Talk me through the early days

[YoureAllABunchOfBastards]

BastardPup came home on Friday. He is eleven weeks. He is super chilled and sleeps well. All wees and poos outside so far, and he even goes outside of his playpen area to do them. He is getting more curious and playful - currently licking DS2's feet - but obviously sleeps a lot too.

DH has a week off with him now and then I am off for six weeks. What should we be aiming to do? Once we are al back at work he will be on his own two mornings and one whole day, but we are likely to use daycare/dog walker on that day. Planning on getting him used to being in crate alone in the daytime with door shut. I'd like to get him to walk on the lead if possible too - not for long distances but for school run etc.

Puppies are hard work 😀.

I am an advocate of crates but I wouldn’t crate a dog for that long time, especially in this heat, they probably want to move about a lot to find a cool place to settle.

At the moment he can go in and out of crate when he wants except at night. I think DH will put him in tomorrow for about five mins while he drops the kids as a starting point.

Luckily we've been able to have the French doors open all day so he can wander and find a cool spot. I think rain might be a newish experience given that he is so young and the weather has been so hot for so long!

You won't be able to leave him all day at 18 weeks old - or probably even half a day. He might be okay (as in, he might not get distressed) but I wouldn't expect an 18 week old puppy to regularly hold his bladder for that long. Ours is 20 weeks and while he holds it overnight, he still needs to be let out every 2-3 hours during the day to pee.

I also don't think it's fair to leave such a young animal on it's own. Please consider daycare or have someone come and sit with him for at least some of the time - he might sleep a lot at that age but he still needs to be let out to the toilet and letting him mess in the house (because there's nobody to take him out) will really set you back in terms of house training.

Otherwise, get lots of chew toys (we use kongs and nylabones, and ours loves pigs ears, ribs, pizzle sticks and antlers) and be prepared to tell them off for biting a lot! They're exhausting and hard work but my god they're worth it!

Worthwhile looking into doggy care now as most dog walkers near me either do half hour walks or hour long walks which will be too long. Our dog walkers do puppy visits instead, so come to our house and give her a fuss for a while and a cuddle and let her out they've started doing short walks and showing her their van. Only when she is quite a bit older will she be able to go on a full walk with them. Don't leave it until last minute to get this sorted.

I personally wouldn't leave pup shut in the crate. We leave crate door open but shut kitchen door

I went back to work when mine was 13weeks having got him at 8.

Whilst your puppy might seem calm and peeing and pooing outside now you might find once he is settled in and relaxes things regress a bit. Hopefully he won't but don't be surprised if he does so you need to consider how he will be if he isn't toilet trained or calm when alone. I know people leave puppies for hours/all day but it was very clear my puppy wouldn't have coped even months older than yours with half a day let alone all day. Whilst mine was left alone for a couple of hours he went to daycare who continued his obedience and toilet training.

Unless you have something concrete in place now I would look into daycare straight away as a dog walker won't be suitable as your puppy will not be able to walk far and daycare often have minimum age limits.

At 20 weeks ours goes to daycare when we're working (3-4 days a week) he gets his two walks a day there, lots of attention and the chance to socialise with other dogs and people. He loves going and bolts in to see everyone when I drop him off in the morning.

He's toilet trained (no accidents in a month), sleeps through the night and is generally a really great dog, but he still requires a lot of input from us and his daycare. He's nowhere near capable of being on his own for long periods, least of all because he'd mess inside the house if he was left more than 2 hours.

Will look at daycare ASAP. Mornings will be 8.30 til around 11am so will see what's best.

I'm more concerned about making sure he gets the right range of experiences

If you want him to get the full range of experiences then take him everywhere once he's had his jabs. He won't be able to walk far at all (5 minutes per month of age per day, a maximum of twice a day) but you can carry him around and he can sit at your feet in cafes or on your lap at the park and meet new people.

I took mine everywhere - to the park, the shops, lunch out, on trips in the car - he met loads of new people and other dogs (you'll get tons of attention with a puppy!) and he got used to traffic, sirens, different types of weather and farm animals, etc.

Things I wish I had done more of was getting him used to grooming/teeth brushing and noises such as traffic.

Also as soon as you are allowed out think about starting recall ASAP whilst they stick to you like glue. We left ours a bit late but managed to get it sorted before teenage deafness set in which helped in the long term.

Things I wish I had done more of was getting him used to grooming/teeth brushing and noises such as traffic.

Just as a counter experience to that, I did all those things with battendog and, in all honesty, I think I was too keen to do them all too early. He HATED being groomed and would actively fight against it. In the end I backed right off and as he has aged he has slowly started to understand it is just easier for us both if he sits there while I get on with it. Ditto teeth brushing and traffic. Sometimes they need the experience of age to help them through new stuff.

I wish I had remembered that it's not a race and doing nothing is sometimes better than doing something and it being a bad experience. Use your dog as your guide. What you are aiming for is many experiences which the dog finds pleasant or neutral. If the dog is having a negative experience (because he's just not ready for whatever experience he is having) then you're going too fast and it will do more harm than good. Think about brining a pup up as a 1-2 year job rather than feeling you have to do everything before the magic 16 week point.

That said, recall while they are still young is really important. Battendog was off lead (in large, secure fields) from about 12 weeks old when he would stick to me like glue, terrified I would leave him. As a result, he's been pretty good off lead throughout his teenage months. He'll be even better with time and age.

Remember, also, "this too shall pass" is an excellent phrase for puppyhood. They can develop some odd habits as they grow and learn and you may end up worrying that xyz is going to be forever. e.g. chewing shoes or barking at cows or digging the garden etc. Gentle discouragement and strong reward of the right behaviours mean they change as they grow. Put in the work and have faith they will come good in the end

missbattenburg I always wondered if BiteyDog was so rubbish at those things because I didn't do a lot in the early weeks just spent it trying to survive puppyhood but maybe it wouldn't have made a blind bit of difference

bitey the older battendog gets the more I start to think luck has more to do with puppies growing up into good dogs than any of us like to admit

missbattenburg I tend to agree

It's funny because in training classes Battendog was a nightmare. He was sooo distracted by the other dogs that he would never do as I asked, no matter how high value the treat/toy I was trying that week. I remember looking at the 'perfect' lab who would do every single thing brilliantly, including learning to leave something after just one attempt and thinking I wish Battendog could show a bit more of that (or even not just be a total embarrassment!)...

Then, one day, Perfect Lab's owner came in with a story of how he'd run off during a walk, would not come back and she spent 2/3 desperate hours trying to find him again. When talking to her she also shared how much he hated the car and would do almost anything not to get in. I wasn't glad she'd had such a horrid experience but it brought home to me that all dogs have something to work through - even the great ones. Battendog has never been out of sight for more than 5 mins and will travel happily anywhere in the car. He might not be able to ignore another playful puppy long enough to sit and look at me but that's just his issue to work through.

Which reminds me, OP. Make sure you see and focus on all the things your puppy does well, even when he is struggling with other things

How big is he? I used to drive FigPup to the supermarket (to get used to being in the car) and then just sit on a bench outside so that he could get used to seeing lots of different people, bikes, scooters, cars, etc. Plus lots of people stopped to pet him and say hello, which he loved. I also used to pop him in a backpack (unzipped and worn on my front), and carried him around on walks, school pick up, etc. This was all before he had his full lot of jabs, so he was exposed to quite a lot as a little pup.

One thing that's worth working on, is getting him used to being alone. It will take a while to build this up, so start sooner rather than later.