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Grieving Dog

8 replies

SweetiePie0 · 27/05/2014 23:21

My old Scottie boy died at the weekend and we are all devastated! Whilst the humans can cope, our remaining dog is heartbroken and has become very withdrawn. She isn't eating unless encouraged and just wants to sleep in his bed.

I took her out in the car today and she was sniffing their car bed like mad- hyper excited all the way to our destination.
When we got back she didn't leave the car and walked painfully inside - she has also started to chew her paw...

I am at a loss as what to do to help her?

Any advice?

OP posts:
hmc · 27/05/2014 23:48

Sorry about your boy Sad

it's hard to watch the other pooch grieving. Practical suggestions - vets do 'anxiety' collars which release a calming and soothing pheromone (sp?)

Less practical, more radical - when one of our dogs died (Feb) we distracted the other (and ourselves) with a new puppy within weeks of bereavement. Surviving dog still misses her friend I think but is definitely distracted and preoccupied by puppy's antics which have been a tonic (for her and for us)

MitchellMummy · 28/05/2014 06:30

We've given ours Ignatia when they've experienced grief. Whether that worked or whether time healed I don't know. So sorry for you.

SweetiePie0 · 28/05/2014 08:21

Thank you for your replies.

We are thinking that we will start looking for a pup in the autumn ... I have arranged for her to spend some time with my in laws dogs and see jf that perks her up a bit - seeing her like this is making me feel worse!Confused

OP posts:
throckenholt · 28/05/2014 08:25

Ours pined for the older one when she died (but he was only 1 and got over it reasonably quickly).

I would try and give her lots of quiet attention - lots of cuddles and gentle games and tempt her with food treats.

Hopefully before long she will cheer up a bit.

CEvert · 28/05/2014 08:55

We have two that are only a few months apart so not sure what to do when the time comes. Would it be fair on the new puppy if we do decide to get one, or would it get over quite quickly being a young dog when the other one dies? You are never quite sure how long some dogs will live for.

moosemama · 28/05/2014 11:22

I am so sorry for your loss. Sad

Our boy grieved terribly when we lost Oldgirl last spring. He was depressed, just lay in his bed all day, refused to go in the garden alone and started howling when left - even for just a 10 minute school run, as well as at night.

It's a complex mix of missing their friend and never having learned to skills involved with being on their own, which leads to anxiety.

I upped his walks and spent lots of time outside in the garden with him. The only thing that seemed to bring him out of himself was when we bought a fling and fetch and did lots of ball throwing so he could just run and run, but he'd go back to being sad and depressed as soon as we were back in the house. At one point I was walking him for four hours a day, plus ball throwing in the garden and clicker training sessions trying to both distract and wear him out.

We knew that we wanted another dog, but I wanted him to learn the skills he needs for being alone first, so did a separation anxiety programme with him before we brought another pup. We lost Oldgirl on 25th April and brought home Pip on 9th August, by which time Lurcherboy was more settled and able to cope with an hour home alone. He wasn't impressed with the pup at first and still isn't attached to him in the same was as he was our old girls, but he's definitely happier in himself and doesn't have any SA symptoms anymore, so it definitely helped, but wasn't the 'cure', iyswim.

Things worth trying are Pet Remedy or DAP and possibly a thundershirt to help with the anxiety. (Thundershirts have a 100% money back guarantee if they don't work and Pets at Home honour this, so it's worth a try, as it won't cost anything if it doesn't work for your poor girl.)

It's very early days for both you and her and she's bound to be picking up on your grief, as well as feeling her own sense of loss and grief. Hopefully she'll gradually become used to life without her friend, but it will take time.

Flowers
Owllady · 28/05/2014 13:31

I'm sorry sweetpie :( it's very hard.
Mine pined terribly for ours and a year later I got another dog to keep her company, it was not the same relationship though and she still missed the other dog. Unfortunately a year after we got the new dog, we lost the old one too. Although I am incredibly sad that I lost two dogs in less than two years, I do feel like the dog that was left never got over it iykwim as she was never the same but she was a very sensitive soul. I hope your girl is okay :)

murphys · 30/05/2014 08:38

Sorry Sweetie. We lost one of our dogs in March and our other dog has been the same as how you describe your girl. Just last week we got a new puppy and he is like his old self again. But he was so incredibly sad for the two months he was alone. I had never heard him cry since he was a puppy for the odd night, but he howled and cried for his brother. It actually made all our grieving worse I think. I am still not over grieving for him, I think as it was so sudden and he was young. I was adamant to wait 6 months before getting a new puppy but we got her now as I just couldn't bear to see him so sad. Although we tried to give him more attention and he got treats so is now overweight.. it couldn't make up for companionship.

Do you have a friend with a dog she knows who could come and visit?

Sorry for your loss.

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