Feeling very despondent tonight, doom-mongers galore!

[Gorran]

Right, so word has got out (thanks to my extremely excited 7yo telling all her friends that we're getting a pup) and absolutely everything everyone has had to say has been negative.

Labrador puppies are awful, so destructive, have eaten through various friends' brother's cousins' walls, turned their gardens into tips, uncontrollable, horrible dogs until they're well past two years, too much work, you name it - they've said it.

I was so excited and really thought we were doing the right thing. I'm a SAHM/Housewife (call it what you will), my husband also works from home 3/4 days a week, we're very keen on making sure the dog is well-trained, well, not just keen, it's absolutely imperative to us. Will do everything by the book and I generally thought we had the right idea. Now I'm just so nervous. We know all the pitfalls, the hard work etc. but we also thought it would be fun, great for us as a family, brilliant for our daughters, a fantastic stress-reliever for my husband (eventually, anyway!) - everyone is just making it sound like one hard slog, and just not worth it.

I think I could do with some positive thinking!

Labs can't be that bad, otherwise they wouldn't be so popular!

Out walking yesterday I met 2 women that both had a 9 month old black lab (brothers). They had loads of fun with my dog, but, unlike mine, had perfect recall.

You sound like you're going in fully prepared OP, hope it all works out well and is lots of fun.

You will be fine and the positives will outweigh the bad bits. I had a lovely walk with Plog listening to a cuckoo on Tuesday in the woods which made up for the fact that she chewed a hole in my beanbag at the age of 3 the other day. To be fair I think she thought it was a ball , then it split and she got more than she bargained for, went to find DH and licked him to say sorry and get him to look at the carnage.

Which might sound bad but it's a huge improvement to when she kept eating the sofa, books off the bookcase, squeezing into neighbours garden and raiding their plant pot pile till we worked it out, all my plants, the plug off a broken TV waiting to go back for a refund, stolen huge amounts of food, and really the list went on.

We used a crate, both worked from home and at one point were doing two puppy classes a week. It was just her personality. But at three that's now a plus. She's always enthusiastic and up for a play, is one of the friendliest dogs in the woods, was brilliant about not mouthing. DS was scared of her as a pup as she was so bouncy but loves her now, so great to see thm together. She cheers up DD who has been having teen friendship issues, they sit on the one sofa she's allowed on together. She's also made it her job to let us know if someone is coming down the drive and is a great doorbell and burglar deterrent , DH and I are much fitter and feel much more connected to the seasons (when they happen !) and the house feels So empty when she's not there.

It will be chaos at times, you will regret getting her but this will pass and eventually you'll get a well behaved dog who is a much loved member of your household (and stinks buy some Tap a Drop)

Going into dog ownership with the attitude you have is no bad thing tbh.

Its the people who buy a cute little puppy-wuppy and expect everything to be sunshine and roses from the off that (ironically) will have a much harder time.

The thing that really helped us is that we socialised like socialisation is going out of fashion when he was a pup. We had a 'meet a new friend/have a new experience every day' policy and it has really paid dividends.

Now he is a typical teenage dog, he's a bit of a horror, but we are confident that he'll come out of it a lovely mature dog I really hope that happens sometime soon

Gwen Baily book is excellent - we just did everything she recommends and are kind of happy with the results.

I'm sorry to say though, we do need pics of the little chappess to coo over

Our lab puppy just turned 2 years old this week! He is lovely, but it was hard work at first - he is starting to calm down now.

We used a crate from the beginning and supervised constantly, provided plenty of chews and toys so ended up with very few chewed possessions. We have some puppy toothmarks on the legs of our kitchen chairs, and a small pulled/frayed bit on the join in our kitchen carpet but that is about it! Oh, apart from a pair of "granny slippers" I bought for dd to protect her feet from the crocodile pup - they are long gone!

The hardest bits for me to cope with were the play-biting for the first few months and getting up very early for months on end to let him out when he needed the toilet. He seemed to take a long time to last all through the night.

We started puppy classes just after his second jabs and are still going to dog training classes - he and dd love it so much!

Our remaining problems now are pulling on the lead when excited, jumping up at people if not reminded constantly to stay off, wanting to play with all the dogs he meets, and eating anything he can get his paws on outside! He has to be accompanied in the garden at all times or he eats cat poo, plants, twigs ... everything! Saying that, we don't have that problem inside - he has never stolen anything from the work surfaces in the kitchen.

I'm sure you'll be fine! Puppies are very time-consuming to start with, but if you are prepared to put in the time and effort then, you reap the rewards later.

Is she home yet???

excited for you

The doom-mongers talk bollocks.

Bollocks I tell you.

Yes. A puppy can chew, and yes it will wee and poo all over the place but each time it does it it's OUR fault. Each and every time.

We control our puppies behaviour by making sure they can't do anything wrong. Make sure there's nothing around to chew and keep on taking them outside every half hour, after every sleep, after every game and every meal. Make sure they never learn to pull on the lead and you won't have to train them not to.

Don't use an extendable lead, don't try and teach lead walking while on the way somewhere - especial not a walk. Do it in the garden, the kitchen etc. Pulling on the lead is naturally rewarding for a dog - it gets them places quicker - so don't let it!

re the chewing- I don't think it is all that preventable tbh. Unless you crate a dog to restrain them, which I hate. I had two not all that chewy dogs and even they got through a few pairs of shoes and the odd chair leg. But its part and parcel of having a puppy- the chewy stage doesn't last long at all. So I echo other posters in that yes, it is possible to have a reasonably well behaved adult dog, but there will be blips, and there is no accounting for personality!

Thank you all so much! I cannot tell you how lovely it is to read all your messages - yes, they speak the truth, yes, you're telling me it will be hard work, yes, possessions will probably be damaged BUT, you also tell me that owning a dog is, fun, rewarding and a fantastic thing to do. So far, most other people have missed those gems out;-)

We collect Daisy tonight and I shall be sure to take plenty of pics!

good luck with Daisy! (we have a daisy of our own ). Just remember, occasionally your puppy will drive you to breaking point, just like our DC do, then they will get it and you will realise what a wonderful addition to your family you have.

Definately use a crate, I had a rehomed year old doodle, who ate an entire sofa one night before I decided enough was enough and shoved her back in a crate. Within 2 weeks she transformed her behaviour. 2ys on she is a star - still a loon at times - but we all love her.

oh they are all the bad things you have been told, and worse - but it all pales into insignificance compared to the joy they bring into your life x

Just seen this - is that Daisy on your profile ? Hope all is going well, our pup is now 6 months and I'm not going to lie it's been hard work at times but sooo worth it! Ian Dunbar's Before and After getting your puppy is great - good advice on crate training and how to combat chewing! Basically your puppy is going to chew, so make sure it has the right things to chew - like Kongs and other toys rather than your furniture . Our pup started to try to the cupboards, but I got some spray from the pet shop which really worked well. Make sure the DCs know to let sleeping dogs lie as pups do need lots of sleep. You won't regret your decision, and I'm sure you and your DCs will love Daisy to bits!

Yes you have to be realistic, puppies are a pain in the arse! But that is the point, all puppies are and it is likely that some things will be chewed on or weed on. It is part of having a well behaved adult dog, you have to be able to deal with the bad stuff calmly and accept that they will be infuriating. While training is important, it is absolutely vital that the dog trusts and respects you because a pup raised on fear and confusion is the adult dog who is unpredictable. Join a puppy training and socialisation group, get a crate for the early days ad enjoy the good times and the bad alike. I am the proud owner of 1 Gucci flip flop this week, the other is in small pieces. Whose fault was that? Mine of course for leaving it out in his radar, he is teething and doesn't know the difference between that and the dog chews yet. He is a happy, bouncy little guy who has no emotional damage from being chucked out of a car window at 3 weeks old and is now rehomeable. Saluki puppy anyone?

Aw bless! The kids will love it once it stops chewing their PJ's every morning, we have a 13 week flatcoat retriever. He's gorgeous, and yes he is mischievous (whilst I'm typing this he's tried to chew the laptop, has chewed into a bag of cat litter, stolen an empty pringles can from the counter top & disappeared to the bottom of the garden- all a moments work for Freddie AKA Fred the Shred) but he is learning very quickly and we start training tonight. Be patient, keep your SOH and you'll notice puppy getting better every day. It helps if you have eyes in the back of your head :) and think back to the children at early toddler stage- into everything. I too recommend a crate as then you can for example go and have a shower without coming down to find the kitchen floor's been eaten, yes, I speak from experience... We've also found a baby-gate across the kitchen door has been useful. And it is AMAZING what you'll forgive when faced with a pair of soulful brown eyes and a waggy tail.

I have never told anyone about puppy buying plans i have had over the years for the exact reason you have mentioned,EVERYONE would of stuck their oar in and took all the pleasure out of it;
Never mind the miseries, you will love your puppy:)

have u got a dog hoodoo?

I have a lab who is now 2.

I didn't use a crate and didn't have an overly destructive puppy.

I work at home so was with her and kept her occupied and a good eye on her.
If I went out I made sure that she had a good walk , as much as she could as a pup and initally she was kept in a passage way within the house where she couldn't do much damage. I did have to lock the downstairs toilet from the outside as she would open it and do an impression of the Andrex puppy !

As time went on she was allowed in the back room on her own - she had plenty of toys to chew on - stuffed kongs etc and all was ok.

She never chewed chairs, skirting board etc but was partial to shoes - so we learnt to put them away - she did like cushions - so she was never allowed in the lounge without supervision .She doesn't touch either now but she loves socks.

You can have a puppy that isn't too destructive - yes they will chew but they dont have to destroy your home.

But she does eat the strawberries growing in the garden ....

@Nuggets, At the moment i have a golden retriever and a terrier cross, before that i had a jack russell and a cocker spaniel.
The comments i had when i brought my first dog home (JR)made me very glad i never told anyone beforehand, some people love to take the joy out of everything:

aww how lovely hoodoo. There are some very negative comments when you mention getting a dog! I haven;t told anyone yet (bitch is not confirmed in whelp yet) but I am sure I would get a few tut tuts. Shame really that family can rain on your parade like that.....

OH MY GOD! Sorry for the over-enthusiastic capital letters but I WISH I'd known about this site before we got a puppy. She was a 12 wk collie cross puppy from a rescue. It probably (definitely) wasn't the best choice of breed and she was pretty manic! It had taken a lot of persuasion to get agreement from my OH to get a puppy in the first place and I hadn't realised what a hell of a lot of work it would be. It also, with hindsight, not the best time to get her. It was November, bloody cold to be out in the garden all the time, I was still getting over the death of my mother and being made redundant. Being honest, it was a huge mistake! I also had negative comments from EVERYONE I knew. She also smelt really, really bad! I'm not joking, we barely ate for one week because the smell was awful (she'd been checked out at the vets so it wasn't a medical issue). I don't know what it was, baths didn't help and I lost loads of weight because of the smell and the stress. After a week, I'm ashamed to say that I had a complete meltdown and we returned her to the rescue. It has been awful ever since - I feel a complete failure and my daughter, of course, was completely traumatised by the whole experience. I now know that I'm not the only one who's done this but I feel very shitty about the whole experience because I never thought I was "that" kind of person to return a dog. Now, after loads of research and thinking, I would like to try again, would get an older dog, a different breed etc but no-one else in the family wants to try again... I wish I could go back in time and make different decisions because I would do it so differently and I would love the companionship, love, walks and fun that I'm sure the right dog would bring us.