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The doghouse

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Original poster

Ideas please, I might be giving in!

26 replies

weegiemum · 09/03/2016 01:13

Dd2 (12) wants a dog. She's wanted a dog since she could talk! All she's ever wanted is a doggy friend.

We have a huge Guinea pig hutch with 5 Guineas (3 years and older) and an 18 month old cat.

I'm starting to think I could give in on the dog front (don't tell dd!!). I can't walk a dog as I'm disabled but dd2 gets up every morning at 6am even though she's 12 and says she'd walk a dog then (leaves for school at 7:45). Kids are in from school around 4pm most evenings. We have a large secure back garden.

I'm in the house all day 3 days a week and only out for 3 hours on the other days.

My disability means I couldn't manage a puppy, it would have to be an older house trained dog.

Am I crazy to even be considering this? Dd2 (other dc are 14 and 16) cries about 3-4 times a week because we won't let her get a dog!

OP posts:
MaynJune · 09/03/2016 07:49

Obviously I don't know you or your daughter, but generally I'm very wary about relying on youngsters to do the walking. Too often I've been told how much the child loves animals etc, but the reality of giving the dog a decent walk even once a day (and the dog will need more than that) in all weathers changes things. And of course they can't be aware of how tying a dog can be. I always say if the parents don't want a dog or aren't able to give it the care it needs, don't have one.
A friend's son, around fourteen at the time, was a very dedicated dog owner, but even there his mother did some of the walking. They had an active young dog though which you're sensibly not considering.

In other respects your situation sounds good for a dog. Any possibility of a dog-walker for a lunchtime walk?

MaynJune · 09/03/2016 07:52

Forgot about the other animals. I have no experience of ensuring the safety of guinea pigs. Would they be forgotten about with the novelty of a dog?

Original poster
weegiemum · 09/03/2016 07:55

The guinea pigs are mine so wouldn't be forgotten about! Cat belongs to us all.

OP posts:
insan1tyscartching · 09/03/2016 08:20

Could you foster a dog initially to check dd's commitment to walking him daily? That way if the walking doesn't happen you know a dog long term isn't for you. What I hope would happen though is that dd will love having the foster dog,walk him twice a day,you will all fall in love with him and your foster dog becomes a permanent member of your family.
We got Eric when dd was 11, she had pestered for years like your dd,she doesn't walk him very often (we already knew that walks especially in the cold and wet would be our task) but she loves him and it's lovely watching them play together,he will do anything for her,he's very much her dog.

Original poster
weegiemum · 09/03/2016 08:46

Where do you find foster dogs (I've fallen in love with about 10 on rehousing sites!!)? Sounds like a good interim idea.

I really need to rely on dd2 for the walking (though a lunchtime walker sounds like a good idea!) as I can't walk more than 100m and Dh works away 2 nights a week.

Flip I'm giving in aren't I?

OP posts:
Madblondeog · 09/03/2016 08:57

What about getting her to do the walking every day (without a dog) for say a 3 month period to prove she actually will?

I love ddog but at the moment wrenching myself out of a warm cosy bed to take him out in the howling wind and rain is not enjoyable.

diplodocus · 09/03/2016 09:05

What would happen if / when DD leaves home? It might only be about 6 years away, and she probably wouldn't be able to take the dog with her. I know this may sound like thinking ridiculously far in advance but you need to think about a dog being for life.

diplodocus · 09/03/2016 09:06

Would your DH be up for walking the dog the days he is there? Then having a dog walker on the remaining days may be doable.

Original poster
weegiemum · 09/03/2016 09:08

Byes we need to think ahead. Did already has plans to study close to home but of course we can't rely on that.

Dh and I need to have a good talk. We both want to make her happy but it's so important to make sure we make the dog happy too.

Why is this so hard?

OP posts:
chelle792 · 09/03/2016 09:11

You might just want to check but I'm pretty sure in some cases now you can get prosecuted if an incident happens give me a sec, I couldn't word this all in one sentence!. An under sixteen cant legally be responsible for the dog so you would be liable. Does that make sense?

Maybe I'm just wary because my boy has "potential" and needs to be under very close control but a youngster and many of my friends who have tried to walk him wouldn't be able to handle him.

chelle792 · 09/03/2016 09:12

By the way, I'm in the camp.of if you can manage it, go for it. Your house will be noisier, messier and more restricted holidays, etc but the joy they bring you and the joy you can give to a dog are priceless

MrsJayy · 09/03/2016 09:14

Im disabled i cant walk the dog my dds were a bit older dd2 was 14 they were great at walking him so dont dismiss that your Dd would walk a dog mine was 7 months when we got him a bit nutty but house trained if you want a dog get 1 but get it clear that it must be walked every day

MrsJayy · 09/03/2016 09:16

I have used dog walkers as well they come pick him up so that would be a future option

MaynJune · 09/03/2016 09:24

I wouldn't worry too much about what happens when/if she leaves home. You're intending to go for an adult dog so in six years' time it'll have slowed down and with the garden and a dog-walker it should be fine. Don't get a springer spaniel though, or any dog that's super energetic!

It's hard because you're being responsible, but your dog would have a lot more company than many, which is good.

BlackMarigold · 09/03/2016 09:29

Sorry OP, but I wouldn't let a 12 year old walk either of my well behaved dogs. Things can go wrong even on the most routine walk when animals are involved.

Other dogs and people can cause sudden unexpected problems that need an adult to deal with.

babyblackbird · 09/03/2016 14:28

I would be very wary of going ahead. Will you really feel happy sending your 12 year old out at 6:30-7:00 am in winter when it is dark ?? And I agree with pp that I have a gorgeous friendly lab who has been attacked quite badly twice whilst out walking and I still thank God neither of my children had to witness that let alone deal with it.

BlackMarigold · 09/03/2016 15:00

I had my 14 yr old dd with me when our friendly lab was attacked by an on lead rotweiller type dog. Completely unexpected, no warning at all. Dread to think what would have happened if DD had been on her own. I always carry Pet Corrector spray which makes a hissing noise, luckily it scared the dog into running away, lead trailing.
Owner was lying on ground with a shoulder injury as dog had pulled so hard to get to my lab.
DD was very frightened and it took her a long time to relax around other dogs.

Cheerfulmarybrown · 09/03/2016 17:31

I would be extremely wary if the 12 year old is the only dog walker. It will just not happen twice a day every day. Your DD will want to go to clubs see friends maybe ill etc then who will walk the dog.

I also would not let my 12 year old walk alone with our dogs - not that I don't trust her of my dogs its the other dog walkers that concern me!

tabulahrasa · 09/03/2016 18:07

I'd be a bit cautious about it tbh...firstly as someone else has said, are you ok/is it safe where you live for a 12 yr old to be out alone when it's dark? As for half the year it will be...

Is she mature enough to cope if a dog attacked hers?

Also, what would happen if she wanted to go and stay at a friend's house, or was away on a school trip? If there's literally no-one else to walk the dog.

Hoppinggreen · 09/03/2016 18:51

My 11 year old always wanted a dog and is not too bad at walks etc but I still do the bulk of the work.
She might genuinely think she will get up early to walk the dog but I wouldn't count on it.
Also, DD is only allowed to walk our dog close to the house so I can keep an eye out. She's very sensible but other dog owners etc aren't always

ChairRider4 · 09/03/2016 22:22

Hi op know you said walking a issue

Sorry don't know nature of disability
Would getting a mobility scooter or electric wheelchair be a possibility for you (know they come up on eBay )

I'm in a powered wheelchair and means I can walk my boy three times a day he is used to trotting alongside me

ChairRider4 · 09/03/2016 22:24

Yes it means in winter his walks slightly more limited (though we fortunate have wood area with paths near by ) but across fields in winter a no (use dog walker 1/-2 times week make sure gets variety

Wolfiefan · 09/03/2016 22:25

If you have a disability would The Cinnamon Trust help if needed.
I would worry about having a child walk a dog alone. What if the dog was attacked or ran off? (Worst case scenarios here.)

Roseberrry · 10/03/2016 14:23

I wouldn't let a 12 year old walk the dog alone every day, especially not at that time.

What about a breed that doesn't need daily walks? Would your disability mean you would still be able to play with the dog in the house?

lemonymelanie · 10/03/2016 17:49

weegiemum - are you in Glasgow?

The dogs on the SSPCA website are not the only ones - they dont put them up till they have been with them for a week - you need to get down there, and see all the ones which aren't on the website. There is a fab wee staffy at Cardonald at the moment - gorgeous dog, just wants cuddles and love- - honestly, don't rely on the website - go and see them. There are 3x more dogs there than on the site:-)

Also, don't wait till Sunday - if going at the weekend go first thing on Saturday - the dogs get reserved quickly at the weekends by families. I was told by a staff member there you have to be quick - it's not like it used to be, dogs waiting for months - they come in and out within a week often.

And you can ask their advice - the staff are brilliant :-)

This has been my experience!