It's home!

[puppypalavas]

Got our puppy today.
Been about 8 hours since we’ve had her and I’ve got puppy blues already!
She’s doing ok toilet wise. Maybe 3 inside, 3 outside and a poo outside.
Got her confined to the kitchen at the mo and she’s got a playpen in here.
We’ve got a deep sided box for her for our room tonight.
We’ve put her in her playpen probably 5 times, for short durations, 15 mins or so.
Then we went to the shop to find a box for her for tonight, so we were out for 40 minutes.
She’s howls and cries and barks solidly in her playpen.
As soon as she’s quiet we go in and praise her. Sometimes getting her out and sometimes leaving her in there.
Every single time though she has barked and howled in her playpen until she’s vomited. She’ll be losing weight at this rate.
Am I doing the playpen thing right?

OP look at www.thepuppyplan.com for an age-staged guide to your puppy’s development and needs.

Puppy MUST be socialised do you need to take her out and about as much as possible - don’t leave her at home alone!

Think we’ve got everything sorted.
People to stay with her while I work, at least until she’s 17 weeks old. And then we will reassess whether she can be left for 2 hours while I work.
In fact I may get her a 30 minute dog walk during those times so she’s only on her own for 45 minutes either side of a walk.
She’s still very whiny in her playpen today.
The kids drop food all over the floor so I popped her in there while we had breakfast. I was 3 feet away from her the whole time eating and she still screamed the whole duration.
Hoping this gets better.
I’ve read that a kong each time they go in their playpen helps, so we may do this. She doesn’t want treats though, she’ll only eat her dog food so we will have to put dog food in the kong!
And we’ve had no sick today.
I’m here all day, and managed to get a dog sitter here 2.30-5 while I take daughter to after school class and do her school run.

So the good news is that if you increase separation periods gradually, then you should be able to leave puppy alone for an hour or so within a month or so with no separation anxiety. We started with ddog just going out front door , waiting for a few minutes, then coming back and built up very gradually so that he got used to the idea that we are definitely coming back.

He's now almost 7 months and can happily be on his own for 2-3 hrs although it would usually be a lot less than that.

DH and I both work, but took a bit of time off when we got him , worked from home a couple of days a week and have a dog walker who has him at their house for the rest of the time.

She’s so much more settled today.
She’s had about 15 minutes in total in her playpen asleep. When I’ve got her out, she’s just laid next to her playpen asleep on the rug!
She’s been to the back door 3 times and each time we’ve let her out she’s done a wee.
She’s been totally clean in the house so far today and she’s been up since 6am.
Clever girlie!

Ahh she’s a little star!

That’s good progress

Right, what exactly am I doing re this playpen thing?
So every hour I’m popping her in there for 5-10 minutes while I’m either pottering around the same room, sat next to her, or pop into the utility room which is about 6 feet away from her but around the corner (she can still see my feet popping out from utility room door) so I’ve not even really left the room yet.
She cries and howls for the whole 10 minutes. She hasn’t been sick though, and isn’t as vocal as yesterday. Although she’s still crying.
Do I just carry on doing this?
Does it sound right, 5 minutes per hour while I’m in the same room?

I’ve tried treats and toys in her playpen but she’s not interested.

If this is the playpen you left her in at the beginning you are probably going to need to take a step back and make some nice associations with it.

Is it big enough for you to get in and play with her? Can you leave the door open and throw treats near the door with her on the outside, then try treats just inside the door etc so she gets used to going in and out but not being left and shut in.

Then you can start moving onto shutting the door and stepping away for a few mins etc.

It doesn’t have a door. So can’t leave it open.
I’ve been throwing her a few bits of dog food in there when she’s in there and she’s not interested.
My husbands bought a crate today for the car so maybe I’m better off starting again but going with the crate with the door open.
Although I wanted to use playpen as it’s a bit more spacious for her!

I used a playpen that's very big, had a door and you can open it up to act like a guard when they are older. I use mine now infront of the wood burner in case he runs into it when hot. Might be something to consider getting if you are finding this one isn't working as it's an all or nothing because of no door.

Probably the reason why she isn't responding to treats or toys is that she is too upset for her to want them hence suggesting going back to just getting her used to be near and going in and out (although I appreciate that requires a door).

When my dog, who is now an adult, gets upset he closes down and no treat or toy will sooth him.

God this is hard work!
Going to take her for a nap in her big box while I lie next to her for a lie down.

I agree that she’s probably got negative connotations with the play pen. Is there an edge you can leave open to act as a doorway? Can you fit in there with her to play with her/soothe her?

Alternatively, could you block off an area of the room for her using stair gates or similar? (Where her bed and toys are.)

Right...
So breeder phoned to check how we are getting on.
He said we are going to end up with a pup with separation issues.
He said stick her in her crate from 11pm until 6pm. Totally ignore her all night long. She’ll cry for 2 nights and never cry again at night?
Also start going out from today for an hour at a time. Leave her in the crate and only go into her when she’s quiet.
He said if she’s sick, wees, poos, just clean it up in the morning.
He said 3 days of totally ignoring her and she’ll be fine.
Now I really don’t know what to do?
He’s been a breeder for 30 years and said the only problem he gets people call him about is separation anxiety when dogs haven’t been ignored when they are crying?

Also put crate in the kitchen, never the bedroom. Get earplugs, apologise to the neighbours and let her cry it out?

My puppy screamed every 10-20 minutes at night and the 2nd night I was advised to put her crate in the bedroom.. well there she was fine and now sleeps fine on her own now older. She doesn't have separation issues!

OP you have a choice as to what you want to do given your latest post.

Bringing up puppies is like being a parent in regards to everyone having an opinion on how you should do it.

I know people who do just what your breeder suggests. Whilst I don't advocate not letting puppies cry 'ever' neither could I do what your breeder said so I picked a way that I was comfortable with.

All you will get here is advice. All you will get in RL is advice. All advice will be different. Ask yourself this, are you happy to do it slowly or are you happy to listen to her scream the place down and be sick.

At the end of the day you have to do what you think is right and you are allowed to trust your breeder over people on the internet!

What he says goes against anything I’ve been told by any trainer or behaviourist (I enjoy talking about dog behaviour waaay too much!), but there is always going to variation in advice. I’m sure that’s normal.

I’m surprised that this is the only think people ring him about! Personally I find puppy biting and the fact that everything in your house gets shredded way more annoying!

We got it so wrong with our last dog that I’m really weary of doing it right.
Our last dog has awful separation issues for 10 years which really affected us.
Husband said give it 3 nights. 3 nights of our life and if it doesn’t help then put her back in our room.
He’s getting me ear plugs and he’s dealing with the kids if they wake up.

And like my husband said, we did cry it out with both of our kids and both have slept through since 4 months old. When they go through nights where they won’t sleep then we do 1 night of cry it out and they’re back in routine.

Goodness me

Puppies aren’t children, op!!!
Surely you thought of all this before you got the poor puppy??
You have just taken the poor baby from it’s mother and litter and you’re already leaving it. It’s scared, vulnerable and frightened. do not let the poor little thing cry itself out! It’s just cruel. I slept downstairs with my puppy for the first 2 weeks and she doesn’t have separation anxiety. You’ve just gotten a puppy - you need to adapt and change your lifestyle and habits for a while to make sure you puppy grows into a happy dog, if you’re not prepared to do that then you shouldn’t have gotten it.

Also, why are you waiting for your puppy to go to the door before letting it out? You need to be taking it out every half hour, after every meal and drink and after every play time. I stuck to this and my puppy got the hang of it within 48 hours.

I take her out every 20 minutes.
Plus every times she cries at the back door.
I really really don’t know what to do.
I know puppies aren’t children.
I’ve had a dog previously that didn’t cry it out and he slept in my bed. He then slept in my bed for 10 years solid and couldn’t be left anywhere other than my utility room or he howled for hours.
I do not want that situation again.

I would think that shutting your puppy up in a crate and ignoring her for 7 hours isn't going to improve things, as it is clear she has a problem already with being alone. Also you will be making extra work for yourself because you will be washing soiled bedding and possibly a soiled dog every morning. No puppy can hold itself for that long. I think the breeders advice is wrong. Your pup is telling you she needs company and reassurance. This is a stage she will grow out of quite quickly.
Many years ago I tried this 'shut them away and ignore them' thing. It did not work. The noise was horrendous and I had to think of the neighbours. The poor pup became so distressed it was horrible to see. The experiment lasted one night. Yet, a few months later, when he was a bit more mature and settled, he was fine on his own for a while, without crying. To me your pup sounds like she needs company 24/7 at the moment. It will pass. Be kind, she is only a baby.

What a lasting you're getting OP. Well done everyone! She knows she can come here for a bit of friendly advice eh?

Yes of course you can work in January for a couple of hours three times a week. Just build very slowly to leaving her

And ignore some of the more militant posters on here. Happens all the time