Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

The doghouse

If you're worried about your pet's health, please speak to a vet or qualified professional.

Flip

1 2 3 4 5 6

Original poster

My beautiful lab is really ill.

133 replies

dogsagoodun · 24/07/2013 19:38

He's not been himself for a couple of weeks; off his food and lethargic. I just put it down to the heat. He was drinking plenty and still seemed ok.

Today he emptied his bowels all over the dining room floor and I just knew. I called DH to come.home and take him to the vets. The vet said he is a very poorly dog. He thinks hepatitis or liver cancer. He's having a scan tomorrow. He said he's going to get very poorly over the next couple of weeks and actually couldn't believe how lively he was. My brave boy.

I feel so sad and scared.

OP posts:

babysaurus · 27/07/2013 23:47

You poor darling! My beautiful cat was PTS yesterday after liver problems (its been a very harrowing week!) and it just feels so heart wrenchingly awful doesn't it? The only thing I can say is that it will ease eventually but in the meantime, cry - don't bottle it up!
My thoughts are with you xxx

punter · 28/07/2013 07:55

So sorry for your loss, must have been such a shock to have things happen so quickly. Hugs.

1MitchellMum · 28/07/2013 07:57

I'm so sorry. I lost a dog to liver cancer, it came on very quickly. Know just how you feel. You did all you could do. RIP lovely boy. x

toomuch2young · 28/07/2013 08:02

I am so so sorry for your loss. Charlie sounds a beautiful special boy and he will live in your heart and memories forever. Am all choked up reading this. Sending hugs to you and your family.
When my cat died, after about a month I made a photo album of all his pictures and that really helped to remember the lovely times and his beautiful nature. Dread anything happening to the dogs.
Grief is the price we pay for love. Take care x

momnipotent · 28/07/2013 11:39

I am so so sorry to hear this. I lost my old boy three weeks ago to cancer - bastard disease, how DARE you take my dog! - and still struggling. I know it just requires time. I keep telling myself that he is only physically gone, but he is still my dog, he is always with me in my mind and in my heart. That helps sometimes. He had always been here since before the kids were born but they handled it very well much better than me. Kids are remarkably resilient.

Thoughts with you today.

FlatCapAndAWhippet · 28/07/2013 15:59

Oh no :( I'm so sorry he's gone, I feel so sad for you. I know only too well how devastating this is, sending you our love from the Peak District. xx

cocolepew · 28/07/2013 16:06

I'm so sorry, how sad for you all.
I'm sorry about your cat too, babysaurus.

out2lunch · 28/07/2013 17:33

so sad xx rest in peace Charlie xx

topbannana · 28/07/2013 18:40

So sorry to hear this, my heart goes out to you and your family. And to echo a PP, the grief did not really start to lessen beyond the initial shock until we got our DPup.
As hard as it will seem now, the love and laughter a puppy or rescue will bring can help your family move on. Bizarrely since we had our puppy we talk about BlackDog so much more (almost on a daily basis) so she is most definitely not forgotten.
Big hugs to you and your family

babysaurus · 28/07/2013 19:34

Thank you Cocolepew x

Re getting another dog at some point, someone

babysaurus · 28/07/2013 19:37

Sorry pressed post accidentally.

Re getting another dog, or cat, at some point someone once described it as the biggest compliment you can give to the (furry) member of your family who passed away.

I hope you're faring okay, considering. Bloody hard as it is!

toomuch 'grief is the price we pay for love' - how very true!

momnipotent · 28/07/2013 21:28

I am not sure if this is helpful, it is a poem that pops up regularly on my FB from various dog rescues:

A Dog?s Last Will & Testament

Before humans die, they write their last will and testament, giving their home and all they have to those they leave behind. If, with my paws, I could do the same, this is what I?d ask?

To a poor and lonely stray I?d give my happy home; my bowl and cozy bed, soft pillow and all my toys; the lap, which I loved so much; the hand that stroked my fur; and the sweet voice that spoke my name.

I?d will to the sad, scared shelter dog the place I had in my human?s loving heart, of which there seemed no bounds.

So, when I die, please do not say, ?I will never have a pet again, for the loss and the pain is more than I can stand.?

Instead, go find an unloved dog, one whose life has held no joy or hope, and give my place to him.

This is the only thing I can give?

The love I left behind.

Original poster

dogsagoodun · 28/07/2013 22:46

Such lovely words. We've had this conversation tonight. I'm just not sure. I think we need to recover from the shock first. Then, maybe...

Does anyone have any ideas how to help my five year old. He's struggling. I've suggested we make a scrapbook of all our favourite memories of him and he liked that idea. Anything else I can do?

This is tough. We've laughed a lot more this evening though, recounting tales of his mischief!

OP posts:

Wheresmycaffeinedrip · 28/07/2013 22:55

When we lost our cat, I bought my dd a cuddly toy of a cat the same colour and we named it after her.

Is that something you think your Ds would like. Something to remind him of Charlie so he doesn't have to worry about forgetting him. He can talk to him too and remember all the happy times when he snuggles up with it at night.

cq · 28/07/2013 22:57

So hard to know what to do, but this helped us:

Have a little memorial service. Things like that help the children to 'do' something about the sad situation you are all in.

Can you bring him home to bury him? Not always possible, esp if you're in a rented house. If not, perhaps bury his collar or something of his. Plant a tree or shrub for him in your garden.

Don't rush to put away his bed etc - the empty space may feel worse than being reminded of him when you see his bed.

Just do whatever feels right.

So sad for you all.

Original poster

dogsagoodun · 28/07/2013 22:58

That's a really lovely idea. I think he'd love that. Thank you. I'll have a look tomorrow.

OP posts:

SallyBear · 28/07/2013 22:58

Dogsagoodun we had the same issue recently with DS3 who is 7. It's taken him about a month to get over Sally's death. Lots of tears. Generally at bedtime while he was thinking about things. After a week of this, I told him that we would get a new puppy. We looked at photos and selected a breeder. DH and I went to see them, took photos, he still cried. Last week we buried her ashes and planted a tree. He helped put the ashes into the hole, crying hard. This week we took him to the breeder and he helped choose and name a puppy. We are getting the puppy in a month. He now has a photo of himself holding the puppy by his bed. I think that we needed to go through the whole process with him, to help him come to terms with our old girl's death. He is really looking forward to Toby arriving now.

Original poster

dogsagoodun · 28/07/2013 23:00

Both lovely ideas. We are bringing his ashes home but still don't know where to scatter them.

OP posts:

SallyBear · 28/07/2013 23:02

Dogs, I couldn't scatter her ashes. It just didn't seem right. Planting a tree over her ashes felt as if she was finally home after being away.

Original poster

dogsagoodun · 28/07/2013 23:06

Sally Bear, I think burying them is a better idea. Did you do it at home? The reason I can't decide is what happens if we move house? It's likely that we will at some point although not for a while.

OP posts:

SallyBear · 28/07/2013 23:09

The way I looked at it was that if we ever did move, Sally would be leaving a lasting legacy in the shape of a beautiful variegated leafed Norwegian Acer, providing both shape and beauty with dappled shade in the garden.

MissAntithetic · 28/07/2013 23:10

I feel your pain. I lost my dog in December and although the dog hair is slowly diminishing I don't think the hole in my heart ever will.

It's never long enough is it.

I'm not ready for another dog, selfish as I may feel I just can't go through that again right now but in time I hope I can. A dog brings much more than muddy paws to your life.

MissAntithetic · 28/07/2013 23:12

I have my dogs ashes in a little urn with his name on. I couldn't bring myself to scatter them and I intend on moving so burying wasn't an option. They are on the sideboard above his most favourite place to lay.

momnipotent · 29/07/2013 01:38

I didn't ask for my old boy's ashes because to me that wasn't him, he was the big fluffy lump on the floor and that is how I want to remember him. His collar hangs in my office. It's where both of us spent most of our days so instead of looking over at him I now look over at his collar. In his memory I plan on buying a large ornament for the garden that can easily be moved when/if we leave this house. I don't actually know what it will be yet, but I will know it when I see it.

The vet sent me flowers on the day he died and I had them in a vase in the house and they lasted almost 2 weeks. I couldn't bring myself to put them into the green bin that gets picked up by the town though so I put them in the composter in our garden so that that final part of him is always here. Which is silly because the flowers came after he was already gone.

Immediately after he died I was all gung ho to get another dog right away. My lovely boy was actually the second dog we lost in one week, the first was our foster dog that we had had for 6 months (he didn't die, he was just moved to another province because of BSL). That was truly the most awful week I have ever had. We were going away the next week and my plan was to get another dog as soon as we got back. I'm glad that the desperation for another dog passed while I was away and now I have time to think. Instead of getting another dog I started volunteering as a dog walker at the local shelter. I know we will get another dog eventually but I want it to be an unloved and unwanted dog that I can 'save'. I'm not sure, but right now there is an 8 year old lab mix at our local shelter. She came from a horrible situation and she is very scared and timid, she is also older and she is black - three things that will make it difficult to get her adopted. I am going to wait a couple of more weeks but if nobody else takes her I think I might. I know she would only be with us for a couple of years and then I'd be like this again, but to me this is the best way to honour my boy. Cute puppies are easy to adopt out, but I think this girl might need me more.

babysaurus · 29/07/2013 14:37

Flip

1 2 3 4 5 6