Need some bedtime puppy advice, as have messed this up ...

[Dieu]

Hi everyone. Hoping for some non-judgey advice for this fuckwit of a first time puppy owner.
We have a 13 week Shih Tzu pup. I'm finding puppyhood a bit difficult, if I'm honest, but he is the most adorable thing I've ever clapped eyes on and we loves him!
Thing is, I have completely fucked up any kind of a bedtime routine and I'd really appreciate your help on where to go from here.
For the first few nights, he slept in a cardboard box made comfy with blankets, beside my bed. He whinged and whined a lot, despite being placed on the floor right beside my bed (to be expected, I know). After a few very restless nights I stupidly decided to put him on my bed. Cue some quality sleeps over the next few nights. I foolishly thought that he wasn't peeing the bed, as it felt dry in the mornings. The state of my duvet when I last changed my bedding told a different story
So I then bought him a proper dog bed and again, put that beside my bed. Teddy has, quite understandably, decided that this arrangement isn't good enough and yelps to be allowed back on the bed. I keep placing him back in his dog bed, but this could easily be repeated all night long, as he's exceptionally stubborn.
Last night was hell on earth, as he was barking (yes, he has now found his voice) to be let up, my kids were feeling ill with temperatures and even when we all dropped off, my cat was miaowing to be let out. I nearly cried, it was such a low point.
Now, I can handle a healthy amount of sleep deprivation and it's to be expected. However, I live in a flat (main door, with its own garden etc) and I'm really worried/paranoid about the neighbours being kept awake.
I don't know how to proceed. A part of me thinks fuck it, if he's not happy beside my bed then I ought to just put him in his crate in the hall at night (he hates this thing with a passion and sounds like he's being tortured whenever in it), and another part thinks fuck it, I'll just buy a waterproof topping for my bed! I also thought I could place his bed on top of mine but I know what he's like, and he'll want to be on the duvet. I know I ought to persist, but I'm a bit OCD about trying to be a considerate neighbour.
If there's anyone reading this who has a new puppy or is considering getting one, please let this be a lesson in being firm from the start. That said, my pup has separation anxiety like no other animal I've ever seen, but probably didn't have the ideal start in life with his breeder (another story).
Thank you so much for reading and (hopefully!) replying.

I should add that absolutely no space in my bedroom for the actual crate.

Mine sleeps on my bed and has done since 8 weeks old he's never pee'd on the bed.
At first I would put him out and make sure he had a pee before bed then get up in the night to take him out again after two / three weeks there was no need to take him out in the middle of the night as he was sleeping right through.
If you want to let him sleep on the bedYou could try getting up and putting him out to pee in the middle of the night like I did with mine and a waterproof sheet in the duvet cover on top of the duvet will help in case of any accidents till hes sleeping right through the night.

Because he's pee'd on the duvet he might continue to pee on it anyway now so I'd get a cover for a new duvet and have him on the bed. Eric is part shih tzu and I know that stubborn streak, he gets that stance and only ham or some other tasty treat manages to change his mind. We were lucky with Eric and bedtimes though because he was the last pup to leave the breeder moved his mum out a couple of nights before we collected him so we got him home and he was used to sleeping alone. He is mostly lovely now and our first dog so we managed to muddle through and you will too. I found puppy days really stressful but he's so much more reasonable now and it's far more enjoyable these days.

Aww, thank you both so much for your helpful and supportive replies. I usually use AIBU on here, and was expecting to get a roasting for having been so soft in the first place!
I slept with him on the sofa last night (I was shattered and just conked out), and it was a great sleep! He doesn't seem to pee on there, and I'm not as concerned as an extra warranty I bought at the time of purchase means that I can get it professionally cleaned.
My duvet was expensive and a housewarming present from my mum, so I had it laundered (obviously!) but was keen not to have to replace. Hopefully he will think of it as a new duvet as he hasn't been up on it since cleaning, and it won't have his scent on.
Good idea re taking him out periodically through the night, and having a waterproof sheet (although I've only ever seen fitted ones, not for sitting on top of a duvet). Would it make a difference do you think, if I placed him on his puppy pad instead of taking out? I'd say he's more used to that, although encouraging him to toilet outside seems like a very good habit to start.
Anyway, I will try placing his doggie bed on mine and seeing how it goes with that.
Thanks again ... and pleased to see I'm not the only mug one to sleep with their pup!

Puppy pads will work just as well I used puppy pads on the nights when it was raining as ddog will not go outside to toilet if it's raining. It only took about 3 weeks before he was not needing to go toilet in the middle of the night. He still won't go outside to toilet if it's raining and he's just turned 2.
All my dogs have slept on my bed but he's the is the only one who by morning has managed to worm his way under the duvet.

My chi jack russel cross sleeps on our bed he's now nearly six months and is choosing to sleep by our feet not tucked up between us if it's chilly he wears a thin coat at night. He's never peed on the bed or anywhere near where he sleeps but he did pee and poop everywhere else I thought he was never going to get it , we started with puppy pads in the bedroom but now he's fine. What a nightmare for you but an unhappy whining puppy all night will make you more tired and won't help his separation anxiety. I would let him back on the bed and make sure to take him out in the night or at least take him to the puppy pad.

Thank you for replies! I am SO happy this morning. I placed his waterproof dog bed on top of my bed last night, to see how that would work. And it did!! He tried to get out a few times and sneak onto the duvet, but was happy enough when I popped him back into the bed (as it was literally right beside me!). Thanks again for your support everyone. It means so much when you're at a bit of a low point. I can now see light at the end of the puppyhood tunnel, and everything so much better with a bit of sleep.

Came back on just to see how you'd got on thanks for the update and well done

Thanks

Shattered this morning after persistently thwarting his attempts to get on the duvet. The fact that his dog bed is more or less on top of me isn't good enough apparently . Stubborn wee beasts these Shih Tzu.

Have got my puppy a set of pyjamas £5 in ADD A and he's slept thru on top of duvet for two nights maybe your baby is cold?

Don't think so, LG. He has the thickest of coats and keeps very warm. He just likes to be up close and personal!

That's the best kind of puppy