. He had been their longest stayer in kennels (2 years) when we adopted him.“

I really would try and get him in a greyhound specific rescue.

He came from a greyhound specific rescue. I don't want to name them but they are greyhounds only. Usually direct from the track or from illegal flapping tracks.

You can buy xlarge puppy pads. Cover the floor where he toilets in those.

Leave things for him to find during the day.

Leave the radio on a talk station for him.

I have 2 real old timers who have accidents, it is unpleasant but it's not the end of the world.

He'd rather spend his days waiting for you to come home than waiting in a rescue for another kind soul to choose him.

You are his people.

@HappyMealWithLegs - have a look on Facebook for any local corona virus support networks in your area. Loads of people volunteered to help out and someone may be able to help you with walking or doggy daycare in the short term

Leave things for him to find during the day

Leave the radio on a talk station for him

I already do all of these things. I don't like puppy pads, I think they just encourage the behaviour.

It isn't the accidents that are the main issue, I haven't said that at any point. He is desperately miserable and stressed being alone for hours and hours every day, and, although I am the one who brought him into all this, I am desperately miserable and stressed getting up at 5am, working 6 days a week, having my family working their arses off. I can't keep doing it and whilst it isn't his fault, it isn't mine either.

I'm so sorry your in this situation. You have done your best to keep your pup happy and it's obvious you care. If I saw on Facebook or in my local area someone in your position I would offer to have your pup during the day. (I work 2 hrs a day at a school but it would be company for my dog too) ignore the nasty comments no one could have predicted a pandemic!

Oh this is really sad. We have a rescue greyhound and he loves company - I'm sure would find the situation that you are in very stressful too. Have you a branch of the Greyhound Trust near you? They do take dogs back in having been in a home for while, for many reasons - owner illness etc. They try to rehome older dogs like yours into foster care first rather than back into kennels while looking for a new permanent home. In your position I would speak with Greyhound Trust or other greyhound charity and ask for advice and help. The current situation is bad for all of you. Good luck x

I think if you give it more time the behaviour and his stress might improve, his routine has changed massively over the last few months, dogs love routine, so a big part of this might be because of that, rather than him not coping with being alone.

I would be very reluctant to take him back to the rescue centre given his age and how long he was there when you adopted him. I would try taking him for a long walk after work so it’s easier on you and you don’t have to get up so early, set him up in one room and put some lino down so it’s easily cleaned, make him a den (a crate with blankets over and a bed in will work well) so he feels safe, leave a radio on, some puzzle toys and bones, then give it a few months, dogs are very adaptable, I think he’d be much happier with you even if he’s left alone longer than he should than being stuck in a rescue centre indefinitely.

Please don't feel pressured to reply to complete strangers on mumsnet who say they will have your dog.

To me it sounds like you truly do have the welfare and happiness of your dog as your priority, and if a rescue can provide an environment where he is exercised, visited and happy, I don't see why that isn't preferable. They may even be able to find him a foster until hopefully your circumstances change.
Best of luck OP.

I think you have no choice, to be honest. Don't feel guilty, you will be doing the best thing for the dog. There is a charity for rehoming older dogs, who found a lovely home for our older dog when it became impossible to keep him. He went to a lovely family with 3 boisterous boys which was ideal for him.

@HappyMealWithLegs

He came from a greyhound specific rescue. I don't want to name them but they are greyhounds only. Usually direct from the track or from illegal flapping tracks.

That's good, if its anything like the rescue I got my dog from, it's part of the contract, that the rescue are contacted if any problems, her chip is registered to them. I wish you the best of luck with getting this resolved. Its heartbreaking to have to do this for the family, with best intentions for the dog.

Do you know the app NextDoor? You might find a trustable person on there who would walk it for free.

Does anyone know if a residential home would be willing to have him during the day as company for the elderly residents?

I know you've said the landlord wouldn't allow a dog flap, BUT could you
A) take the existing door off its hinges and store it somewhere
B) install a new door with dog flap
C) when you come to move out, replace the dog flap door with the landlords own door

The landlord wouldn't be able to make deductions from your deposit for that, though you would have to consider the security implications around burglary etc

Why not contact the cinnamon trust? I don’t understand, are you looking for solutions or have you decided to send him back whatever?

A dog flap that's big enough for a large greyhound is also big enough for a burglar.

OK, being practical until a better solution is found, you need to stop him weeing on the floors before they are ruined with urine soaking in - and although you can say puppy pads encourage the behaviour, he will smell urine on the floor (even though you have cleaned it) and will go there again.
If he consistently wees and poos in the same places, puppy pads will stop damage. Or buy a couple of waterproof duvet covers and put them on the floor, they will protect it and you can wash them

@PineappleSquosh

Have him put to sleep. He won’t get rehomed at 10 years old and it’s kinder than the stress of sending him to a rescue. Don’t get any more dogs if you can’t commit to look after them.

Unbelievably cruel and senseless comment. People's circumstances change. NO ONE could have predicted COVID-19 and it has literally decimated people's livelihoods but hey, you go ahead and criticise someone for not predicting a pandemic 2.5 years ago when they got their dog. Ffs go away. We don't need people like you sticking your knife in.

@HappyMealWithLegs

He came from a greyhound specific rescue. I don't want to name them but they are greyhounds only. Usually direct from the track or from illegal flapping tracks.

That’s really sad that he’d been there two weeks then.

Years!

AvocadosBeforeMortgages

It honestly wouldn't be worth it because he just wouldn't go out. He has been known to walk into the kitchen whilst I am cooking and stand there and pee because the back door is shut. You have to physically take him outside, shut the back door, and wait while he pees. It hadn't been an issue because we were always there and the times he couldn't hold it overnight it was always dealt with in the morning.

Why not contact the cinnamon trust

The Cinnamon Trust are a charity for the elderly and those with terminal/life-limiting illnesses.

If he cannot get outside to toilet then he is going to go somewhere.

If he cannot get outside to toilet then he is going to go somewhere

Yes, I had figured that out, thanks.

The cinnamon trust can’t help, they’re for elderly or terminally ill people.

And a dog flap big enough for a greyhound is - well it’s just a door...

Oh and usually rescues will not take dogs rehomed from another rescue as they have to go back to the original one.

Honestly, if you’re already out of people to help out, I can’t think of a realistic solution either.