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The doghouse

If you're worried about your pet's health, please speak to a vet or qualified professional.

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Original poster

Am I mad to get this puppy with a baby?

89 replies

Greyhorses · 03/08/2017 18:34

DH is no help and tells me to do whatever makes me happy.
I am not an inexperienced dog owner. I work with dogs so am not clueless but I can't decide what to do.

My dog died. He was young and silly and died unexpectadly. I had him from finding out I was pregnant with DS, so coped throughout the newborn baby stage fine.

I am so sad without a dog, although admittedly I have more time and life is simpler. Still, I miss having a friend, I miss the fun and silliness. We have another old dog who is also miserable without a companion, he has never been alone before. I miss walking them together and enjoying lovely days out with my dog and baby.

I really want another dog, a puppy as i don't want a rescue after the heartbreak last time. I want a specific breed from a specific breeder. She has a puppy available now that someone had dropped out of. The waiting list is usually a mile long.

My heart tells me to go now and buy the bloody dog. That it will make me happy and fill the hole left by ddog.

However, my head says I have a 1 year old son. DH works away a lot (part of the reason I got dog in the first place) and I will be alone with dog and baby most of the time. Can I train a dog with a toddler wandering around?

I can crate train and am experienced with dogs so that isn't an issue.
How would I cope with a bitey puppy and a baby- would the dog feel neglected?

On the other hand, babies grow, they go to nursery eventually...puppies also grow don't they?

If I don't get one I'm basically resigning myself to a dog free life for the next 4-5 years which seems so sad

Has anyone done this and it actually worked out.

Please someone give me a shake and help me decide what to do

OP posts:

tabulahrasa · 03/08/2017 18:54

I absolutely wouldn't have a puppy with a one year old...it's so not fair on either of them.

WhittlingIhopMonkey · 03/08/2017 19:00

Hmmmm, I was all set to say categorically no but you are clearly very experienced with dogs so actually do what you feel is right. My sister has a newborn and two highly trained beagles. People presumed she'd 'get rid' of her dogs once she was pregnant but like you she works with animals and is well able to handle dogs and a baby.

If you were inexperienced with dogs I'd say no, but you're not.

ThroughThickAndThin01 · 03/08/2017 19:01

No.

You need to wait.

Original poster

Greyhorses · 03/08/2017 19:02

Thank you Tabla. Can I ask why you think it's unfair?

Not disagreeing at all just want to get an idea of the pitfalls.

The last time I had a puppy many years ago I was working full time, I got ddog as a 10month old so missed the baby stage...now I'm home so more time than before however I also have DS!

OP posts:

smu06set · 03/08/2017 19:04

Go for it! It will be very hard but you know that. Just check the puppy has no health issues - that would be my worry with someone dropping out!

MotherPie · 03/08/2017 19:05

I really wouldn't get a puppy but I'd get an older dog. I got my dog when ds was 2 months old but she was well trained, a puppy and baby would be such hard work!

tabulahrasa · 03/08/2017 19:07

For the puppy, I wouldn't have had time to be doing things like housetraining while also dealing with a toddler, it's not even the other training so much as that one.

For the baby...the teeth, we all ended up cut to ribbons, I wouldn't want a baby to be getting played with by a tiny shark.

It's nothing to do with how experienced somebody is, or having a dog with a baby, it's just the logistics of a puppy with a mobile baby.

Wolfiefan · 03/08/2017 19:08

Depends. It took about a month of watching wolfie pup like a hawk to get her toilet trained. Literally every second.
I had to sleep with her for weeks.
She had separation anxiety so couldn't be left at all.
Puppy biting. She couldn't be near the kids off the lead for weeks.
Training is ongoing. We have done training classes. Can take 7 year old but not a baby.

Original poster

Greyhorses · 03/08/2017 19:10

Thank you Tabla. Can I ask why you think it's unfair?

Not disagreeing at all just want to get an idea of the pitfalls.

The last time I had a puppy many years ago I was working full time, I got ddog as a 10month old so missed the baby stage...now I'm home so more time than before however I also have DS!

OP posts:

Spanneroo · 03/08/2017 19:12

Do not underestimate how much harder the second baby is once you already have one to run around after.

My mum once said "When it comes to children, one plus one makes about five". She was not wrong.

Adding a puppy to the mix too will make it even harder, and it'll be your DS and the puppy that take the brunt of that because you'll be stuck to the baby for months.

Original poster

Greyhorses · 03/08/2017 19:14

Sorry double posted there.

I can see the downfalls outweigh the positives in most respects

It's my dream puppy from a well respected breeder, they have dropped out due to moving abroad rather than a problem with the puppy itself. The pup is 10 weeks and the last time this breeder had a litter was 3 years ago could be in for a long wait.

I have lots of time during the day it's more trying to make sure puppy does not snatch from DS etc.
As I said I walk dogs with DS every day and have never had a problem however I understand a puppy has totally different needs to an adult.

I really don't want another rescue, I've always had them but this time I want to do things right from day one...

OP posts:

Original poster

Greyhorses · 03/08/2017 19:14

No more babies planned

OP posts:

MaddeningtheUnhelpful · 03/08/2017 19:17

I got my pup when youngest DS was 1. They're 3 and 2 now and BEST friends, it's like they have the bond from growing up together. She's is a soft wee Cavalier though, they seem to be built to be friendly

Original poster

Greyhorses · 03/08/2017 19:21

Maddening do you enjoy making life hard too How did you cope with toddler and a dog running around together?

The breed is very family friendly but large!

OP posts:

parklives · 03/08/2017 19:22

I would say do it.
I a puppy can't be harder than having another baby can it? (And loads of people do that.)
Sounds like you have your heart set on it, and sometimes things happen for a reason.
If you wait too long your older dog might not enjoy having a pup around, your child might be in nursery/school so you might want to work ft, it sounds like this is a good time for you.

EmmaJR1 · 03/08/2017 19:25

Hello, we got a 3 month old puppy from a rescue then found out we were expecting! I now have a 3 month old son and a 15 month old puppy. She adores my son and follows me around to make sure he's ok, she doesn't chew anything that's not hers was housetrained before he was born and is very gentle. Obviously she still gets excited and has ongoing obedience training but it's worked really well, a lot better than I expect. It means I go out every day, my son gets lots of fresh air and I have company. If I'd planned it I would have waited to get a dog but as it happens my lovely puppy completes our family.

Original poster

Greyhorses · 03/08/2017 19:29

My first dog was 12 months when DS was born and that worked well, but I didn't have a mobile child and puppy teeth which is the worry!

How did you manage with things like toddler dropping food or food around a snatchy puppy? Obviously old dog would never take food but I expect a puppy will try its luck.

I will be taking it to work with me so have those days to spend solely with the puppy training etc. I would commit to training classes etc also.

I know hand on heart it's a silly idea I was just hoping I could make it work as I miss Ddog so much.

I would love to rescue but I train my dogs to run alongside horses and finding a rescue capable of that, coming to work, living with cats dogs and a baby plus living in family life is just too big of an ask for the majority of dogs. Add to that I only like one or breeds and it becomes impossible.

OP posts:

tabulahrasa · 03/08/2017 19:30

"a puppy can't be harder than having another baby can it?"

Honestly, I'd have gladly swapped the current dog for a newborn human when he was a puppy, you wouldn't have even needed to catch me on a bad day, rofl.

It's things like having to have the puppy on a lead so the kids could get out the door for school without bleeding as it was all just too exciting for him that you can't do with a 1 yr old...

sebashocked · 03/08/2017 20:21

Having recently been through the experience of toddler (3 years old) and puppy, I would handle on heart say don't do it. It's not just training the dog but training the toddler (far more difficult) - DS couldn't run around, leave toys or food lying around and going for walks together really didn't work -excitable puppy + excitable child meeting other dogs was a nightmare. Add in sleepless nights (thanks to DS and Dpup), hardcore toilet training (dog) and never being able to leave them alone for a second (risk of puppy mouthing too hard or unintentionally scratching DS with razor-sharp puppy claws or just knocking him over) ...you get the jist.

sebashocked · 03/08/2017 20:22

*hand not handle obviously

MaddeningtheUnhelpful · 03/08/2017 20:23

I was really really lucky with my pup, she was never nippy and always very eager to please at all times so easy to train. I used to just follow them around with dog toys just incase pup needed a quick distraction

smu06set · 03/08/2017 20:26

I've had baby and puppy, indeed my mum did the same when I was born! Plus dogs are great for cleaning up toddler food messes!

Original poster

Greyhorses · 03/08/2017 20:27

Thank you Seba that's really helpful.

Do you think it would have been easier when your DS was younger and more strap in pram-able as mine is now at 1 or would you have waited until school type age? Such a long way away but if it's the best option then I will have to do that

We are currently used to separating ddog and DS anyway as dog is big and knocks DS over however it would be a case of separating two rather than 1 which would be harder

OP posts:

Wolfiefan · 03/08/2017 20:30

You have to keep the dogs separate from each other. And from a very young child. You will have two to walk and a young child. I can't see how this wouldn't be a complete nightmare.

sebashocked · 03/08/2017 20:57

Honestly? I'd wait. 1 year olds become very mobile very quickly and spend a lot of time wandering around the house clutching half eaten bits of food and dangling toys which can be far too tempting for even well-trained adult dogs never mind puppies. Remember too that fully toilet training a large breed can take up to 6 months, in the meantime you'll be trying to stop your DS from rolling/walking in dog pee in the house or having to wrangle them both outside with you multiple times a day. Puppies are hard work but as a pp said kids are even harder.

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