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The doghouse

If you're worried about your pet's health, please speak to a vet or qualified professional.

Original poster

What job has your dog developed for itself?

46 replies

saffronwblue · 29/08/2013 05:43

Mine has a few.

  1. Mad pointless barking and guarding of the dishwasher when we stack or unstack it.
  1. Galloping round and round the henhouse while I feed the chooks. I just have to say 'chooks' to her and she is off with more mad pointless barking.
  2. Rounding up my DC if we are at the park and they go beyond her limit(they are 11 and 14, not toddlers).
  3. Racing out of the house with yet more mad pointless barking to try to bring down any plane that flies overhead (we live near an airport).
OP posts:
everlong · 30/08/2013 08:51

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MothershipG · 30/08/2013 08:53

Youngest dog is chief ear cleaner - he'll spend ages cleaning the other 2 dog's ears, he also does mine Grin and he'd like to do his other humans' but they are all spoilsports and won't let him.

Ddog1 is park police - whenever she thinks the other dogs are playing too rough (even if they are quite happy) she blocks until they give up and calm down.

Ddog2 let's the other 2 do all the work. Smile

froubylou · 30/08/2013 08:59

Chief Pot Licker. She can count and won't settle until she has had all 3 you know.

Foot warmer/bum warmer when on sofa.

Guardian against the devils spawn that is squirrils. And also cats.

Reminderer of the fact I have DD in school and she must be taken and collected at specific times. Dog hates afterschool clubs lol.

Informer of DP arriving home. And lets me know before I open door if it is friend or foe visiting.

Eater of all slightly soft or stale biscuits. And stands at side of you when you open biscuit cupboard to make sure you don't forget.

Oh and her favourite job is to take out the empty beer cans from the recycling bin, tilt them so any dregs run out, drink the dregs and continue to check until bin is empty. Bin now lives on top of black bin. And don't leave your coffee cup lying around either as she will test that for you to make sure it's not too hot to drink.

Loves my little whippy.

BeerTricksPotter · 30/08/2013 09:00

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everlong · 30/08/2013 09:04

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cleoteacher · 30/08/2013 09:08

Making sure she guards the house against the cat so she doesnt come in.
Telling me that my ds needs his nappy changing by sniffing his bum.
Letting me know the dog next door is awake by having a bark off with him in the morning.
Collecting wood for the fire.

Dumpylump · 30/08/2013 09:09

Protector of the air space around our house. Birds, planes, any insect larger than a midgie.......and as for the emergency services helicopter...don't get him started on the audacity of it - flying over his garden. The barking and howling is ferocious Grin

Casanunda · 30/08/2013 09:10

The newfie hasn't really appointed himself a job, apart from grassing up the spaniel! Any time he does something the newf disapproves of, he starts barking to let us know.

The spaniel, however, has appointed himself LOTS of roles! He's bedtime monitor - gets really grumpy if I don't go to bed at my usual time; shoe herder - although he tends to just steal one most of the time; he also likes to keep the floor clean by hoovering up any food type items; and his main role - cheerer-upper! After a really crappy day, he never fails to cheer me up with his ridiculous antics and joyful greetings when I get home from work Grin

MothershipG · 30/08/2013 09:12

It's quite ironic Beer as in her youth she was one of the worst offenders! Poacher turned gamekeeper. Wink

She is especially protective of her 2 younger, smaller dog brothers and another small boy dog we fostered before he was rehomed by a friend.

MrsDeVere · 30/08/2013 09:16

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Quodlibet · 30/08/2013 09:29

Ours used to go round the house counting everyone ('taking the register') if we were in separate rooms. She also used to herd up the outliers on walks, even if they were adults.

Self-appointed hedgehog herding duties in the evening was not very successful but she did give it a good go.

MothershipG · 30/08/2013 09:33

But MrsD did your Dad's dog then put them in the washbasket? I can't even train my children to do this!

nooka · 31/08/2013 05:54

froubylou our dog is very much a teetotaller. If you offer him any alcohol he growls most fiercely. Especially beer! He doesn't much approve of pop either.

Tea on the other hand must be waited for patiently and licked until every drop is gone.

Happiestinwellybobs · 31/08/2013 07:09

Mine is official meet and greeter to all visitors.

He also cleans the floor under DD's high chair until it shines

He is Recycling Assistant. Licks out all the plastic containers before they go in the bins.

Chaser of the pigeons - who eat all the bird food, so a very important job.

And hot water bottle/chief cuddler, which also means that DH has to get me drinks etc. I can't move with a 5 stone dog on my knee Grin

GreetingsFrontBottom · 31/08/2013 07:20

Our dog 'protects' us from garbage men trying to steal our garbage and gardeners trying to steal our grass.

She also brings her water bowl to you in her mouth if thirsty and food bowl if hungry. Once she was both thirsty and hungry and brought them both in her mouth at the same time! Considering she was a stray desert dog, with no training due to her lazy owners it is quite impressive.

ThursdayLast · 31/08/2013 07:34

Our Staffy is horse-seer-offer in chief, and to be fair to him he's never let one in the house yet Grin

We also call him the sometimes-apple-core-disposal-unit...he's not nearly as reliable at that!

NorksAreMessy · 31/08/2013 07:49

We live on a farm, so the dogs have full time jobs.

Old boy and pretty dog are VERY responsible for the bullocks in the field next to the house. They actually march up and down along the perimeter fence and do not allow any bullock within three feet.

Most birds are allowed to visit the bird feeders but pigeons are NOT allowed on the lawn.

Neurotic dog protects our airspace. Military aircraft are acceptable, gliders and hot air balloons are not

fat dog is a demon rat catcher. We have never seen a LIVE rat here.

neurotic dog is a brilliant doctor, both physical and mental distress are tended to most carefully

laundry, apparently has to be kept warm if it has been thrown on the floor in front of the washing machine. In fact some used pants clearly need to live in the sitting room Blush and the dogs look very cheesed off when I try to put laundry into the machine

One or other dog always accompanies me to the loo, just in case I fall in

I love my dogs :)

ThursdayLast · 31/08/2013 07:51

Norks,
Pretty handy yo have a rat catcher...my parents have a farm and when their dog was young she ate the rat POISON.

Not nearly so useful, much more expensive.

NorksAreMessy · 31/08/2013 08:00

thursday :( poor pooch.

fat dog is VERY efficient. One shake and the rat is a goner

Steffanoid · 31/08/2013 08:08

our JRT has ensured that no birds fly over our garden, or my mums garden. ..
he also keeps guard over the gard3n from his bed and waits by the front door for dp to come home, an hour before he gets home Hmm

Original poster
saffronwblue · 31/08/2013 09:18

How could I have forgotten my dog's loo supervisory duties?

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