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The doghouse

If you're worried about your pet's health, please speak to a vet or qualified professional.

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Original poster

Is it ludicrous to think of getting a dog?

31 replies

DreamingOfAFullNightsSleep · 05/04/2015 19:58

I have a 4 year old and 3 year old twins and am a sahm. It is pretty busy and chaotic at home with the dc all being given young and all at home (DD starts Reception in September). She is animal mad and we ate going to get a pet. I had been thinking of rats- or rabbits as she's so keen on that idea. As a child and teenager we had guineas, rabbit, hamsters, mice and ponies. Simultaneously. I have never had or lived in a house with dogs

Having looked into the amount of work involved with rabbits in some ways a smaller dog would be easier for us. We do a fair few family walks and bike rides. We have a large garden which needs dog proofing anyway (to stop my sister complaining about her German pointer escaping when he visits!). The dog would easily be able to be incorporated into the family.

BUT we have no experience and young children. Madness?!

OP posts:

Lagoonablue · 05/04/2015 20:01

Yes. Dogs are hard work and need time for training. Does t sound like you have a lot of this.

Original poster

DreamingOfAFullNightsSleep · 05/04/2015 20:37

No, training time would be difficult. I was hoping for an older dog bit I guess not many dogs looking to be re homes would be suitable with young children like mine.

OP posts:

Original poster

DreamingOfAFullNightsSleep · 05/04/2015 20:38

*but
*re homed

I can't type for toffee tonight.

OP posts:

CandyAppleFudge · 05/04/2015 20:51

We got female dog when dd was 1 years old. It was hard work, but I don't regret doing it.

MostAmused · 05/04/2015 21:19

Dogs are a huge amount of work but it is possible. Have you thought about maybe borrowing your sisters dog for a few days or trying BorrowMyDog.com or something so you could have a go at it?

Letsgoforawalk · 05/04/2015 21:23

Dreaming our lovely new dog was assessed by dogs trust as being ok for a family with any age children. So they do come up, but you would need to be patient I think. It doesn't guarantee any dog as bombproof though and I think it is really important that they can be safely and comfortably separated from the kids should things get a bit frantic. It sounds like you have some space though so maybe a good sized fenced off area in your garden that the children are fully excluded from would give the dog a reasonable sanctuary? I know people recommend crate training but if you had space, with such young children, a more spacious sanctuary space might be better. (With shelter etc and drinking water if dog is in there for any length of time. )

Time for training is needed regardless of the age of the dog. You need to also factor in the extra cleaning and washing.

It would be one more small creature dependent on you for all it's care.

Have you chatted to any other dog owning mums that you meet? They would probably be good to sound out.
Whippets and retired greyhounds are often recommended as potentially suitable family pets. We have chosen a crossbreed of fairly indeterminate parentage that has 'high' exercise requirements and I'm quite glad my kids are old enough to stay at home while I walk the dog. They enjoyed this afternoons muddy walk round the nature reserve but if they had also come on the two hour walk I did this morning there would have been a massive teenage rebellion here at the suggestion of going out again.
Evesham greyhound and lurcher rescue get lots of lovely sounding dogs in ( like them on Facebook for up to date info on dogs for adoption)
Doghouse here is good to browse to get an idea of the issues and problems that people have with their dogs.
Do plenty research before committing.

WeAllHaveWings · 05/04/2015 23:01

The dog will need to be walked at least twice a day for up to an hour 7 days a week rain or shine. Also training. If you don't tire a dog out it tends to find its own entertainment..........

I wouldn't have managed that when ds was 3, never mind 3 under 5! You are either superwoman or slight mad !

Original poster

DreamingOfAFullNightsSleep · 05/04/2015 23:18

There is no way I can manage my sister's dog. He's lovely with the children- particularly my 4 year old who adores him, but he's obviously big and super fit and pulls like a train and eats everything in sight. Seriously. She's a vet and despite her knowledge and attempts at prevention the dog has already had a laparotomy as a pup and a recent hospital stay. She was recommending a smaller dog which would be happy with lesser walking which we could manage in the day with the dc (ie stop/start and hanging about mixed in) and lots of ball throwing in the garden- which is a third of an acre so space to run- with a few really decent walks a week too.

I will Google 'borrow my dog'. That sounds interesting. I've always wanted a dog but having some trial would probably be eye opening!!

OP posts:

WeAllHaveWings · 06/04/2015 11:33

Even small dogs (especially terrier breeds) need a least a couple of decent walks every day, rain or shine. Playing in the garden is no substitute for a daily walk which doesn't only provide him with physical exercise but also mental stimulation (new smells, sights, sounds) resulting in a calmer well adjusted dog.

Surprisingly bigger breeds like bull mastiff's and lurchers/greyhounds require less walking (but still need it daily).

Our dog (Labrador) gets walked off lead twice a day, once in the morning for up to an hour, then he sleeps for most of the day, then after work/before dinner another hour. In-between walks/sleep we spend about 20-30 minutes a day training, playing games, brushing etc. DS(11) loves his dog and plays with him intermittently but got bored with the daily walking/training pretty quickly.

Friends have a small Westie who doesn't get walked daily/trained and she complains he is on the go all day (because he is not physically and mentally exercised) and she needs to keep an eye on him constantly or he jumps/nips the children to play with him or chews anything he can find. She needs to shut him in a room (where he barks constantly) when ds/other dc visit.

I would not have a dog with young children unless I could commit to exercise daily and train regularly, as it is when they are not properly stimulated and trained that the problems start. Do not underestimate the amount of work even a small dog will be, they require a lot more interaction than a rabbit or gpig.

insanityscatching · 07/04/2015 10:07

We have a small dog, he's 9 inches tall,he still needs two good walks a day and a stroll around the block at night as well as daily training because otherwise he's like having a toddler on speed.
Dd was 11 when we got him and tbh I'm so glad we waited until she was older because trying to fit in ddogs' needs round young children would have been a nightmare.
Dd's old enough to stay at home if she doesn't want to walk in the wind rain and snow which needs doing no matter what. Can you imagine dragging your dc out in the cold and wet twice a day?
I would be looking for a pet that won't make so many demands on your time and energy tbh until your dc are much older.

popalot · 08/04/2015 20:17

Dogs are surprisingly hard work. I would even say they can be harder work than children. They need regular walks, training, lots and lots of cleaning up after them (spills, poos when they are ill, dog hair). They are great company but not if you think a rabbit would be hard work. Got to be honest and I'm glad you posted because it really doesn't sound like now is the time for you to have a dog.
When the children are older (8ish) and can help it might be time to reevaluate.

KiwiJude · 08/04/2015 21:14

Oh heavens, if you think a rabbit could be hard work def don't even think about getting a dog. Not much else to say really :)

Original poster

DreamingOfAFullNightsSleep · 08/04/2015 22:23

What I mean with rabbits is that they need large safe living areas, ideally to be out at dawn and dusk, kept safe from predators, integrated into the family so they are stimulated and not lonely- but rabbit proofing a room is hard work to have them indoors- hutch cleaning, litter tray training to have indoors (& outdoors tend to end up neglected) and often don't like to be held. So for what the children would hope for from a pet it's a lot of work, space lost indoors and outdoors for a safe, appropriate pen and they may or may not have a strokable, cuddly pet at the end of this.

I'm not a stranger to high commitment high maintenance pets having kept ponies which obviously need seeing to twice daily plus exercising, schooling and training.

I know a dog requires much more work with the training and walking than rabbits but then the company and affection from a dog is going to be higher than rabbits I think!

To be fair though I do think you're right and the dog should be a pet for the future. The walking isn't such a issue as dh and I both tend to exercise in the evening and we spend so much time out on bikes etx with the dc but training time would be a worry.

OP posts:

sanfairyanne · 08/04/2015 22:43

may i recommend guinea pigs? similar issues to rabbits but incredibly tame and friendly

BossWitch · 08/04/2015 22:54

It depends a lot on the breed. We have a golden retriever and she isn't much work at all. She was easy to train, is naturally very obedient, docile and willing to please. She is walked for ten mins first thing in the morning before we go to work, then for about forty mins in the early evening, then another ten mins before bed. She sleeps LOTS. I've been on mat leave since may and thought she'd want to go out more with me in the house all day but she takes herself off upstairs to sleep on the beds and is decidedly unimpressed if you wake her up. A rabbit would be way more of a pain in the arse!

BossWitch · 08/04/2015 23:00

Oh and we've not done daily training since she was about five months old. And even then it was more like half hour, often combined with her walk. She's trained. It's fine. I have many dog owning friends / family who are jealous of our dog's loveliness!

andrea315 · 08/04/2015 23:07

I have a dog and a rabbit ( house rabbit) and the rabbit is far more work than my dog ! If you are at home don't mind a bit of mess and mud and have the time go for the dog oh and my dog is a collie , but the rabbit even tops that she looks for trouble ! Bloody hard work

Letsgoforawalk · 09/04/2015 16:53

Lots of advice I've seen about training suggests short sessions (3-5 minutes) a few times a day as being the most effective.

Cinnamon trust may also be a way to experience having a dog around some of the time without the total commitment that having your own would entail.

Mummy23Monkeys · 10/04/2015 17:25

I definately think its doable, we have a Shih tzu who is just over a year old and I have 3 children ages 8,6 and 2. Had her since a puppy so all a year younger when first got her.

As a puppy she was definately hard work but I'm used to a busy household with 3 young children! The children adore her and she loves being with the children, if they are playing a game or something without her she goes and sits herself in the middle as she wants to be included (I think she thinks she is the 4th child not a dog )

DH walks her every morning before he leaves for work as getting ready for school is the busiest time for me, then she has a 2nd walk either in the afternoon or after school pick up (its a great way to burn off kids energy and even if raining they love getting wellies on and getting muddy!!)

The rest of the day we have a large garden to run around in and training I do a few minutes several times a day which is much easier to fit in. I have no doubt we made the right decision even though we were unsure before getting her.

Original poster

DreamingOfAFullNightsSleep · 10/04/2015 19:31

Thanks everyone for all your wise words. I am going to have a good think and discuss with my husband again.

I'm very tempted. andrea I have heard that and my sister (a vet) tells me we may as well get a dog than rabbits for work to reward ratio. I do think it is mostly doable. Come September my DD is in school and my twins will start preschool so there will be some opportunities to walk the dog after the school drop off and at least 2 days a week without small children and all the 2 steps forward 3 steps back that goes with walking with small children.

The next dilemma would be what breed to get

OP posts:

andrea315 · 10/04/2015 23:04

I think that's why so many rabbits get re homed! I came home today to find the dog asleep and the rabbit had found a chocolate bar a bag of crisps and an apple and had a lovely picnic! As for dog choice my collie is amazing but I have been very lucky! :-)

yummumto3girls · 10/04/2015 23:23

I think it's doable, I loved having a dog when the kids were young, he was my salvation, use to go out after kids in bed and enjoy the fresh air and peace and quiet. Ignore others who say they need two hours walking a day, a dog gets use to what it's given although obviously does need walking! If you choose the right breed then it's fantastic to have the dog grow up with the family. And as long as you accept it will all fall to you then it will be fine.

BossWitch · 11/04/2015 00:14

Can't recommended golden retriever highly enough as a breed that's compatible with family life. Ours is amazing, dd's little pokey fingers keep finding their way into her nostrils at the mo and she just sits there looking a bit confused.

Moults like crazy, however. Depends how highly you value a fur free home.

KiwiJude · 12/04/2015 00:34

Actually it was only when I was thinking about this later that I remembered how much work rabbits are. I looked after two rabbits for a friend a while ago and yeah it was a lot of hard work, so forget what I said earlier Dreaming :)

Dogs can be hard work though. Are you thinking puppy or older dog? Our first dog was so much easier as our property was fully puppy proof, and he was nowhere as needy as current DPup, whereas it wasn't until we got our current dog as an 8 week old boxer puppy (he's now 10 month old) that we realised how puppy-inappropriate our current place is. Now he has the run of the place as we still have electric fence unit from when we had the horse at home and he has very healthy respect for all fences having had a couple of blips at an early age. He can't figure out how the cat (his idol) can walk through the fence and not get hurt (neither can I actually ).

Chillycamper · 12/04/2015 13:57

We've come to dog ownership via fish, Guineapigs and rabbits. The Guineas are easier to handle than the rabbits but the bunnies were rescue. The bunnies were funnier to watch as they play with thier toys.

We now have 2 adult whippets which we re homed and they are much more rewarding for the children and us. DD is lying on the rug tickling thier baldy tummies now.

The dog bed is in the lounge and thier bowls are in the kitchen so it's much easier to remember to see to them the pets in the garden. My kids are older than yours but I love the fact I have to walk the dogs. I get in on work days and grump at the teens if the dogs need a walk but once I have pulled on my boots and we are over the field it is great. I'm fitter and slimmer which I hadn't expected.

Lots of peeps here understandably recommend caution as it is a huge commitment and not a decision to be made on impulse as shown by the number of digs in rescue. I remember someone in a rescue saying,
"Well, you can't have a dog because you haven't got a dog..." This made me hugely nervous about whether I could cope but now I wish we'd done it before.

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