Oh help!

[GinGeum]

Please don’t flame me for this, I’m got myself into a silly situation which I don’t know how to get out of!

We have two dogs. The one in question is a rescue - we got her about 5 months ago, and she’s almost 6. She had lived with other dogs in her foster home, but didn’t get on amazingly well with the bitches there, so they asked for a home with a male dog (which we have). She has also been attacked in her previous life requiring stitches, but we don’t know any more detail than that. She wasn’t well socialised either, so has only been around dogs and learnt how to play politely in the last year or so (with foster and with us)

Anyway, since we’ve had her, she has been reactive on occasion to other dogs, and it’s clear from her body language she’s doing it out of worry rather than pure aggression. She is much much worse if she’s on a lead (which is fair enough) and worse with bitches.

So the problem is, I’m getting into a panic whenever there are dog walkers up ahead, coming towards us. I know this isn’t helping. I never know what to do. If I put her on a lead, she will go for the other dogs for sure if they are off lead. If I dont put her on a lead, and I keep her focused on my face with treats, talking, carrying on walking etc, she is normally okay, but may growl if one of the dogs comes too close. If the dog invades her space though, she will growl/bark/chase them off. If it’s a bitch, they normally growl/bark back and then it ends up with them needing to be pulled off each other. (She doesn’t bite or cause injury, they seem to just bark at each other rolling round on the floor?)

I’m so bloody paranoid about this happening, and paranoid I’m going to be told I’m a shit dog owner, that I now pick her up and move out of the way of the path until the dog owners have passed. I know this is the worst thing I could do.

I’ve given up asking others to put their dog on leads, because they either say ‘oh they’re fine’ or don’t hear until they’re so close it’s too late anyway.

I realise I am the issue in this situation, but I don’t know how to bloody calm down and leave her to it (which I keep being told is what I should do).

What should I do?!

I honestly think you are being too harsh on yourself and perhaps the best thing you can do here is try not to give yourself such a hard time. You are doing the best you can with the tools you have. You love her and are trying to keep her happy and safe. This is already much, much more than she likely had in her previous home so she is already winning.

Regarding other dogs I wonder if you both would benefit from building up to walking by them by starting at a distance. Is there a quiet park or field or area nearby where you are likely to see other dogs but do not have to be near them? For example, we have a huge field and when I want to work on training my young dog not to run up to every dog he sees I walk him off lead round this field and keep an eagle eye out for other dogs. When I see one I have the space to keep plenty of distance between us while I work on keeping my dog with me. Over time I have allowed us to get closer and closer to the other dogs as the training comes along.

The same thing might be useful here but for different training. If you can see when there is another dog at a distance you can work on keeping your dog close to you but off lead as she feels more comfortable that way. Give her lots of treats and praise (or toy play) and just allow the other dog to be in the distance. Neither she or you need to worry about conflict. Over time you can edge closer to the other dogs a little bit each time yours looks like she is dealing happily with the current distance. She builds confidence around other dogs and you slowly build confidence in yourself and her again. As you get further along you can then try introducing a lead (perhaps start again at a longer distance but with the lead on - and build from there).

In the meantime, for street walking where you cannot avoid other dogs then I think picking her up or crossing the street out the way is the best option to avoid undoing all your field training. In time you can bring the training into street walks but not until you are both totally comfortable in an open space with other dogs.

p.s. if it helps at all, as a dog owner I never think less of someone with a growly dog - I always imagine they are both just doing their best and that perhaps the dog has had some difficulties in the past that cause the fear. Don't think that all other owners of friendly, happy dogs are thinking you are a shit owner because that is simply not true.

Thank you so much miss, that’s all really useful advice.

We actually own most of the land around here, so I have been avoiding the public footpaths and walking where others aren’t allowed, which isn’t solving the problem, just avoiding it! But I could definitely edge my way closer to the footpaths with her and still be far away.

Today I was walking with a friend so we stuck to the footpaths, and I probably panicked because I have avoided that situation for so long. My friend pointed out that I’m really restricting myself by only walking on private land, because I can’t explore new places with our dog without worrying. She loves the beach/sea, but I dread going there incase there are other dogs there.

She is actually okay on a street path (we only have a short stretch to walk to get to fields) and everyone has their dogs on leads then, so we just sort of veer around each other and carry on. She pulls towards them but don’t all dogs!

It’s funny, our other dog is a terrier and can look a bit scary if he’s running/barking, but we’ve had him since a pup so he’s fairly easy going. Our rescue dog is a little cocker and obviously looks very cute, and our poor terrier gets so much more agro from other dog walkers, even if he’s being a star pupil and the cocker is growling/pulling/barking!

I've seen dogs in my area wearing coats with things like 'I am nervous' written in fairly large letters on them, and one who had 'I am training'. At least it gives the message that you really don't want other dogs coming too close; although I know those won't be seen by people coming from in front. And don't be afraid or embarrassed about shouting as loudly as necessary to other dog owners. No decent fellow dog owner will take exception to your loud call telling them your dog is nervous, although no doubt you'll still get some 'don't worry my dog's friendly' people ignoring you.

I'm always sympathetic to responsible people who are and trying to deal with a reactive dog and will make sure we keep out of their way. It's the bloody people who don't care when their dogs are annoying other dogs and who do nothing about it that I get cross with.

I agree you're giving yourself a very hard time. I have no issue walking past a growling barking dog as long as it is on a lead and under control. I have more respect for those owners for controlling their dog than I do for the owners with the "oh don't worry he's friendly" dogs that run wild regardless if I want them near me or not.

For areas with other people I'd keep her on lead. It's the only way you can really control the situation. Take some of her favourite treat with you (i take roast chicken) and when you see a dog getting close calmly move just to the side (not right across the street) and use the treat to ask your dog to sit and keep your focus. Once the dog has passed give the treat and lots of praise. If youre consistent your dog will start to associate other dogs with positive reward and in my experience of a walker sees you deliberately moving to side and doing this they are more likely to call their dog in. No guarantee, there are always some inconsiderate owners but if your dog is on a lead and there's isn't then there's is the one out of control.

Do you do much walking with her in her own? We have two dogs and they are very different to walk individually than they are together. I think they feed off each other. Our oldest is great when we're out, loves meeting everyone he sees and stays nice and clam. If I walk him with my other little diva as soon as she barks it sets him off as well! It might be worth trying to put some time in working with her on her own, especially if your other dog is a barker.

Are you in FB? If so join Reactive Dogs UK.

Have you contacted a good behaviourist?

I wondered about getting a nervous harness for her. She actually has a bright yellow harness, and when she used to wear it, people were better at avoiding us. I’ve never really put 2 and 2 together but perhaps they thought it was a nervous yellow harness. I might get that back out.

I also think people are less cautious because we have a second dog, so they probably think she’s fine with other dogs. And she can be! But she also cant be, and I can’t really throw her into the deep end and hope she will be fine.

Perhaps the rescue she came from can recommend a good behaviourist?

Defnitely recommend the yellow jacket campaign.

And it might just be rolling on the floor now, but my reactive dog got into a fight with another off lead dog and it cost me £600 in emergency vet bills.

Sorry, posted that before I saw the other replies!

I do walk her without our other dog, but I usually take a ball out then and then she doesn’t keep her eyes off me. I’m wary of doing that with other dogs about though, because I think she’d get possessive over her ball. Maybe not though. Our two dogs don’t really interact with each other on walks though, it’s weird. Our cocker is much more a people dog, and would rather run along with me, or keep coming back to me, than run around with the terrier.

Thanks for the Facebook page recommendation, I’ll have a look.

We haven’t contacted a behaviourist. I was discussing that with my friend today. I think I need one for me to deal with it all better, than for her!

Have a look at Yellow Dog UK. Info on there about the ribbon scheme to indicate that dogs need space.

Ursula that is my worry. Rolling around on the floor is bad enough, but I just can’t trust that she won’t do something more if she’s really scared, or if the other dog does something to her.

A good dog behaviourist for you is a very good idea. A large part of their job is actually teaching the human how to deal with things, rather than just directly teaching the dog.