Neighbours complaining has really upset me! AIBU?

[Tazzyduffy]

I have just received an anonymous typed letter in the post addressed to the 'occupier'.

Essentially the letter was complaining that my dog was tied outside barking between 14.00-16.00 on Saturday and stopped a baby getting to sleep.

I fully appreciate that this would be extremely annoying for the parents, however I am very upset that their approach is to send an anonymous letter. I don't understand why they couldn't call to the door to speak to us or put their name and telephone number on it. There is no doubt who it is, as there is only one house with a baby in the area.

I am an absolute dog lover and my dog is well treated, walked 3 times a day, very much part of the family and rarely left alone for more than a couple of hours. I am not only distressed at their approach, but also the insinuation that I am a neglectful pet owner.

This has taken a lot out of me and I would really appreciate others thoughts/ views. Would you ignore the letter or approach them?

did you leave your dog tied up outside and alone for those two hours? if so, can you understand how irritating that might be for your neighbours should the dog have been barking non stop during that time, regardless of however much you take it for walks /cuddle it at other times?
if you know who they are, drop them a note an d apologise and tell them you'll try and make sure it doesn't happen again.
in reality, the note doesn't in any way suggest they give a fig about what sort of pet owner you are, it suggests that you're being unneighbourly (& that they're sleep deprived baby owners).

Why was your dog tied up outside for 2 hours?

Barking dogs piss me off. A lot.

But yes, they should have knocked and spoken to you.

They are scared of you and your dog, you intimate them so they wrote a letter. I could be another neighbour, Fed up of you who is outraged on behalf of the baby and it's parents.

Why are you posting multiple threads about this?

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/2473828-Neighbours-complained-about-my-dog-AIBU-in-how-this-has-made-me-feel

ah. Because she wants a different answer?

Out of interest, how close to your garden is the neighbour you checked with to see whether the dog was distressed / barking during those two hours and were they actually home at that time?
I wonder whether the dog's barking is connected to the fact it is "rarely" left outside and was anxious about being so left?

I posted twice as wasn't sure which was best forum. Neighbour can see dog from her window. My dog would often be outside for an hour or two if weather is good and she has food, water and toys. I totally get that a dog barking is annoying and have worked night shifts in the past, so acknowledge how important daytime sleep can be. That said an anonymous letter feels slightly intimidating and makes me extremely uncomfortable in the neighbourhood. To the point that I've closed the blinds and am in tears. I don't understand why people can't be direct and friendly about these things. It has made me very uncomfortable in my own home.

Because you have a dog that could bite them and you could shout at them, their nerves are already fried from listening to woof, woof woof for hours and a letter is better than a potential fishwife row and dog bite.

so you appreciate how it is to be made to feel uncomfortable in your own home, for example by the noise of an incessantly barking dog. If you really do know who it is, write them a letter saying you now understand how they feel in that case.

I don't think your neighbours should have to put up with your dog barking, I also don't think you should be tying your dog outside for two hours when it is obviously unhappy.It's easily rectified though either keep the dog inside with you or stay outside with the dog until you have got advice from a behaviourist and addressed the barking.
I don't blame your neighbour for sending a note you have shown yourself to be unreasonable by allowing anti social behaviour on your property so why would they want to risk engaging with you face to face?

Just don't let your dog bark outside for two hours, simple.

If you are the type of person that thinks leaving a dog barking for two hours then they were prob to scared to approach u directly about it.

Why have you shut your blinds?

But WAS it tied outside barking for 2 hours? If so then your neighbours are justified. Don't know why you're feeling so upset about being called on it!

After we drop the kids at school, all us mums meet over the park with our buckfast. #classy

Whoops wrong thread with that post.

I wouldn't want to approach someone like you who thinks its ok to leave a dog out to bark, I'd be worried about your reaction.

Was your dog actually barking? What did the neighbours say?

I also wouldn't approach someone directly. They might be aggressive. Usually the type of neighbour who is a nuisance is not open to a direct and friendly approach. Although I appreciate this isn't true in your case.

Eg hello neighbour, would you mind not burning plastic in your garden as it's blowing in through my windows

Neighbour: fuck off

I don't think the issue here is whether they should have posted an anonymous letter is it? The issue is simply. Do you leave your dog tied outside and does it bark? If you are out, presumably you don't know if it does bark. If it does bark, you are out of order. Trying to get a baby to sleep in the afternoon is hard enough for some sleep deprived mum or dad. A dog barking its head off would make me crazy.

Dont turn this around on them. Stop the dog barking. Apologise. End of.