Hello all, I really would appreciate some advice. I know there are some of you who work in rescue or have links with rescues and if it comes to this, I want what's best for our dog. We have not yet made the decision to rehome and we are working with a behaviourist to try to resolve the issues but I could do with some hand-holding as I am struggling with this. I'll try to provide a brief summary:
We got our mini poodle last summer, from a good breeder, at the age of 9 weeks. The normal early puppy phase passed much as you would expect although he has been very barky with other dogs since he was little (that's not the issue). For some weeks now, he has been displaying quite severe guarding tendencies and the behaviourist has given us training to do with him to try to address this. However, he is also now attacking us at random and actually bit me a few days ago in the back of my hand and left a puncture wound. When this happened , he had just come up to me and asked for a fuss and when he lay down to be stroked - as he has done multiple times every day since we have had him - he sank his teeth into my hand. If it had happened to dd (who is 13 and very good with him), I think I would have been looking for a new home for him but I don't want to be the kind of owner who gives up on their dog without trying every possible option first and I am now so upset and feel that we have somehow got something wrong or let him down.
Over the past few days, the aggressive behaviour has got worse and although we have been avoiding stroking him unless he comes and head-butts for a fuss - and even then it's a quick pat and hand away - he is now growling and snapping even without that. Last night, I was training him and after I'd clicked and treated for the final time, I put my hand down to give him quick pat and said 'Good boy'. He leapt up at me with his teeth bared, snarling and managed to rip my shirt as his teeth caught in it.
My mother does our dog-sitting and in the interests of context, I should say that the only reason we have a puppy and not an older dog is because she was quite insistent that she wanted to dog-sit for us. I spent a long time looking on rescue sites for an older dog with some leaving training, as I am out at work and there was no way we could have a puppy (I would only have left an older one for a max of 4 hours but that was far more do-able). My mother spent months insisting that we would be better with a puppy - no bad habits, train them your way from scratch etc - and was quite adamant that she wanted my daughter (whose dog he really is) to 'have her dog' and would happily dog-sit for us every day. I fear now she may have had a rose-tinted memory of her childhood spaniel, who apparently was perfect with absolutely no training 
Our dog has also been aggressive to my mother on several occasions and she rang me at lunchtime to say she is 'depressed' about facing this every day. When she arrived today - he is left for 3 hours then she arrives and this has always been fine until recently - he ran to the door growling and snarling, jumped up and tried to snap at her and then when she sat down at the dining table with a cup of coffee, sat on the other side of the room growling at her and barking and snarling if she went anywhere near him. I have some sympathy but she sets herself up as the world expert on everything and just keeps saying that he should be neutered. He hasn't been yet and we planned to wait until he was a year, although when the guarding behaviour started, we did ask the vet about doing it sooner. All 4 behaviourists we contacted before choosing one advised against it as it might make matters worse so we have held off for now. I should add that after he bit me, doggy was checked by the vet and there is no physical problem.
If my mother throws in the towel, we are stuck as I cannot afford to pay for doggy daycare every day of the week and I'm not sure that a daycare place would want a dog with this behaviour anyway. I am in tears typing this as my mother was extremely unpleasant on the phone just now - 'I said at the start you shouldn't have a dog' 'He needs to be neutered, why can't the behaviourist see that' - and I am also really pissed off with her although she has form for her convenient memory (that's another story....).
I don't want to give up on him but I am really stressed by his behaviour - I feel I can't trust him and don't want him near my daughter. It feels as if we cannot even stroke our own dog without watching him like a hawk and to be honest, that doesn't help as the change is so sudden. I feel like a rubbish owner and so sorry for my dd, who is finding it very difficult to deal with and who is now having more arguments with my mother - dd gets home before me and has to listen to a daily diatribe from my mother about the dog.
If anyone has any advice/thoughts about what we should do, I would be so grateful. I have emailed his breeder but she is Spanish and moved back to Spain at Christmas so I don't know if she would take him back , if it comes to that. I haven't asked her that but have asked if any of the other puppies in the litter have had similar issues that she knows about.
If we do have to rehome him, can anyone suggest where to start? That is our last resort but I would rather be equipped with some information now - out of all the rescues we looked at before for a dog, there is only one I would consider giving him to - or should we try a breed rescue? We will try everything we can with him before it comes to that.
Many many thanks to anyone who has got through this post - I'm really upset and have just poured all this out but I know there is really good advice on here