Pregnant and fallen out of love with my pooch :(

[lilwelshyrs]

I've had my darling dog for 3 years. I rescued him from sicily in 2012. He was a stray - well he had been dumped - we found his original owner who said she had to give him away as he didnt get on with her other dog. The people she gave him to handed him to someone else and they dumped him in a marina :( When I first met him, he'd been chasing cars and had hurt his claw. All he wanted was his belly rubbed. I fell in love and with the help of some amazing people, got him across to the UK.

He is brilliant in the house - well trained, quiet. He's got quite anxious lately as we recently had our other dog pts :( he has only had 6 months of his life without another dog. He's 4 years old now.
I can't walk him as much as i'm struggling to do the long distances he needs but my DH and dog walker are doing lots to help :)

Our first baby is due in November and we are super excited. Our lovely doggy has been taking all the new changed quite well - he has moved from the boot of the car to a harness in a passenger seat at the back of the car so that we have room in the boot for the buggy. He seems perfectly content there and hasn't fussed about the car seat or anything!

My issue is exactly what the title says. I just dont seem to love him like i did 6 months ago. I find stuff he does increasingly annoying - like he always shows he's really submissive to me by licking his lips obsessively. When I come home, he is an explosion of anxious excitement and i try to ignore his desperation as i wait for him to chill out a bit.

He's not like this with DH.

When i give him food, he gets all submissive again and wont eat his food at all. Sometimes we go for a few days without him eating more than a mouthful.

I find him very frustrating :(

Has anyone else felt this way about their dog when they fell pregnant?

He is my first dog - i've grown up with cats. I also have a horse and when i was still riding, i'd take the dog out for long rides with me and we'd go galloping through fields together! We had so much fun!

Of an evening, if DH is at work, pooch will hardly ever come near me. If he does come up for a cuddle, he licks his lips obsessively and then wont settle. Last night i had him in bed with me as there were some rogue fireworks going off and i didnt want him getting scared on his own - he was fine with me then. He curled up near me until DH got home from work and popped him on the cushion next to the bed. We dont have him up with us very often, mind.

We use adaptil when we go out and lately he's been going to my neighbours for some chilled doggy time (she has a labrador and they get on really well).

Any advice would be handy. I dont want to not love my pooch :(

Oh bless you both, sounds like you both know change is coming and it's unsettling for you both!

I'm pregnant and due in November too but this is #2. Ddog was one when DS was born and had been my 'baby'. Naturally he's been relegated in the household pecking order and the initial settling period was hard (for all of us!!) but he's a legend now and sooooo good with DS.

Maybe try and accept that things will change, but not always for the worst. He'll still be your lovely dog, he'll be a playmate for your baby and you WILL all settle down into a new pattern soon. Don't beat yourself up about how you feel, as long as his basic needs are met ( and it sounds like they are) it's fine for you all to be in this transition period!

Good luck!

Pregnancy hormones are very very weird. It's lovely that you're recognising this and not blaming ddog.

It WILL come out right in the end. Please don't beat yourself up about feeling like this. It's daft how silly things (like liking his lips obsessively as you say in your OP) can wind you up, but, please, don't let it get to you.

Best wishes

You're bound to have anxieties but it will all slot into place. i imagine you felt very maternal towards pooch when you rescued him. now your maternal feelings are naturally bring channelled elsewhere.

He is most likely picking up on your anxiety but you may also smell different, being pregnant. Dogs are extremely sensitive to pheremones so this may be having an effect.

don't try too hard- you did a wonderful thing for your dog now he has to fit in with your family and he will.

Thank you all.

I kinda forget I must be a bit hormonal lol. It has definitely been since I fell pregnant. He has barely acknowledged anything baby where as my beautiful big dog knew exactly what was happening as she came from a household who had kids. She was super excited when she saw the buggy and would put her head on my bump. I guess he doesnt get it because he simply doesnt know!

And of course - i must smell different to him which would explain why he is fine with DH and dog walker.

I'm hoping it'll pass once bubba is here - at least after winter - i cant see myself being overly keen on walks in the pissing rain !!

I was like this when pg with ds. I went from someone who didn't even notice dog hairs, to being obsessed by them and not wanting the dogs near me. When ds was born, the dogs were relegated to the kitchen/dining room and I has serious thoughts about rehoming them as I just didn't seem to like them anymore. Thankfully it passed after a couple of months, and I realised there was enough room and love for both dogs plus ds. It's just your hormones and it will get better!

My dog changed towards me when I first became pregnant. He started being very disobedient with me and growling at me when I remonstrated with him. Dogs do sense changes like that. At least yours isn't being aggressive. You probably will find that it goes back to normal eventually. We had to get our poor boy neutered to calm him down. It did work thank goodness and he went back to normal.

I'm hoping it'll pass once bubba is here - at least after winter - i cant see myself being overly keen on walks in the pissing rain grin !!

Sweetie NONE of us are big fans of walks in the pissing rain...

But it gets us and our children and our dogs out of the house!

This is true!

Good job DH is doing most of the dog walking! I'll be aiming to get back up to the stables asap and back on horse back as soon as i'm able despite the rain
Also have some lovely helpers from Borrow My Doggy!

If it makes you feel any better, I couldn't stand the smell of DDog1 when I was pg with ds2. He honestly made me heave ALL THE TIME.

It was truly awful. I adored him just the same but couldn't physically have him anywhere near me in the first few months without heaving or actually being sick! The more i pulled away, the more clingy he became!!

It did pass- altho weirdly his dry food made me heave throughout the pg, but my aversion to him eased off.

Went entirely back to normal once ds2 was here. He was so good with him. DS2's first word was the dogs name. Loved that dog to the moon and back

I am in the same boat as you, due in November with my first, and I'm finding the old things I used to be able to tolerate (barking at the door excessively, being difficult with other dogs) very difficult now. I just get annoyed by him so quickly, to the point I will cry because I feel so stressed by him! I do love him but at the moment I find him a complete burden I feel awful about it. We do one to one training with a behaviourist regularly and she is being so helpful with him, I think it's what's keeping me going. Hoping it will get better ! Hoping for you too!

TeamStesdy, wow... That doesnt sound fun! One of my lovely dog walkers takes pooch for a whole day and he comes back smelling of her and I hate it... Makes me want to bath him! Even his blanket stinks of her house... it's not a nasty smell but it's strong and distinctively not our smell! Pregnant noses are daft arent they?! Lol.

Rebecca - I'm hoping it's what PP have said and that it's hormones and it'll pass. My pooch does his submissive licking when I put his harness on and when DH was home, i had to walk away out of frustration from it and let him deal with it! I've face timed DH to show him how mental pooch gets when i'm just walking around downstairs in the morning... I dont think he believed me until now!!

When are you due? I have 7 weeks left!!

My dog does some lip licking, and I too find this irritating ! But I know it's just him and how he is. Today's annoyance is he has just been caught eating poo. Ugh. It's strange how things change, I'm definitely blaming hormones, and I think his behaviour has worsened because he can sense the change, just hope it's not a sign of things to come and he will stop being an arse hole haha. I'm due on the 26th of November, there's probably about a week between us ! Be interesting to know how your dog copes if your little one comes before mine ! xx

Licking lips is a sign of submission I think. Ironically it's probably supposed to placate you as they're feeling unsure about the situation, but of course it's hard not get annoyed! Ddog is dreadful for trying to lick DS's face - I know it's because he's nervous of him (DS is 2 and ddog is tiny so much smaller and a submissive dog anyway) but it doesn't help the situation when I'm trying to keep the toddler off the dog and the pooch is lunging for DS's face with his tongue out!!

As a warning, ddog (who had been housetrained for a year) would pee in the house when DS first arrived. He found the crying very upsetting and would sit by the feet of whoever was holding the baby and look upset. We focussed on giving lots of reassurance and he would snuggle next to me still while I was bf so felt part of the family still. After 3/4 weeks I'd say he started to settle and was happy to chill out again. It's not easy having an extra 'baby' to worry about but worth giving them a bit of extra tlc. I also found having to get out of the house to do walks was very good for me once DH went back to work!!

Am due in a couple weeks. My situation is the reverse. DH and I are madly in love with our furry one year old with every passing day of this pregnancy!

Rebecca - will keep you posted!
Last night pooch cuddled me instead of DH! Amazing! So a little positive step... Eating poop is annoying and gross without being pregnant... Is he doing it since you've been pregnant? I hope he doesnt carry on! So gross

Boutros - yes, i thought it was a sign of submission. When i try and ignore it, he gets worse... It's usually when i put his harness on to go out for walks. He doesnt do it to DH at all!
Thanks for heads up re peeing! Did you do any preparation with him before your DS arrived? We've started to play sound effects of a baby crying and fussing a cuddly toy which is wrapped in a baby towel!
Yeh, i'm glad i'll have a focus and structure to my day to keep me active... Although where we normally walk, you cant get in through any of the entrances with a buggy as they're all too narrow or are styles or kissing gates!! So i hope bubba likes being in a sling!