Puppy Saga 2 - I want to kill my dog

[mumnosbest]

...and if it wasn't for the kids he'd be long gone.
My garden is a minefield of poo and holes, my sofa is almost unfit for human use, my laminate floor needs replacing and probably is covering a lake of dog wee, he thinks everyone and everything is a teething toy and I've had a doggy birds and bees talk with my 6YO DD as he keeps trying to hump her leg!

In short HELP! I'm at my wits with this dog :(

How much exercise are you giving him?
What does he have to do to keep him occupied and out of trouble?
Are you going to neuter him?
Have you trained a "leave it" command to use when he chews something he shouldn't?
Does he have plenty of things he is allowed to chew?

Pick up the poo, provide him with somewhere he IS allowed to dig, like a sandpit with buried toys and treats.

Humping can be over excitement, over stimulation, too much energy and because he doesn't know what else to do. I told my DD that ours ' bed dances' after food to get rid of energy, it isn't sexual.

House train him.

Teach him appropriate play.

So we can help: what age and breed is the puppy? How long have you had him and where did you get him from? Also, how much experience have you had with dogs and how old are your children?

The 2 links Lilcamper has put give good advice.

Puppies are like babies - they don't come ready housetrained or ready educated, we have to teach them what to do. It's not rocket science and training is fun for owner and dog so don't panic.

Finally, remember, the Devil makes work for idle paws [and teeth!] so exercise and appropriate play.

I feel very guilty because I don't like / love my dog. He is 11 months old and in secret I wish we had never got him. :(

All the dog brain-games meant to keep him busy he finishes in thirty seconds then is there again demanding attention. I train him for ten minutes then he's had enough, but he's not tired. What are you meant to do with the rest of the time to keep them entertained? He gets the long walks. He's so much hard work. I resent my time as soon as I get back from work is taken by him. I resent my evenings are entirely spent fulfilling his needs instead of having down time with the kids in bed. I do it, we go to classes, we play, but I'm not feeling any bond.

So I'm sorry I'm no help but I can sympathise, and people say they get calmer in time.

The facebook page that lilcamper has linked, please join the group, it's excellent, please consider joining, they have some super files.

Driveway - have you taught him to be calm? If you go on Youtube, go to Kikopup and watch some of her videos called 'capturing calm'. It's ok to have these feelings, I had them too, perhaps if you relaxed, and just let him chill, ignore him a little, then see what happens, he will feel less like hard work. I was the same, I felt that I had to do it right, when really, you don't. Perhaps he's overstimulated, have you crate trained?

OP - how old is the puppy and what breed is he? Read the links too, which are excellent. Puppies are hard work, they take over your life for a while, but whatever you put in you do get back. However, all that chewing could be a sign of stress, chewing is a great stress reliever for dogs. Can you elaborate a bit more?

OP - this sounds harsh but it sounds as though your heart is not in this. My gut tells me that you would be wise to re-home him fast.

Alternatively, be prepared to start again from scratch with him. He needs proper boundaries. It sounds from your post as though he has learned attention seeking behaviour i.e. he is controlling all the interactions with you. Remove all but one toy. Introduce other toys for controlled play sessions which you start and finish. Ensure there are no-go areas in the house. Only talk to him when he is calm and has all 4 paws on the ground. Any attention/play/food is rewarding to him so you must be in charge of when he receives it. Your children have to follow the same rules. He may well be humping legs to indicate dominance, so it is important that all family members are seen by him to be higher up the pack. Attend dog training as a family so they learn how to manage him.

Here are the 3 golden rules:

1. Reward good behaviour (with voice/attention/treat)
2. Ignore undesirable behaviour (walk away from it/him)
3. Interrupt unacceptable behaviour and remove dog calmly and voicelessly from the situation.

If you are prepared to invest more time, consult a dog behaviourist.

Low dogs are not pack animals and do not dominate humans' humping is NEVER dominance www.apbc.org.uk/articles/why-wont-dominance-die

I would suggest crate training too
I have had dogs for years but this one is the only one I have crate trained and by God it makes a difference
They are worth it you know

Lilcamper I stand corrected on dominance and realise that I am old-school. What a fascinating article! Thank you for linking it.

FWIW, I have to say though that I had a dog like the OP and clearly had an old-school behaviourist's advice. As a consequence I rigorously applied the above rules to my other dogs with great success. They are well-adjusted family pets.

Lowclouds - Yep, the pack theory/dominance stuff is a load of bollox, but it does sound like you rewarded good behaviour and ignored/diverted less desirable ones and you love your dogs . I do think dogs need calm, consistent boundaries, but not to be bottom of the pack. I am just getting going with studying behaviour and training, it's frightening how much old school myth is out there

We have a crate and it works brilliantly. Just now puppy ( 15 weeks) was hyper, running round like a mad thing, I put her in the crate and literally moments later she's fast asleep. The crate helps her settle.
Plus when I'm not able to supervise her she won't be destroying the kitchen.