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The doghouse

If you're worried about your pet's health, please speak to a vet or qualified professional.

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Original poster

Please reassure me she will be OK.

9 replies

Hakluyt · 28/07/2014 12:28

We "fostered" a relatives dog last June while she got through a difficult patch (house move, new jobs, new baby). Initially it was going to be for a couple of months, but it has stretched, and she is still with us, although she is still their dog. They now want her back for the summer holidays, and have asked if we will have her again in October. Obviously she is their dog, so we have to say yes- but please tell me she will be all right. Will she have forgotten them? And if she hasn't will she be really upset at leaving them again in October? And if she has, will she be upset about leaving us? And is it mean to let her settle in with them disrupt her again by giving her back to us? Am I inventing problems that don't exist because I don't want to give her back?

OP posts:

maybeIwillmaybeIwont · 28/07/2014 12:34

Ah, bless you, you have fallen in love with her! But yes, she will be fine, she was good before and she will be fine after. As to having her back in October, that's a bonus! You never know, they might find it easier to give her back to you for good in October and then she's yours, but either way she is loved.

chocolatelime · 28/07/2014 12:39

I don't think that it would be in the dog's best interest to be moved around like this. If they take her back then it should be a permanent arrangement, or not at all.

She will probably be fine if you decide to do this, but it will be very confusing for the dog - very unsettling.

pigsDOfly · 28/07/2014 13:11

What an odd way to treat an animal, it's not a toy to be picked up when it's convenient or they have the time or the inclination to play.

I imagine the dog will ultimately be okay but it's not fair to you or the dog and very unsettling all round. Could you suggest to them that you take it on permanently?

Sounds to me like they're taking advantage of your good nature. I hope they're paying for food and any possible vet visit while the dog is with you.

Floralnomad · 28/07/2014 13:53

I would tell them no ,they have her back and keep her or leave her alone ,as others have said its a living animal not a toy that you can play with for 6 weeks then dispose of . Presumably the dog has a routine with you and it's not fair on her . Are they paying her keep whilst she is with you ?

SpicyPear · 28/07/2014 15:24

I agree with floral. Their attitude towards their dog stinks and I would not be party to them treating this dog as toy.

Scuttlebutter · 28/07/2014 18:22

That will be extremely unsettling for the dog. Most rescues would bend over backwards to avoid this sort of situation for instance with fosters, because of the recognition of the damage it can do.

Dogs form strong emotional ties to their carers, and would find this sort of shuttling distressing and upsetting and confusing. I would also want clarity on things like where the microchip is registered, who holds the insurance, which vet practice (and who authorises treatment or emergency PTS for instance?).

WeAllHaveWings · 28/07/2014 20:57

19 years ago we were asked to look after my bil's 1 year old Doberman bitch for 3 months (his wife had died, and he was relocating 450 miles away with his 2 year old son so he was closer to his parents for support). It wasn't ideal us having the dog as we were in a flat and worked, but we did our best as it was only supposed to be temporary.

The dog wasn't spayed or insured. We ended up having regular calls with him asking when he was going to take her, and it will always soon. We had her 3 years! (we paid all food and minor vets bills in this time)

In the last few months we had her we had a offer from someone we knew to take her, they already had dobermans and lived on a farm and she would have been spoiled rotten, but he wanted to keep her as she had been his wifes dog, and he would take her soon.

She developed pyometra during a season and had to be rushed to vets. She needed a life saving emergency operation costing £000's. Phoned bil up to tell him and he said he didnt want to pay for it so just pts.

We went nuts. Told him we would pay for op now, but to get his arse up here and he can either take her or pts himself. He paid the vet bill and took her home with him 2 weeks later.

Based on my experience I would be insisting on a permanent solution now one way or the other (the longer you leave it the harder it will get). These people are taking you for a mug.

Who is paying for the dogs upkeep e.g. insurance, food, parasite control etc?

Original poster

Hakluyt · 29/07/2014 11:58

Oh dear- I've made them sound horrible. They aren't- they just didn't expect ever to have children when they got the dog, so their lives went on a very different course to the one thy expected.They have been paying the insurance- but I said I'd take on the day to day running costs. After all, we're getting all the pleasure! They do love her very much, and want their children to know her- which is why they want her for the summer holidays. I can see their point. I just want to keep her!

OP posts:

Floralnomad · 29/07/2014 12:33

I don't think you've made them sound horrible just not responsible dog owners - if they want their children to get to know the dog then they need to take her back and keep her ,it's not a good example for children to think that you can just have a dog for a few weeks then send it away until the next holidays . Could they just take her for a week or so whilst you go on holiday .

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