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The doghouse

If you're worried about your pet's health, please speak to a vet or qualified professional.

Original poster

Is a dog out of the question

146 replies

feelinlucky · 14/11/2013 17:12

My 11 year old has always wanted a dog. It's just me and him and I know he would benefit hugely from us having a dog. But! I work and I don't know if it's fair to leave a dog on it's own most of the day. Ds is back just after 3 and I guess I could employ a dog walker. I would be happy with an older dog and a type that would be ok for periods on their own. I know next to nothing about dogs but I do read a lot on here and have learned such a lot about the responsibility. Any advice from those in the know would be great. Thank you.

OP posts:
ender · 17/11/2013 17:26

Beware anyone thinking of having two dogs so they can keep each other company/it'll be easier etc. It depends on the dogs, and there's no way of knowing till you've had them a while.
Could be twice as much mess, copying each others bad habits and a lot more barking - my 2 have to be put in separate rooms when we go out otherwise their noisy play fighting sounds like they're killing each other and scares neighbours and passers by.

Spero · 17/11/2013 19:28

That is very true - I was advised NOT to get another dog until my staffy was at least 18 months and then advised not to get another girl - my chihuahua is a neutered male. It seems to be working very well so far but obviously you have to think what the consequences would be if it wasn't ok.

I never leave them alone unsupervised, the chihuahua gets shut in his cage if we have to go out, but mainly because I think one of the cats would really love to get her claws into him if I wasn't around,

I did see a pair of lovely King Charles spaniels at one rescue - their owner got too ill to look after them. They looked very sweet natured and had grown up with each other, I think they were a sibling pair.

Original poster
feelinlucky · 17/11/2013 22:48

Hi all. So, ds and I have reached an agreement, we're having a cat :) ds has decided we're having a Scottish fold. I had never heard of them, goodness only knows where my son heard of them but now I'm completely besotted and in the circumstances we've agreed a cat is our best option given our current lifestyle. Don't google Scottish fold though. I defy anyone to view one and not fall in love :)

OP posts:
tabulahrasa · 18/11/2013 00:27

Scottish folds have a big health issue...here, just so you know when you start looking.

everlong · 18/11/2013 06:09

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Spero · 18/11/2013 07:25

I hope what ever decision you make it works out well for you and the animal. As long as you are genuinely thoughtful about the kind of time and money it will cost you, you should be ok.

Fwiw, I have owned cats for nearly 30 years and never, ever worried myself about what they are up to when I am at work. Sleeping on beds seemed to be the answer. I have always had a cat flap and they have come and gone as they pleased. Cats don't usually crave human company in the same way dogs do so they are an ideal pet if you need to be out.

HoneyDragon · 18/11/2013 07:58

I think a cat is a fairer decision in your son. He is getting older and more interesting opportunities will arise for him. It would be awful if he ended up both loving and resenting his dog if it curtailed him from attending after school events or trips away.

Spero · 18/11/2013 08:38

Sorry to keep banging the same tired old drum, but why does having a dog mean the son can't go to after school events or on trips away?

Provided this family has the financial means to buy in help such as dog walkers or dogs sitters, what is the problem?

Or even leaving the dog alone for - gasp - a few hours....

HoneyDragon · 18/11/2013 09:11

Because the dog would be alone from say 8:30 till 6:30 with maybe an hours companionship in the middle.

And I don't think it's fair on an eleven year old no matter how mature or sensible they are, or how badly they want the dog.

You see plenty of threads in here where people are shocked at how much care dogs need. I firmly believe that when getting an animal than the decision should be made by the person who will ultimately be in charge of its care in terms of bills, insurance, organisation, welfare and contentment. I think the decision should be made without thinking about how badly the other person wants a dog. And if part of you thinks I'm not sure I want to, than that's a good enough reason to say no.

HotPanda · 18/11/2013 10:12

I am a full time working dog owner, but I have to say I agree with the posts saying you need to structure your lives around the needs of the dog.

Both DH and I work. Dogs are walked 1st thing, then left while we are at work. I have a 2 hour lunch break which allows me to drive home, take the dogs to the park, have my own lunch and get back to work.
After work we walk them again. Evening we make sure that one of us is at home for company. I found the cinema comment resonating actually, as we used to, before dogs, go to the cinema in the evening once a week, but that had to stop.
Weekend routines are loosely the same as the week where by if we do have to go out we make sure we are back by lunch for the walk, but then stay in all afternoon if we have to go out in the evening.
If we do have event where we will be out all day we get a dog sitter in.

I would struggle as a sole adult to be able to work, do fun things with the DC's/ferry around to various clubs etc, have an active social life AND meet the companionship needs of a dog.

Booboostoo · 18/11/2013 10:34

Great decisions OP! You'll both have a lot of fun and you can never underestimate a cat! My cat comes along on walks with the dogs and does tricks (she always watched the dogs doing clicker training and one day she just came and sat along with the 4 dogs copying what they did for treats, it was hillarious!).

Spero · 18/11/2013 10:42

The son gets back at 3. He is not out at after school activities every evening surely?

idirdog · 18/11/2013 10:50

Spero give it a rest and go and spend some time with your dog please

We know your opinion - you are quite happy to leave your dog for hours - others disagree lets move on.

tabulahrasa · 18/11/2013 12:15

"The son gets back at 3. He is not out at after school activities every evening surely?"

Not currently - but the point was that if he's being relied on as dog care it might become a bit of a bind in a couple of years when he's a teenager. It might not, he might continue to be very happy to come home and spend time with a dog, but it is something to consider.

I think that working full time is not a barrier to having an adult dog as long as you have something in place to meet its needs while you're out, but being out all day and evenings and weekends isn't compatible with owning a dog and that you need to take into account your lifestyle before choosing a pet.

Only the OP knows whether her lifestyle could fit round a dog or not really and as she's now thinking about a cat, she's obviously decided that maybe she doesn't have enough free time for a dog.

Spero · 18/11/2013 13:14

With the greatest of respect, how and where I chose to comment is my business, unless and until I break the rules of this forum.

Someone has to be around to counter this insane 'dogs demand all your attention all the time, no one who works can have a dog' mantra.

Of course op has to think how things will play out as son and dog get older - but there are plenty of people willing to help you look after your dog, so provided you have spare cash for dog sitters etc why is this a problem?

My dogs have had a lovely snuffle in the field and now are going to be left alone for three hours whilst my daughter plays hockey. I fully expect them to be alive and happy on my return.

HoneyDragon · 18/11/2013 13:25

I'll stick to the science and professionals if it's all the same Spero. Rather than anecdote based on some inexplicable point scoring Confused

Belize · 18/11/2013 16:52

Surely as the child gets older then the dog will get older and therefore less bouncy and needing attention/company/taking on cinema outings ....

I think it is doable with a lot of thought but the OP said about 6 days ago that she has sensibly decided against getting a dog.

Original poster
feelinlucky · 18/11/2013 17:25

Thanks tabulah, we've been doing a lot of research and would only ever go to a responsible breeder for any animal. I imagine any responsible breeder would ensure they follow guidance to maintain the good health of the animal. We're not entirely stuck on a Scottish fold. I'm guessing we will end up at the rescue centre first :)

OP posts:
HoneyDragon · 18/11/2013 17:30

So exciting :-)

In case my earlier post gets misconstrued further, I'm sure you'd make wonderful dog owners, but when I read your post I didn't think you sounded 100% certain about dog ownership, and the future. Hence I think you've made a great decision and you'll love your cat when it arrives. Thanks

I am also very jealous. I'd love a cat so much.

Doghouseisscary · 18/11/2013 17:30

Evening we make sure that one of us is at home for company. I found the cinema comment resonating actually, as we used to, before dogs, go to the cinema in the evening once a week, but that had to stop.

...This is a joke, right...?

Belize · 18/11/2013 17:57

That is funny and 3 walks a day?!

I have a young Dalmatian and he gets one walk a day, sometimes 40 mins sometimes 2 hours. He doesn't 'expect' anything.

He is currently snoring in the utility room in front of the radiator, the idea that he would pine if I went off the cinema now is really quite bizarre.

Belize · 18/11/2013 17:59

Let me just add that the cinema deprived owners' dog is very lucky to have such caring owners that they devote all their spare time to walking and being around for the dog, much better than a neglected dog but you can go to far the other way.

Reminds me of that lovely but overly anxious poster Rollo with her Retriever, always wonder what happened to them?

everlong · 18/11/2013 18:10

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Spero · 18/11/2013 19:57

O yes Rollo! I was thinking of that poor lady and her poor dog as I was reading this. Didn't she sit for hours at a time holding onto one end of his kong as he chewed it?

Even the My Life Is Over When I Have A Dog Brigade were getting a bit impatient by the 20th thread.

I hope they both ended up ok. I think there were many other issues there which were being transferred onto the dog.

Belize · 18/11/2013 20:20

It was sad, she was so overwrought by the whole thing and the dog was clearly sensing this.

I remember her dragging her poorly children out in the freezing rain as the dog just had to have his hour walk Sad for all of them.

My snoring Dally hasn't moved a muscle for the last three hours, I could have got to the cinema and back in that time darn it.