I’ve lost my best friend 💔

[lauren890]

I had to have my dog put to sleep yesterday and I just can’t cope I cry all the time and I’m not really a crying type of person, I lost my job 18 months ago and am suffering from depression, she was all I had to live for, she would cry at my door every morning giving me a reason to get up, I also used to take her out for long walks which was the only thing that made me feel a little better. Today I could barely drag myself out of bed and just laid on the sofa all day, when I finally made it to the shops I went down the pet isle and just burst out crying left the shop and went home. I can’t ever think it will get any better. I’ve never had a big loss before in my family as it’s just me, my mum, dad and brother. I don’t really know what to do?

Crying is no bad thing, let those tears flow. It's so hard losing a much loved pet, how old was she? I know it doesn't feel like it now but you will feel better about things with time.

Oh my love, I'm so sorry.

This is the hardest part - the combination of the grief and shock. As a wise (wo)man once said - or words to this general effect - grief comes in big, towering, crashing waves at first, one after the other after the other in quick succession. The waves will gradually get smaller and less fearsome, and will start to space out. You can't hold back the tide altogether, but it will be manageable soon.

It's so difficult. They are only lent to us, really, and it always goes so fast. I know it's corny and of little consolation when she's only just gone, but she has only stopped breathing and gone beyond the door, as they say. By loving her and letting her love you, she will be with you as long as you are able to think of her. She exists in your imagination now, and not your living room, admittedly, but she is still there. In that sense, nobody can take her from you.

I lost mine in the Summer. It was very sudden. She wasn’t just a dog, she was another level and I can say that as we had/have another at the time. I felt awful and dreading the thought that one day it would be normal without her and now it’s starting to feel like that I feel guilty as fuck. I still shed a tear for her most nights (right now). She got me through my deepest depression and anxiety days. When they rear their head now I vow to battle in her honour rather than listed to the bad thought that want me to give in.

I gave myself 4 plus days of heart ache sobbing before I could function a bit more normal but still cried myself to sleep a lot.

Going to the shop? You get a massive well done because that in itself is a hard thing to do when you’re low.

Think of her, always with you, pushing you to take her out. You can still take her out. Just because she’s not physically there doesn’t mean she’s not with you. Get up for her, make her proud of you. But only do this when you feel ready. It’ll come and although you don’t realise it you’re already doing well. You never have to get over her.

My fantasy is to build a time machine so I can go back and visit her on a day when no one else is in the house and just be with her.

It will get easier

I wrote a whole long post but it didn’t post!

I lost my girl in the summer. She was more than a dog and I can say that as we have another. She got me through my deepest bouts of depression and anxiety. I cried for days, just wailing. I dreaded the day that it would feel normal her not being here and it’s now starting to get that way and I feel so guilty. I still crying most nights for her (right now) but it’s easier than it was.

When I feel low, I’ve vowed to keep going in her honour. She’s always with me and I want to make her proud.

Your girl will always be with you. You can go for a walk and feel her walk beside you. You can get up as if she asked you too. She’ll never leave you because she’s so deep in your heart.

The fact that you’ve already been to the shops means you’re doing better than you think. You got out! That’s really good!

Let the heart ache take you for a few days but then let it also be the reason you function.

It does get easier

Oh! It did post!

I am so very very sorry for your loss, I can’t even begin to imagine what you are going through, your dog must have felt so loved by you, I hope that can bring you some comfort in the coming weeks

middle your time machine comment made me cry, we all love our dogs so much but they literally break our hearts.

I’ll let you know if I build one x

I'm so sorry

Let me know if you need a time travel companion x

Oh, sweetheart. I feel the same about my dog and I’m already dreading the day.

I’m so sorry and I can’t think of anything comforting to say, except for the trite ‘time heals’. Sending you big virtual hugs and sympathy.

I am so sorry . You need to let yourself grieve for her.

Thanks everyone, I can’t even get out of bed today. USERXX she was 10 it was a massive shock as all my other dogs lived until 15/16 so I thought I had a bit more time with her. I loved her more than anything she never judged me her heart was just full of love. I’m really struggling to see the point of carrying on I know I have my family but one day they’ll be gone too and I’ll be all alone. Some times I wonder why we exist if life is so cruel.

Would you like to tell us about her, OP? I’d be happy to listen if you feel like it. I love all dogs. 💖

It's very raw right now and you are understandably distraught as you have lost your friend. Take it one day at a time.

Thanks HUSKY. I got her for my 18th birthday, she was a golden retriever so quite large and always with me she followed me where ever I went and now the house just feels so empty without her. I have millions of pictures of her on my phone and walls but it doesn’t help I just cry when I look at them. For the last 18 months since I have been out of work she is all that has kept me sane, I don’t have a single friend in the world, no partner, no children if it wasn’t for my parents I don’t know what I would have done.

She is so gorgeous. That beautiful, gentle face. 💗

My dog has got me through so many lonely times, too, while I’ve been facing similar problems to you. They make all the difference, don’t they? I feel like my dog lives inside my heart.

No wonder you miss that big, lovely darling.

She’s beautiful x

I think you need to let yourself mourn but there are ways to get out there and meet people even if it’s not an environment that you feel the pressure to chat. But cross that bridge later.

Can you go and stay with your family for a few days? Just so you’re not in your own x

Don’t give up x

I’m so sorry

It’s heartbreaking. Do what you can do.

And I agree with the PP who suggested still do things that you’d do with her. Just because she isn’t with you physically, she’ll still be with you. She would want you to get up and have a walk. Do it for her. When you just want to lay in bed, force yourself up for a walk because she’ll be up there wagging her tail when she sees you going.

She looks beautiful

Ahhhhhh, she is a beauty. Take small steps, try not to overthink things, just live for today. You are grieving and it's painful but in time you will be able to look back with happy memories, rather than the gut wrenching sadness. Can you chat to your mum, are you close?