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First family dog

10 replies

RedLemonade · 09/07/2018 21:16

I’m just starting to look into all that’s involved in potentially bringing a dog into our lives and would love some advice.

We have 2 DC aged 2 and 4. They love dogs, especially the youngest and I feel it’s inevitable we’ll get one at some stage but I’ve never owned a dog and don’t know much about the day to day, though DH had dogs growing up. I just want to make sure we can take proper care of a dog if we do get one.

Theoretically I’d like a non-shed breed that’s happy around children obviously. I’m not too bothered about size though smaller may be easier if we have to travel with them or have them minded on occasion. We have a massive garden/fields out the back so plenty of space though neighbors have sheep so I wouldn’t want anything inclined to chase them. We also have lots of wildlife around and I’d hate to contribute to any pygmy shrew deaths!
I’m happy to do daily walks as I tend to do that with the DC anyway.

Youngest DC is at home with CM in mornings now but in the coming years the dog could potentially be home alone for 4 hours per day as I work mornings- is that too long to leave a dog on their own?

DH loves Havanese and I wondered about poodles but I’m open to suggestions.

Any advice on need-to-know essentials and on breeds that might be happy with us would be much appreciated. Thanks in advance!

OP posts:
Cath2907 · 10/07/2018 10:05

There is no such thing as a naturally non-sheep chasing dog! Not unless they are trained NOT to chase them. However as long as you have a fenced in garden that the dog can't get out of sheep in neighboring fields isn't an issue.

In deciding a breed it is best to consider the key traits you need. Good with kids, low or high exercise / training / stimulation needs, low or high grooming time needed, willingness to spend time alone, etc.. Once you know what you want you can research breeds. We have a Bichon Frise for example - small, non-shedding, theoretically low exercise (but I like to walk and he keeps up just fine), good with kids BUT doesn't like being alone (he is a lap dog) and needs daily grooming to keep his hair from matting. Apparently they are also tough to train but I have found mine easy enough.

Then you need to decide puppy or rescue. Rescue's often have restrictions on people with small kids or those planning to not be at home full time so if you go that route you'll need to look for some smaller local rescues or breed specific rescues who will look at you as an individual not just use a tick sheet to determine suitability.

Puppies take a LOT of time and effort (look at the puppy threads).

Either way dogs CAN be left up to 4hrs/day but not from day#1. You'd need to be home to settle them in at first for a period of time (how long that is will depend on the dog and circumstances).

Then there is the costs - insurance, vets, foods, groomers. Also the commitment.... they are your lowest common denominator.. Everything becomes "how do we do that with the dog?" You can't sit inside cafes anymore, you can't go for a non-dog friendly day out with finding a sitter, in this hot weather you have to carefully consider how the dog will cope with almost anything you plan.

They bring love and company and fun but don't underestimate the commitment needed from you to care for them properly. I love mine but having a dog can be a right pain in the butt on many days!!!

TheGoldenWolfFleece · 10/07/2018 10:07

Poodles are extremely intelligent. I know one whose owner has no children and they are home most of the day and constantly taking him out for walks and playing with him and doing agility etc and he still tries to find things to do for himself because he gets bored so easily. Like the poster above I would suggest looking at bichon because they are small sweet easy going dogs on the whole and they don't shed much. Can you trust your children not to bother a dog when it doesn't want to be bothered because it's important that a dog raised with children can get away to their own space.

RedLemonade · 10/07/2018 10:36

Thanks for the replies. We're weighing up the pros and cons right now- to be honest this is nearly a bigger decision for me than having another child because at least children become less dependent over time! So I want us to be totally sure before we commit.

I wondered about a bichon or similar for their easy going natures though I was a bit put off by the (alleged) difficulty training them.

The DC are surprisingly gentle with dogs and I would plan on having a room for the dog to retreat to when it wanted time out. The youngest is verrrry fond of dogs though so we might need to wait till she's just a little older so she can fully grasp the concept of personal space Confused

Lots more research to do!

OP posts:
TheGoldenWolfFleece · 10/07/2018 11:15

I would wait till the little one is just a bit older but use this time to figure out what you really want from a dog. Havanese are beautiful dogs but hard to find as they're not very well known. Have you thought about going to discover dogs? There's representatives from pretty much all dog breeds there and they can tell you about the pros and cons of the breeds. Id also suggest reading about clicker training to see if that's something you might be interested in trying - Ive had success with this in training both dogs and cats. Non shedding breeds tend to need quite a lot of grooming by the way. A short haired breed that sheds might be lower maintenance in terms of coat care however you'd need to be careful not to get a breed that's more likely to go after sheep.

TheGoldenWolfFleece · 10/07/2018 11:17

Shihtzu or schnauzer might fit your bill?

Ive got a soft spot for soft coated wheaten terriers - Theyre a bit bigger and more energetic but all the ones I've met have been lovely.

RedLemonade · 10/07/2018 11:38

I was looking at the wheaten terriers actually! They are beautiful dogs. The Discover Dogs meeting looks fantastic. I think talking to owners is definitely the next step.

I think you're right re the youngest- a little but older and she'll be much better and we can use the time wisely.

Thanks again.

OP posts:
olivetor7 · 10/07/2018 13:01

Wheatens are lovely, but they are unbelievably lively, bouncy and driven, but most importantly incredibly powerful and need a lot of exercise to be happy. Most long legged terriers need a good few hours of exercise everyday to reach their full potential. I really think Wheatens are more suited to an experienced household. They are amazing dogs but a huge undertaking and not for the novice owner. Have you checked out Tibetan terriers?

TheGoldenWolfFleece · 10/07/2018 13:12

All the tibetan terriers i know are extremely stubborn. Very frustrating to train them as they're very clever and spend most of their time figuring out how to get around you.

I know a couple of breeders and there's a few in the family. They are very charming, beautiful to look at and sweet natured but not for inexperienced owners. Also they don't shed but their coats need A LOT of attention.

Bambamber · 10/07/2018 14:50

I have a puppy with a one year old and it's really hard work. They have to be kept separate at all times to avoid any mishaps. My daughter is fantastic with dogs but I never, ever leave her unattended at such a young age. At that age kids don't know when to leave a dog alone. Plus puppies have sharp teeth and can be very bouncy, it's an accident waiting to happen if they were left together. Neither would intend any harm, but pup has caught me a few times with her teeth and it does hurt. Never mind the fact the baby is more interested in the puppy's toys and the puppy is more interested in the baby toys, but puppy does more damage. And you put something out of reach of the puppy, so the baby climbs up and gets it down for puppy, or the puppy distracts you while the baby does something she's not supposed to, bloody smart arses Grin

Dragongirl10 · 12/07/2018 23:11

Op research a cocker spaniel show type (this is important, avoid the working type as they are much harder to train and have endless energy)

They are gentle, medium size and easy to train, they are fairly energetic but not manic.

The issue of the sheep is important, do not expect to be able to take ANY dog into a field of sheep, they will want to chase and a farmer has every right to shoot a dog worrying sheep, ensure your fencing is very good.

Time for the first 6 months is the biggest challenge, you need to be home almost all the time and be expecting to be toilet training,( should only take about 6 weeks max) general training, teaching dcs to behave around pup, this is constant....

It is essential to have a large crate in a quiet spot, baby gates absolutely everywhere, and time it so it is not the beginning of winter!
Muddy wet puppy makes everything harder!

Dcs need to be able to be calm, follow instructions, do as they are told re pup, and not react hysterically to nips!

The above is more important than age per se.

Ideally get a book and 'train' dcs on their behavior around a dog, teach them dos and don'ts ahead of pup arriving, and the importance of following instructions when pup arrives....this will make your life so much easier.

When my 2 dcs came along 16 months apart, l had a 5 yr old Weimaraner, and a Dh who worked away, I can truthfully say micro organisation and routine is the key!

Secure playroom (with door gates) for toys, that dog does not enter...this will stop pup swallowing toys too, train DCs to keep toys inside too!

Ideally a small space/utility with a gate to put pup in addition to crate..

Then you can walk away/cook/open the front door/visit loo safely ...

I spent an awful lot of time keeping dcs and dog seperate, but having those spaces made it all possible and avoided safety issues.

Of course you cannot shut away a pup for more than a very short time,( ie a few minutes) but you do need to be able to, briefly and easily several times a day with small Dcs.

Also you need to plan exercise, puppies need several short walks, how will you do that with dcs?

I had a Big Phil and Teds double stroller, but as you have a 4 yr old you need to think about her/his obedience whilst walking with a puppy......reins for all!!?!

All the stuff above aside the best memories my dcs have ( 10and 12 now) all involve our lovely dogs...

Now my ds 10 has his own spaniel who he walks locally on his own at 6.30 am and 4.20 pm daily, has trained, feeds and is inordinately proud of..
.having dogs has taught my dcs, patience, self control, discipline and responsibility and brings us all such joy and fun, although no slippers....(we have yet to understand why eating slippers seems to be a trait impossible to train out)

Good luck

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